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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be fed up with school over this?

30 replies

ClarkWGriswold · 03/07/2017 16:05

DD is 5 and in reception. Her summer uniform is one of those generic gingham dresses in pale yellow. About once a week she comes home with white board marker and paint all over her dresses. Four have now been ruined, one was covered in burgundy paint.

Last week I bought her 3 new dresses to replace the ruined ones. Today she comes out of class with blue paint all over her dress. I've now got it in the wash with stain treatment and am hoping for the best

AIBU to bring this up with the school. I genuinely don't know if this is something I should approach the teacher about or if my DD is expected to take responsibility for herself. I am generally very happy with the school and also don't want to be seen as a PITA mother.

OP posts:
StillDrivingMeBonkers · 03/07/2017 16:07

Do they not ask for - like the good old days - for you to send in one of dads old shirts , buttoned up at the back and used as an all over apron?

Sirzy · 03/07/2017 16:07

Remind her to put on an apron.

But to be honest as long as it's clean I wouldn't worry about a few paint stains or whatever. It's par for the course with a lot of young children.

endofthelinefinally · 03/07/2017 16:07

Why dont they have aprons or overalls?

honeysucklejasmine · 03/07/2017 16:09

Don't primary schools furnish them with "Dad's old shirt" for painting any more? I wouldn't expect reception children to stay clean without some sort of protection.

Screwinthetuna · 03/07/2017 16:10

I wouldn't bring it up with the teacher. I'd spot treat it and if it leaves a stain, so be it. It's almost the end of term and most kids will have white board marker on their clothes, at least mine does.

Original poster
ClarkWGriswold · 03/07/2017 16:12

Sorry forgot to say I've asked her about wearing an apron and she said they don't have any. We have also never been asked to bring one in.

OP posts:
inkydinky · 03/07/2017 16:12

I don't think you're unreasonable to be frustrated. But the school won't do anything. We had the same issue. Pen marks were largely caused by other children so an apron when she was using the pens herself wouldnt have helped her. I stopped replacing ruined polo shorts and dresses. Just accepted that by the end of the year they'd be messy. I kept one good one for school photos etc. Lots of us did the same. The marks get less as they get older fortunately!

inkydinky · 03/07/2017 16:14

I also switched from £12 John Lewis dresses to £5 Asda ones. It annoyed me less then!

Bluntness100 · 03/07/2017 16:15

Speak to the school. Weird they don't use aprons, ours had aprons that were like little coats that wrapped round them. She got all manner of shit on it but protected the clothes. Give them a call, thE other kids may be using something and it's up to parents discretion.

hmmwhatatodo · 03/07/2017 19:08

No don't speak to the teachers about it, whiteboard pen marks and paint stains are to be expected in early years. I'm not sure how ruined the dresses can be that you felt the need to go out and buy 3 more right at the end of term. No one at school cares that they are covered in pen marks. Find something else to worry about.

monkeysox · 03/07/2017 19:20

Two checked dresses 7 pounds in matalan.
Yabu she's 5.
There's not much time left until hols. Send her in clean (slightly pen marked) dresses?

Screwinthetuna · 03/07/2017 19:24

A bit random but can anyone else remember the feeling and smell of those thick, over the head aprons in primary school? Also, being the last to get an apron and getting the scruffy old man'a shirt with the wet sleeves Grin
They really should have aprons, op, even if they are just old shirts

ittakes2 · 03/07/2017 20:26

Maybe ask the teacher if you can send her in with an apron. We had to supply these as standard so surprised your school hasn't asked for these.

kesstrel · 03/07/2017 20:37

Water based paint, which is what they are almost certainly using in school, comes off quite easily if you rub it with green "household soap" (comes in a bar). Stain solution is unlikely to work. (Of course an apron would be better!)

Sushi123 · 03/07/2017 20:39

I'd definitely bring it up with the school

ScarletSienna · 03/07/2017 20:43

I would bring it up-it doesn't matter how much the dresses cost, it's silly to have things get damaged if that can be prevented or lessened.

Tazerface · 03/07/2017 20:50

Why on earth do you replace school uniform for a five year old? If it's not being kept clean you are just throwing money down the drain, surely?

I have a Reception aged child, he is often covered in paint and pen - sometimes it comes out and sometimes it doesn't. He's 5, I'm not going to worry myself about it at his age.

I also think you should check with school because I think it's unlikely they don't have pinnys - more like she gets involved before she gets it on. Check as in, 'should we arrange pinnys for next year as this year DD says she didn't have one'?

minisoksmakehardwork · 03/07/2017 20:51

It might not be about whether they have aprons or not, although I appreciate op's dd says they don't have them. We have had the same thing with school uniforms and upon investigation, I was told they can't ask or tell the children to put an apron on as the choice is about learning independence, I kid you not. The teacher I was talking to even said, when I asked, that they couldn't suggest the child did in any way either, e.g. do you want an apron, have you forgotten anything? etc as that would be taking their independence away! - the same thing was said about coats outside in winter. Needless to say I have given up now and have told the school I will not be replacing uniform this close to the end of the year.

hmmwhatatodo · 03/07/2017 21:02

But why would the school ask you to replace the uniform? I've never known that to happen in reception

BlackeyedSusan · 03/07/2017 21:05

wash in cold water with soap. ordinary tablet soap. white board markers come out afer about half an hour soaked in the soap if you wet the stain and rub it on.

paint is tricker. the purple paint is the worst.

PandasRock · 03/07/2017 21:13

I must have very low standards.

I don't buy new uniform just because of paint stains/marker pen marks. Ds is coming to the end of reception, and he has had 3 polo tops (pale blue, or at least they were originally Grin) and 2 pairs of shorts all year.

I don't keep a 'best' for school photos - imo, the best school photo is one that is a true representation of your child as they are day-to-day in that school year, paint stain/pen marks/scuffed shoes and scruffy hair and all. I go through the proofs of school photos trying to find the one that is closest to 'my' dc, rather than the sanitised scrubbed clean version that always looks slightly odd.

I would be annoyed if school,didn't allow apron use, but if you haven't asked/sent one in then the problem is partly of your making.

Original poster
ClarkWGriswold · 03/07/2017 21:13

whatatodo who said the school had asked me to replace her uniform? I have replaced it because I don't want her going to school with massive brown and blue splodges all over her dresses. Also the dresses I have bought as replacements are a size up so she will be able to wear them in September when she starts the new school year.

OP posts:
youarenotkiddingme · 03/07/2017 21:14

I hate to say it but my very soon to be 13yo Ds still comes ot of school like this sometimes!

Currently he has some paint that won't come out of his shoes decorating them!
The shirt he was wearing went in the bin!

Cotton shirts are not good for keeping paint out - it seeps through.

Plastic aprons often don't cover enough of clothing to keep them clean.

I've learnt to just bin anything dreadful and send him back in anything passable as it'll just get covered again!

hmmwhatatodo · 03/07/2017 21:16

Sorry op, my comment was to the poster directly above me. Honestly, no one in school will care less about how many paint marks and pen marks she has on her clothes.

Allyg1185 · 03/07/2017 21:19

My ds school is the same but what adds insult to injury is they asked for an old parents tshirt for him to wear. Don't think its moved from his tray and he comes home filthy