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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DHs Birthday Surprise AIBU

6 replies

singme · 30/01/2017 20:37

It's a big birthday for DH this weekend. We live far away from a lot of our friends, who all live near each other. A few months ago I asked around about people coming to see us and nobody really could, but some arranged another time to come. My plan B was that we would head to their city for the weekend and have a big dinner together, but then DH had to go there for work anyway the weekend just gone, so I assumed he wouldn't want to go two weeks in a row. There was a show he wanted to see but it all sold out before I could get tickets. So I've panicked booked a weekend away somewhere really cool, just the two of us. Tonight he mentioned about heading to see our friends this weekend and I think that's actually what he wanted to do all along. I can't really cancel our weekend away now can I? I'd lose almost all the money. Should I just ride it out?! I feel that he's going to be disappointed, but at the same time he's a grown man who usually doesn't care about birthdays, so he should just get over it right?!

OP posts:
Crispbutty · 30/01/2017 20:39

If he doesn't know you have planned anything then maybe he's just trying to sort something as he thinks nothing special is happening.
Just tell him you have something planned, but it's a surprise.

MissVictoria · 30/01/2017 20:40

What you've done is a lovely thing, and he can always go and visit friends next week. Try not to stress, i'm sure he'll love and appreciate that you've made such an effort, and with them living close enough a weekend visit is possible it's not like he's missing out a rare oppertunity to visit.

Chloe84 · 30/01/2017 20:42

You're not going to be able to arrange dinner with his friends with one week's notice.

Just tell him you have a surprise for him but it just involves the two of you. Don't cancel the weekend away.

AlpacaLypse · 30/01/2017 20:45

Just be fairly truthful and tell him not to make plans for next weekend. And meanwhile keep in touch with the old friends mob for something big later in the year.

My birthday is the weekend after next - I've come up with an ongoing plan of having something with my local friends each year on the weekend nearest my birthday, and a bit of a blast in summer with all the university etc friends who live miles or indeed continents away.

AlpacaLypse · 30/01/2017 20:47

Forgot to say this has worked so far with not one but two Significant Birthdays that have a zero on the end!

singme · 30/01/2017 22:47

Thanks all. Feel a bit better about it now! Can't shake the feeling that the two things he wanted to do I've failed to organise! But there's other weekends! We don't usually do much for birthdays so this has been an unexpected stress! Smile

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