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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this is a bad driving instructor?

26 replies

NamechangingforMay · 29/05/2017 19:09

He has a business on the side and he has to deliver things to his clients (just these wood make things) and he does that when he's out with DD! Is that even professional? He took her on the main road to a different town and even apologised and said he doesn't like lessons to be just on a main road but he needs to get a model to a client. He gets out and drops it off, leaving DD in the car for 10 mins - and DD is paying for all this!!

Also really unhappy with "how old is your dad?" And DD says and he says "oh I'm old enough to be your dad I won't say what I was going to say then".

He's also frequently telling her that she is doing a rubbish job (please tell me not all instructors are like that!? I can't drive so have no idea).

DD has told me not to worry but it's not right is it?

OP posts:
catgirl1976 · 29/05/2017 19:12

That is appalling on so many levels.

Get her to get a new one now!

GeillisTheWitch · 29/05/2017 19:12

He is shit. I'd be finding a new instructor. Leaving DD in the car for ten minutes of her lesson time is seriously taking the piss. He sounds like a creep too.

QueenMortificado · 29/05/2017 19:15

Get to BSM or AA. Pronto.

Pinkheart5917 · 29/05/2017 19:15

No it's not right.

The fact is a lot of learner drivers are young women (& men) and he shouldn't be making those comments to anyone.

No I don't Remember my driving teacher telling me I was doing rubbish, how will that help ones confidence??

No delivery parcels or whatever while teaching is not on, you want your money's worth from lessons!

I don't think you can complain though, if your dd is old enough to drive she is old enough to decide if she wants to complain or anything.

You could however suggest to her that she looks for a different teacher??

NamechangingforMay · 29/05/2017 19:18

@Pinkheart5917 actually, it's funny because all the lessons have been booked through me. It's really common amongst the 17 yos and the company wanted to speak to me too.

Thanks all, it's a really respected company which is why I'm so shocked.

OP posts:
rightsaidfrederickII · 29/05/2017 19:19

He's.... another level of awful. Get shot. Pronto.

DonaldStott · 29/05/2017 19:24

I had a crap driving instructor who was with AA.

Ended up snogging one of my driving instructors Blush, but I was very young and when I think about it now, it was so wrong of him.

I would ask for recommendations on facebook or something.

StarryCorpulentCunt · 29/05/2017 19:25

He sounds crap tbh. My driving instructor used to get me to pick up her kids sometimes and drop things off but she always let lessons run over if she did that so that I was getting all the time I paid for. It was actually good for me as I got used to driving with distractions in the back and parking in different places but this guy sounds awful. He is inappropriate and knocking her confidence. Ditch him and find someone better.

BertieBotts · 29/05/2017 19:25

No, that's rubbish and a bit alarming TBH.

Actually having just wasted about six months and a lot of money with a crap driving instructor I would definitely suggest she looks around for another one. It's not cheap to learn to drive. Someone who gives good feedback, helps her feel like her confidence is increasing and gives her a good sense of how she can improve is what she should look for.

BertieBotts · 29/05/2017 19:27

I know I stuck with mine for ages because I was worried about someone else being worse, I didn't want to "upset" him by leaving (silly! It's just a job to them) and I was worried about all the hassle of looking for another instructor - it actually ended up being really easy and I liked my new one until I injured myself and wasn't able to drive for a couple of months. I need to get sorted with going back to her.

Beeziekn33ze · 29/05/2017 19:29

OP - He's useless. Report him to the company and ask for a refund!

BertieBotts · 29/05/2017 19:30

I would def recommend a female instructor by the way. I'm sure not all male ones are gross and inappropriate but it seems a common trait especially when they are older.

For a nice role model of a lovely calming male instructor get her to watch the videos from this youtube channel. www.youtube.com/channel/UCPwt-gLXAMMVVne6TFyCDFA

That's what an instructor should be like.

BromptonCocktail · 29/05/2017 19:32

Ugh. I had a driving instructor when I was 17 who told me to pretend the gearstick was my boyfriend and not to yank it around he also implored me to 'stroke the clutch very gently....' Absolute creep and put me off driving. Worse still, my dad didn't believe me and said I was a shirker. If a child of mine faced that now I'd be very angry and report them to whoever licenses driving instructors.

OriginalArchitect · 29/05/2017 19:49

Absolutely, get rid!
I had a brilliant instructor - only been driving a few years. He never said I was rubbish, even when I really was... and I failed two tests through nerves, nothing to do with his teaching. When I was rear ended on a driving lesson by a mad woman in her husbands Volvo into oncoming traffic he was the epitome of calm but firm, talking me through how to turn around and get to a safe place. He never once made a single inappropriate or offensive comment, apart from the shocked "fucking hell!" as the volvo bumper crumpled the rear of his car. I still see him ocassionally, he always waves. I would reccommend him to anyone!

billabye · 29/05/2017 19:52

I'm a driving instructor and have heard of similar horror stories. It's appalling and you need to find someone else asap.

I'd go for an independant instructor as they are generally good enough that they don't need to be paying franchise fees to a large driving school as they get work from having a good reputation. Ask people you know for recommendations.

billabye · 29/05/2017 19:56

Also, don't go with the cheap ones. You tend to get what you pay for. Cheap hourly rate usually means more expensive in the long run because you pay for more lessons.

NamechangingforMay · 29/05/2017 20:03

He was one of the most expensive around, so I suppose I can't take that advice Grin also just asked someone and they recommend someone who is with a company Grin

OP posts:
billabye · 29/05/2017 21:23

Try one of the recommended ones that's with a company then. Can't be much worse than the one she's got.

AngryGinger · 29/05/2017 21:37

Terrible!! My driving instructor asked me 3 or 4 times to take him to pick something up but he built it into my lessons, so we would take the roads that might come up in my test and he'd add the time we took at the place on to the end of my lesson. I think he asked cos he knew I didn't mind, I liked it in a way as it felt like I wasn't just driving round aimlessly. Saying that, my driving instructor was probably only a few years older than me so he was effectively my peer.

onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad · 29/05/2017 21:51

Change driving instructors and report him to the driving and vehicle standards agency.

alfagirl73 · 29/05/2017 22:24

That's terrible! Get a new instructor - definitely. He sounds unprofessional and sadly one of those awful instructors who takes advantage of the fact he has young, nervous, female students who probably won't question him or pull him up on his conduct. There are far too many instructors out there like that.

Look for a better instructor who will boost your daughter's confidence and focus on making her a better driver - not on his other business or on making inappropriate comments.

Oysterbabe · 29/05/2017 22:37

My driving instructor used to give me a smack on the thigh when I messed up and would talk to me about his sex life. Obviously he was shady as fuck but I didn't think much of it when I was 17.
Get a new one I reckon.

tiredplusstressed · 08/08/2017 09:34

Try an automatic car and have trial sessions with different instructors until you feel comfortable with one.
I was absolutely terrible too, I think I got through 7 or 8 instructors over the years. I'm not generally pathetic but most of them made me cry.
I found that instructors who set up on their own were best and most understanding. I passed last year, if I can do it anyone can.

NamasteTheFuckAwayFromMe · 08/08/2017 09:41

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NamasteTheFuckAwayFromMe · 08/08/2017 09:41

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