Drunk baby's dad asleep on my floor!

[Mrsdropdeadfred]

Woken at 4 this morning to Dds dad ringing saying that he's in the area, just about to walk outside my house and can he pop in. Being half asleep and fucking stupid I let him in and didn't realise how drunk he was until he got in the front room.
He had a bit of a natter with baby dd, staring talking gibberish at me then passed out on the living room floor
I've been trying to wake him for the past hour, he pretty much has his head wedged between an armchair and the wooden toy storage so I can't really even try to move him. My older kids will be up soon and the last thing I want them to see is their little sisters dad passed out, snoring and randomly shouting out bollocks.
Would ibu to go mental at him when he finally sobers up? And any tips on shifting a pissed up 15st bloke before 6.30 would be appreciated

Pour a bowl of ice water on his head. Then kick him in the balls.

Cold water on his face. Get him out of the house. If he really won't wake at all get him into the recovery position at least.

I wouldn't go mental at him, btw. But I'd calmly, firmly say that he is not to be around his daughter when he has been drinking. A grown man drinking to the point of passing out randomly on someone's floor, in front of his child, should be a massive wake up call to him that he needs help with his drinking though. If it isn't then you may need to put some very firm barriers in place. Such as not answering the phone to him in the first place at 4am, for starters.

Drunk, unconscious and won't leave? I'd be tempted to cal 101 and see if they can remove him.

In future, please don't let him in.

Cold water, or 101,

Yes call police, that way you have a record too.

I really wouldn't antagonise a drunk with cold water. You just don't know how he will react.

When he is sober, bollocks him then if you like.

Does he have any family who cool come and fetch him?

Could come and fetch him.

Police.

Don't instigate violence as a PP suggested.

Leave him on the floor.

Tell older kids he is having a sleep over - like they do with their friends. But he fell off the sofa so is asleep on the floor.

When he wakes up. Glass of cold water and kick him out.

Dont let him in again randomly without warning

I should say my glass of cold water is for him to drink. Do not be violent towards him.

Cold water and kick to the bollocks was very tempting but decided against it... my ex was a abusive arsehole especially when drunk so I can be abit cautious around drunk people.
He works nights so does tend to come round early hours in the morning to help with dd.
I wouldn't go completely mental but I'll be making it very clear this shit will never happen again.

I wouldn't touch him - tempting though it would be!

Explain to older kids he fell asleep, I'd ommit the drunken bit. Tell them to make as much noise as they like. That will soon shift him...

Save you talk with him for later!

Humour him while he's there but get him out asap and never let him in again

Is he definitely drunk? Can you smell it on him?

Just wondering if he might be ill?

Has he any family you could phone?

I'd pull his socks off and paint his toe nails - then when dry put his socks back on ... it might cause enough confusion to remind him not get so drunk again !

I can't believe people are telling you to wake a drink man by assaulting him yes because that's really going to help OP, and potentially see her self being assaulted herself.

Call 101 OP

If he's only asleep, I'd just leave him and talk when he's sober.

You really don't want a record of police 'domestic' call outs unless you want your health visitor/SS on your back.

101 ? seriously ? What world do you lot live in? Don't you think the police have better things to do than go round picking up drunks that people have invited into their houses to sleep it off?

I can't believe people are suggesting calling the police!

Keep the DC out of the room and explain that he's sleeping and not to be disturbed. Sadly you may just have to wait it out until he wakes. Then tell him to go. If he protests have you a big male you can ask to pop over to give you some back up?
Do NOT throw water over him , hit him etc ( what bizarre and dangerous advise)

Wait it out until he wakes up. Then give him a piece of your mind and send him on his way knowing in no uncertain terms this is never to be repeated.

Try to keep the kids out of the room but if they do wonder in then use him to explain the perils of drink...it's him who'll be embarrassed.

Police?!? Why?

Total overreaction unless there is some history we don't know about

Glass of cold water and kick him out

This.

No tea/coffee, and definitely no breakfast. If he pees, vomits anywhere, make him clean it up.

He might complain about not getting even a cuppa - tell him you've been stuck in the house waiting for him to wake up and have things to do/places to go.

And don't let the arsehole in again at daft o'clock.

How old is dd? A very young baby? Are you usually up with her at 4am? Otherwise I don't understand how much help he can be with a sleeping baby at 4am.

Visits by arrangement only in future. No drunkenness.