Damn sunshades are not the right size or shape.

[MOIST]

And either my feet are sticking out, or an arm, or one other bit.

And the bloody shade keeps bloody moving. It's really not on.

I thought you meant one for a buggy and was coming on to recommend one I bought recently.

I thought it was going to be a rant about the sunshade in cars - you put them down but the sun is always in that bit in the middle where there is no sun shade!

Hire a servant to move it with the sun and hold up a parasol to cover the big it misses.

'Bit' not 'big'

Flippin phone

I thought this was about car windows

What with the shade moving. The lepersoys heat rash driving me nuts and the annoying kid with the piercing voice that sets my teeth on edge I am getting tetchy.

Kid is just a small boy having fun. But sweet lord he's never been taught voice modulation.