To ask how you would split this "fun" money?

[Newdad19]

Its payday this weekend, all bills (including groceries etc) covered and we have set aside £600 for "fun/going out" money for DW and I.

How would you split this? Just keep it as a full £600 and use as we need? Give £300 each so its halved and then each feels like they have their "own" money? Or maybe £200 each and £200 general money?

This is money to cover general spending on entertainment/coffees/meals out/makeup/clothes etc that we see fit over the course of the month.

Looking for how others do this as the last months we have tried just keeping it as one sum but it often feels like we dont have our own money. Im worried that if we split it though then it can quickly get into who pays for what which is not how we want to operate either .

Thanks

£200 each for own money and then £200 for joint expenses then you still have the option of doing things together and no stress in who pays for what

If it's a joint account you have I'd just leave the 600 in there and use as needed - as long as you both have the self control to only use a "fair" amount (ie one of you isn't going to go and spend £500 in a day for the sake of it) if not, or you have seperate accounts id do £200 each and then £200 left over for if either of you need/want anything or anything unexpected pops up

Good lunch with drinks & keep £200 each

DH and I have an 'allowance' each which goes into our own personal account for our own use - books, clothes, days out with our own friends etc. we have a similar amount left in the joint account for trips out together/with the kids. it's important to have a bit of our own money that we dont have to worry about spending/being fair with. if we want to spend our entire allowance on tat then we can!!

Definitely no issue with self control. If anything its probably the opposite.

For full disclosure DW is on maternity with DC2 who was born last week and I have been the main earner since she returned to work part time from DC1. This works great for us but when its kept in the joint account I think she somtimes feels reluctant just to spend on what she needs (makeup/clothes etc). This is despite me telling her all the time the money is just as much hers and is there to be spent, so im trying to think of a way we can still control the finances but make it feel like she has more of her own money ifyswim?

Save some? Overpay mortgage?

From your last post I would say £200 each and £200 in a joint pot for meals out/family outings.

Monthly expenses are covered including savings and overpayments we wish to make. This is money we have aside for own monthly entertainment.

In that case I'd split it more 'specifically', eg £150 each that must only be spent on stuff/activities for yourself and £300 for going out, meals or whatever.

I quite like the idea of that actually Stress, then we both have seperate money which is solely for our own and doesnt need to be a whos paid for what, but enough centrally for trully joint expenses.

I'd agree with Stress. I'd give £150 each for you and DW to spend on what you like (clothes, going out etc) and £300 to do fun stuff together as a couple.

Pretends not to be jealous you have £600 each month just for fun stuff

Haha KitKat I didnt want this to come across as a stealth boast or anything either it was a genuine as I have heard alot of people on here talk about their own "allowance" etc and its something we have never done.

I also remeber from the "how much disposable income do you have?" Thread that £600 was probably on the lower side of what most people had!

I would possibly do 4 pots. One each, one for the family and one for DW to entertain the dc during the week. Playgroups, soft play etc can add up over the month. Or give DW a larger share if you only want 3 pots. Sorry if this is covered in your budget elsewhere, it was a bone of contention for a while in our household.

Treat "entertainment" as another allocated expense, and work out what that is - what it's for, and how much. e.g. £200 to spend on food out and cinema. Leave it in same pot as mortgage etc.
Split the rest between you.

I would just shove it into savings unless I had mortgage debt in which case I'd pay off that. You never know what will happen in the future so having money set aside is probably better than spending £600 on going out. Or give each child half of it. We have saved up every penny our children have been given and when the youngest go to university this year they have a little pot of money which will come in very handy.

Definitely give her £150 and say she must spend it on herself. If she's anything like me she'll spend it on the kids!

Make sure to organise some family lunches out etc too which comes out of the joint spends.

We work ours out so I get £15 a day and DH gets £10 a day. Don't know why but we always work in days rather than months or weeks. I get more as I pay for kids school money trips/snack/donations etc.

This works great for us but when its kept in the joint account I think she somtimes feels reluctant just to spend on what she needs (makeup/clothes etc).

You think? Have you discussed it?

Our disposable income is quite small but it stays in the joint account and we both just use it when we need/want to. We run big purchases past each other but that's all.

But you can't insist someone spends money on themselves. As long as she knows it's there if she needs it I don't see the problem

To be clear, this isnt money we are just frittling away. As someone else said, it adds up with DC2 with various classes etc, DW going out for the odd lunch with friends, new clothes for kids, haircuts, DW needing new bras etc after birth.

We already have money aside for the kids and savings, this is what we are spending on other general expenses.

Thanks for the suggestions, I think we will try 2x£150 exclusive expenses and £300 family this month.

We do this and split it four ways as pirate mentioned - one each for DH and I, one joint and one for DC stuff. With your £600, I would probably do £150 for each of you, £200 joint and £100 for DC. Our DC pot is larger because they are older.

For the money for children activities, work out what the expenses for that would be in an average month. If she's just had a baby, I doubt she'd want to do anything strenuous, but estimate the cost of soft play entry, toddler group etc. Then add an extra 10% to that (if she wants coffee whilst there, in case she wants to go a bit more than usual). Give your wife the £150-200 (whatever you agree on) PLUS this amount, if she's the one paying for these things usually.

You should also give yourself money if you have expenses relating to you ie commuting expenses, lunch, cost of new work clothes (suits are expensive), if they don't already come out of a joint pot.

If you'd get bitter about who paid for what, make sure everything is already completely fair before allocating fun money.

@nokidshere

The "works great for us" comment was in regards to our working setup in that I am the main earner whilst DW is on maternity from her pt job. Yes this is the case and is obviously something that has been discussed.

Im also not insisting anyone spends money on themselves, if one month she doesnt need to spend the full amount then that's fine. It's more just a case of allowing us to have a joint pool of money to be shared for family expenses whilst having your own pot of money to do what you wish with.

Isnt that what most women on MN actually advise on here in that you should always have some finances for yourself seperate from the joint anyway?

Anyway, thanks again we have got the solution for this month to try

£150 each and £300 for savings/ Christmas/emergency fund you never know when the car will break down etc

How much are you saving? I'd save more to be honest and have £200 each.

Emergency fund, savings are covered.

Appreciate the suggestions but this was more to ask how people would split their "pocket money" not about how much that actually is.

You could almost forget the £600 value and replace it with whatever.