To Find This Interering

[ShitStorm2017]

Morning all!

I don't know if I am BU but I find it so irritating! We live about 65 miles away from MIL and she has 'liked' a FB for sale sight in my area. Problem is, she is notified whenever I post anything!

For example, I posted looking for a baby gym for DD (11 months) and she messaged DP saying how she didn't think it was suitable for someone her age.

Another example is I asked looking for a man with a van as we're moving house soon. DP then gets a message telling us we don't need one. His step DB (on his DF's side) will get one from where they live and drive it here.

I just find it interfering and bloody annoying that I can't post anything without her knowing and trying to micro-manage our lives!

Just ignore her or block her from your Facebook then she can't see what you're doing

You can change privacy settings when you post so that she can't see them.

I don't think you can as I'm posting on a public page, it warns you at the top. I've tried!

I can't block her as we communicate via FB and it would really hurt her and cause a lot of bother.

Ah, bugger. So she's just being a nosy cow then.

I guess you could contact the group admin and ask if they can do anything?

Sounds like she's lonely and a bit over involved. I'm sure she means well, though is obviously wrong.

The problem isn't her though, it's your DP. His response to her needs to be "Shitstorm is handling it and has everything sorted". You shouldn't even know she texted him unless you want to.

My MIL has plenty of "helpful" suggestions. Water was leaking through the fire alarm last time she visited so I was about to call an electrician. She said no, call BIL because he knows a bit about electronics. He also lives a 2 hour flight away and is NOT an electrician. DP ran interference while I solved the problem (and therefore did not need to have stern words with her). Have a word with your DP.

So she gets a notification when you post on a public page? Or does your timeline get updated?

There must be a way to stop this.

See if she was lonely I might understand but she isn't! She's a young GP with a DS of her own (9yo) and is always socialising with friends.

I just genuinely think she has to know everything that's going on in our lives and have an input.

She gets a notification.

'ShitStorm has posted on For Sale in England'

I get them all the time about other friends if we've liked the same page. Very annoying!

Yeah your husband does need to have a word and say you know what you're doing

Set up a fake account to avoid the MIL?

I'm sure you can update your settings so you don't actually block people but they don't see your posts

I think she is just trying to help you. All you need to do is buy the baby gym anyway if you want it. Tbh, I think the van suggestion was helpful - it usually works out cheaper to get things like that from family.
Don't get so hung up on not letting her know anything that you throw the baby out with the bath water and ignore advice that could actually benefit you.

Setting up a new account for the selling pages is a good idea if it really bothers you.

I'd report it to the page admin tbh, they're using the page to keep tabs on you. It's weird!

Re notifications - go to the page and change them! Think you click on 'following' and you can pick and choose of you want friends notifications, or just none at all

Yes, new FB account with slightly different name is the way to go 😁

You need a fake Facebook profile just for this group. I'm a member of some groups and mostly I find it boring but there is a setting for only getting updates when your friends post, I imagine this is what she is doing.

So new Facebook account for practical stuff you don't want her to see. Easy peasy.

Ah thank you princess.

I get that family can be useful but a) it isn't MIL's job to volunteer her ex's step son. b) We already have help arranged.

You could put her on your 'restricted' list on Facebook. You then remain friends but they stop being able to see what you post, if they go on to your timeline it will show them what you've posted but it stops it from coming up on their news feed. It's like blocking somebody without actually blocking them if you know what I mean?!

Make a new page just for buying and selling. I did for a while because I didn't want family seeing. We were going through a hard patch and I was selling anything worth money.

That's so annoying!

yanbu. i would hate it.
do you have to continue communicating with her by facebook? cant you whatsapp or email?

Start posting looking for 'used fetish wear', 'open minded local couples' or 'directions to secluded beauty spots suitable for parking several cars unnoticed at night'.

That will really give her something to talk about!

wow, how annoying for you! I agree in the setting up of a new page for buying and selling. It's annoying as it's a hassle for you based on someone else's behaviour, but it will just nip it in the bud.

I have considered starting a new profile for buying/selling but won't people be suspicious of me? No friends etc would send alarm bells ringing in my head!