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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WWYD Childminder vs nursery

18 replies

Oldbrownowl · 27/03/2017 13:40

Hi,

More a wwyd than AIBU but I just wanted some advice, my ds is currently at a childminder fulltime, he loves it there and has really thrived. With the 30 hours childcare coming in, we could afford to send him to a nursery which my dh really wants to do. He thinks it will be better for him when he starts school to have been to nursery and be an easier transition.

I don't really want him to go, I think that he's settled and thriving where he is, that he will be in schools for the next 16 years that it is nice for him to be in a home environment until he starts school.

I am worried about the settling into school thing but if he doesn't settle at nursery, then a year later another big change, could be far worse for him.

What do people think? We are at a standstill so other peoples opinions would really help.

OP posts:

glenthebattleostrich · 27/03/2017 13:41

I'd see if you can split the hours between a school nursery and a childminder. As a childminder I'll be offering wrap around hours.

Original poster

Oldbrownowl · 27/03/2017 13:44

The problem with that is my current childminder doesn't do nursery/school pick up, and I am working full time and wouldn't be able to pick him up and drop him to childminder, so it needs to be one or the other as I wouldn't want to change cm and nursery.

OP posts:

Yukbuck · 27/03/2017 13:45

I'd stay with the childminder if you can. Will she be offering some of the free hours?
(Just an FYI the 30 hours that the government are offering is going to start putting childcare. Out of business as they basically pay the child care giver peanuts so they end up working at a loss)

TheThickenPlots · 27/03/2017 13:47

My ds goes to a fabulous childminder too, 4 days a week. When he is 3 he will do 3 mornings at the local preschool (the cm will drop him off and pick him up). We did the same with my daughter, it worked well for her and she transitioned to school with no problems. I think a full day at nursery is a bit much at that age, but I do know people who have used them successfully. I think my kids have benefited from the home from home environment of the cm, she treats them like part of the family.

Doglikeafox · 27/03/2017 13:49

I think it would be really silly to uproot him from somewhere he is perfectly happy and settled.
Any good childminder will be able to prepare your son for school. He will be attending play groups/ play sessions with other childminders doing organised activities like he would at school. They should be reading books together about preparing for school, what it entails, chatting about making friends etc etc. She (and you) will be preparing him in terms of getting him physically ready e.g. Attending to his own toileting needs, using cutlery, sitting at the table to eat a meal.
A child with a happy, consistent relationship with a childminder is going to be far more 'school-ready' than a child who has been uprooted from one setting to another, only to be uprooted again when starting school.

Original poster

Oldbrownowl · 27/03/2017 13:49

My childminder does the 15 hours free at the moment, I know that the 30 hours might be a stretch for her so if we decided to keep him there, we were thinking of offering her the difference, so she wouldn't lose money and we would still end up saving money.

OP posts:

Original poster

Oldbrownowl · 27/03/2017 13:50

thanks dog that was my feeling and why I don't want to uproot him twice in a year.

OP posts:

thisgirlrides · 27/03/2017 13:51

How old is he? If he's due to start school in September and the financial cost saving will make. Difference then I'd consider nursery but if he's got another 18mths + until school or moment isn't an issue, I'd stick with the cm.
I'm a cm and have a mixture of children only with me, some doing both nursery & with me and other who leave me for nursery when they get funding (I don't offer funding anymore due to pay discrepancy) and I honestly don't think any one has fared better (or worse) for their childcare. I socialise with my mindees (playgroups, get-togethers etc) and we get out & about in the community most days so I really wouldn't worry in that respect.

TheThickenPlots · 27/03/2017 13:52

Just seen your update, that does make it harder. Does your cm take them to groups? If he's getting out and socialising I'd be inclined to stick with the cm as he's happy.
We get round the government paying peanuts for the free hours by paying extra for food that is usually included and paying the hourly rate for non included hours (which is more per hour than the daily rate if that makes sense!). Why should my cm be paid less for the same work so I can benefit?

Soubriquet · 27/03/2017 13:55

Is there any nurseries who are small?

My Ds is starting a nursery really soon and it's in a converted bungalow. There are only about 10 children at a time there and the outdoor space is huge, so it's like a home away from home nursery.

I'm really nervous about him starting but I think it will do him a world of good.

If there is nothing like that, I would leave him where he is. He is settled and happy. Why upset the balance

littledinaco · 27/03/2017 13:56

I would stick with the childminder. I know quite a few children who transitioned from childminder or no childcare at all straight to school with no problems.

I also know one child who really struggled going into reception despite being in nursery for several years. There is no way to guarantee settling into school unfortunately.

If the transition to school is going to be an issue for your DS, then I would guess the transition from childminder to nursery would be even harder as he'll be a lot younger and less able to cope.

If he is happy where he is, I wouldn't change that.

OverOn · 27/03/2017 13:57

If your son is settled I'd leave him with CM, assuming she takes him to playgroup and he socialises with other DC.

icclemunchy · 27/03/2017 13:58

We left our eldest the with cm. she took to school like a duck to water. Indeed far better than some of this children who went to the school nursery who seemed to struggle with the fact they suddenly had to be there all day (I appreciate this was just a few particular children and is just my observation)

chillipopcorn1 · 27/03/2017 14:00

My MIL is an early years specialist and worked for her LEA for decades inspecting nurseries. She would 100% recommend a childminder over nursery for most children and feels quite strongly about it. She says children thrive more in home environments for as long as possible - your child will have 12 years in an institutional setting (I say this as a primary school teacher!) so having that 1 caregiver is so important at this stage.

LoriD · 27/03/2017 14:27

I was hesitant putting my child into a nursery but now I see it's one of he best things I could have done for her. She is in a nursery with small numbers and they provide structured activities day in and out. She had learned so much in the nursery and her speech has come on so well. I think the socialisation is fantastic also she loves it so much that she runs into the room each day.

I have one on one care for her at the beginning with a cm but I think the nursery was the best decision as she's an outgoing child and loves other children

Original poster

Oldbrownowl · 27/03/2017 14:42

He would get the 30 hours from this September but wouldn't start school until Sep 18.

We wouldn't want our cm to be out of pocket either which is why we would suggest making up the short fall, so she doesn't lose money and we would still pay less than we do currently.

Unfortunately we are really struggling financially with the cm costs, so we couldn't afford to not take the hours.

It's good to see a lot of people agree with staying at the cm, as he does love it there and there are 2 other full time children and then groups etc. He has learnt loads and is really coming along.

I'll show DH the thread and hopefully he is more in agreement re staying put.

OP posts:

PeaFaceMcgee · 27/03/2017 14:46

Yanbu. Ours was with a childminder until she began school after her 5th birthday. Two terms in reception before Y1 was plenty enough time to adapt to school life and she loves it now.

rookiemere · 27/03/2017 15:40

DS loved his CM until he got to around 4 when he wanted to do more and she had other younger children as well so he found it a bit restrictive. However if your DS is still enjoying it then I wouldn't be in a rush to move him.

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