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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Day off work because of period

21 replies

Happyhappyveggie · 15/05/2017 06:37

I'm 44 and my periods since having my kids have got worse and worse. I think I am going into peri-menopause too. Periods are very heavy, awful cramps, heart palpitations and anxiety. I also can't stop crying for a couple days before they start.
I am finding them overwhelming and slightly unmanageable- I am going to see the doctor about what to do.
But Aibu to take a day off work with my symptoms - I genuinely don't feel fit to go to work, partly because of the heaviness of my periods, partly because of the awful pains but also because of the effect it has on my mental health- I am a wreck and don't feel fit for work. I'll be fine once the hormone storm has passed.
Aibu?

OP posts:

tinydancer88 · 15/05/2017 06:39

If you're not fit to work you' shouldn't go in.

I've taken days off because of bad periods before, not every month (I'm on the pill so can skip periods, and for some reason some months I just feel under the weather and some I'm a total mess, so it's probably a max of 2 days sick a year), but if I'm in loads of pain, feeling/being sick, anxious, unable to sleep and feeling faint, I'm no good at work.

Jimcanna · 15/05/2017 06:40

Take a day off. I nearly did with my last one. Agony and misery.

But get to the doctor soon, it doesn't have to be like this.

PookieDo · 15/05/2017 06:40

I've had to take days off when it is difficult to manage so you have my sympathy. Currently waiting for ablation surgery.
YANBU

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser · 15/05/2017 06:41

Of course you are not being unreasonable. If you're too ill to work then it doesn't matter what the cause is (barring hangovers etc.).

Make sure you go to the doctor though, and don't let them fob you off. Sometimes there is an attitude that you should just put up with it, but if you are suffering then there are things that can be done.

Hope you feel better soon

Wando1986 · 15/05/2017 06:41

Ibuprofen regularly from 24hrs before your period is due and then Ibuprofen lysiene when you come on makes a whole world of difference to the pain. It made my life liveable again rather than 3 weeks of intermittent torment.

christinarossetti · 15/05/2017 06:46

You're not well enough to go to work, so yes definitely don't go in.

I hate the way we tend to trivialise and minimise women's well-being and health around periods and the menopause

MackerelOfFact · 15/05/2017 06:48

YANBU. Dysmenorrhoea is a real and chronic condition - just because you're a woman and it happens monthly doesn't make it any less legitimate.

Do definitely see the doctor though. Hope you feel better soon.

tinydancer88 · 15/05/2017 06:48

My GP advised me to take painkillers from the day before I'm due on and also to take Buscopan to relieve cramps - my face was but actually has really helped the cramping pains and diarrhea I used to have every single time.

Firefries · 15/05/2017 06:49

Yes take a day off, of course. The heavy bleeding and pain is stressful and you shouldn't have to deal with it at work. Go to your doctor and ask for progesterone. I was in a similar position and it was suggested my estrogen levels were probably getting too high or imbalanced from the change. This changed everything. And I went on multi vits for iron as my levels of iron got very low. I noticed a difference very quickly. I hope you get help. Don't just suffer it. Oh and that hormone storm you mention? It could come and go for many years so don't accept it as normal or something you have to endure.

AlpacaLypse · 15/05/2017 06:50

Of course take day off. Putting boss hat on, I need people who are fit for purpose and it doesn't sound like you are today! And strop at your doctor until you get some decent meds. Tranexamic acid is absolutely wonderful stuff for me for the physical effects.

BalloonSlayer · 15/05/2017 06:57

Take a day off of course. You obviously need to.

And then USE this. Make sure you tell your GP - "it is so bad I am unable to go to work some days, this is impacting my life/my work" etc, it will make him/her take it more seriously.

Yogagirl123 · 15/05/2017 07:11

Hope you are feeling better soon, I am a similar age I was having terrible problems with my periods a few years back, GP recommended Mirena Coil on my second one now and not looked back, no periods, it's been great for me. I wouldn't say it has completely eliminated the hormonal mood swings completely (I have MS so that can contribute to mood swings also) but much better to be rid of the heavy bleeding that was so debilitating. Have the day off and see your GP when you feel a little better I am sure they will be a solution for you and that will improve your life.

neighbourhoodwitch · 15/05/2017 07:17

God not at all U. Poor you. These symptoms should be taken very seriously. I hope you feel better soon and it passes soon.

LaLegue · 15/05/2017 07:27

You are absolutely NBU to take the day off. You are unwell. The reason is irrelevant. Just because some people can carry on as usual through a period doesn't mean everyone can, and as you are finding out, these things can change or worsen with age.

But if you are finding this is happening to you regularly you really should see your GP. It's not something you should have to suffer 'just because it's a period and periods are normal' any more than bad migraines or any other illness that stops you working and getting on with your life.

strikhedonia · 15/05/2017 07:38

It does sound like a silly reason, but it's a crippling condition. When you are doubled up in pain and throwing up because of it, you are not in any condition to work.

Use a hot water bottle - but don't burn yourself! Go and see your GP to find a solution, it's hell.

CormorantDevouringTime · 15/05/2017 07:42

Poor thing. Definitely take a day off, but get to the doctor and find a solution because a day or two off every month isn't going to be sustainable.

BishopBrennansArse · 15/05/2017 07:45

I've had periods that bad. Now have Mirena and thankfully it works well for me. So YANBU and good luck getting it sorted.

Beerwench · 15/05/2017 07:53

Keep a diary of all your symptoms, mental and physical. I have long suspected that my anxiety and depression was much worse in the few days before my period. On the rare occasions I don't become an unreasonable, crying, anxious mess before a period I usually end up have dreams that make me cry or terrify me.
I'm back at square one after having a lovely doctor actually listen for once, now I've moved I have a (female!) Doc who is of the opinion unless your uterus falls out on to the carpet, every woman has to go through it and actually I'm depressed and blaming it on PMT - not interested that I only get physical symptoms around my period, that the bleeding has gotten much heavier and the behavior and mental health issues are a cycle. I've changed doctors and am keeping a 3 month diary again. Hopefully I'll get somewhere.
Good luck. It's awful and if you're too unwell to work then no, you are not being U to have the day off.

neighbourhoodwitch · 25/08/2017 10:32

Not at all U. Hope it passes soon.

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 25/08/2017 10:37

You are not being unreasonable

Stay at home, hot water bottle, pain killers, chocolate some nice comforting drinks and someething sad on the telly so you can get all your crying out

tehmina23 · 25/08/2017 10:40

Speak to your gp about Cezarette (one of the contraceptive Pills aimed at over 35s).

I used to get terrible pmt but Cezarette has stopped my periods and it's great!

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