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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

to ask the housing association about moving us?

19 replies

Hewmus · 21/01/2017 19:36

DH is a prison officer. Neighbour has just told me another neighbour is in the same prison DH works in. Would you expect the housing association to move us? Imprisoned neighbour would definitely know DH, knows car and knows we have young children etc.

OP posts:

chocdonutyy · 21/01/2017 19:39

If he's in prison then he's not your neighbour, can't be in two places at once or is he due out soon?
There are schemes like home swapper etc where you arrange a swap with another ha/council tenant, might be worth a look

DJBaggySmalls · 21/01/2017 19:40

There's no harm in asking them, but you might have to look at an exchange as well.

FishInAWetSuitAndFlippers · 21/01/2017 19:42

I don't think they would move you unless something happened.

You could always look for a house swap, there are loads of sites for them. I think Facebook is good for house swap sites.

DeathStare · 21/01/2017 19:42

So the neighbour will already have seen your DH and would recognise him? If so I'd expect his employer to ensure they are kept apart.

Could the neighbour know he is a prison officer at the same prison? If so then yes I'd ask the HA about moving if it makes you feel uncomfortable

FoofFighter · 21/01/2017 19:43

Tough one, but you cannot realistically move each time you come into contact with someone from the prison surely?

WatchingFromTheWings · 21/01/2017 19:44

No harm in asking. Give them a call, see what they say.

Original poster

Hewmus · 21/01/2017 19:45

choc he's inside now, but was our neighbour at time of arrest etc. Therefore he knows our address. I'm most concerned about him sharing our information.

There's so many people around here trying to swap but who want to swap their 1 bed flat for 3 bed house etc.

OP posts:

Allthebestnamesareused · 21/01/2017 19:47

I know of a police officer who got a school place at a different school because kids of people he had arrested were at the same school so it might be worth asking. If you don't ask you won't know.

OurMiracle1106 · 21/01/2017 19:48

Think it would depend on what they have done to be in prison firstly. If it's a non violent offence (such as fraud etc) I don't see there's any reason to move.

Prisoner may well have no bad feelings towards yourselves and no track record of harrasment then I doubt that the housing association would help you move.

Original poster

Hewmus · 21/01/2017 20:04

I'm concerned about him sharing our address with anyone else to gain favour for himself- surely sharing info on Screws is bound to help him out?

foof there's coming into contact with prisoners (which has happened, we've seen people in town etc) but this man knows where we live.

I'll get onto the HA on Monday. It's difficult for DH as he has to be careful re confidentiality etc.

OP posts:

Littlepeople12345 · 21/01/2017 20:08

I would get your DH to ring the HA. I don't think it's appropriate that you do it as it's his work and his information. Has your DH seen the neighbour at work?

Original poster

Hewmus · 21/01/2017 20:10

Another neighbour has told us, which avoids the confidentiality issue for DH.

OP posts:

SaucyJack · 21/01/2017 20:24

How big and far away is the prison? You can't move every time someone you vaguely know moves in, Shirley?

Just seems a bit drastic really. Assuming (big if) your DH is fair and just in his work, I really don't think his address will be anywhere near as interesting to other inmates as you fear it will be.

Akire · 21/01/2017 20:31

I doubt they would, I'm
Not sure how many assaults on prison staff occur outside prison a year. But surely it must be quite easy if you wanted to do someone harm to wait until they drive out of a prison At the end of their shift then Follow them home. Not exactly rocket science. Unless
You live miles and miles away from where you work you are bound to bump into odd person.

Original poster

Hewmus · 21/01/2017 20:40

I'm going to call them Monday and see what they say, it's worth an ask. I get you can't avoid seeing ex-inmates out and about, but knowing there's someone inside the prison that knows our exact address is making me nervous. saucyjack it's not exactly vaguely knows though, and don't call me Shirley!

OP posts:

chocolatespiders · 21/01/2017 20:42

Could your DH work in a different bit of the prison?

user1484317265 · 21/01/2017 20:45

I'm concerned about him sharing our address with anyone else to gain favour for himself- surely sharing info on Screws is bound to help him out?

Its really very easy to find out where anyone lives, so I doubt that information would be worth anything to anyone.

Slimmingsnake · 21/01/2017 21:09

Your dh needs to declare it to prison governor,and he can request to not work on the prisoners wing...usually in this situation they will be kept apart.but depends how things pan out..if you get on with the neighbors then there shouldn't be a problem

Original poster

Hewmus · 22/01/2017 13:16

He's done everything he needs to do wrt prison procedures etc, it's the fact he knows our address that's the issue. I'll call them tomorrow and see what they say. thanks everyone.

OP posts:

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