To throw myself a fabulous birthday party?

[Figure17a]

For my 50th.

I'm thinking along the lines of a wedding type reception with dinner followed by dancing. There's a place locally that does a drinks inclusive deal for about £50 a head. Lovely setting and a decent meal. I'm thinking maybe 200 people so, well you can do the sums!

I don't have 200 close friends! It would be people I know through my sport, current and ex colleagues, neighbours relatives I rarely see etc. An excuse to get people together.

We can afford it, but what's holding me back is that that would come as a surprise to most on the guest list. We live a quiet modest life and throwing a bash like this would be completely out of character.

It would also be (probably) out of the question for most of the guests so I worry about seeming flash.

So. Should I? Would you? What would you think if you got an invite? Will anyone turn up?!

Do it! I really wanted to throw a big party (not quite on the scale of yours ) for my 30th but I'm on mat leave and can't afford it. If you sent me an invite I'd definitely come I love a party

Yes it sounds wonderful. We should celebrate when we can on the scale we can afford and enjoy. You'll need to get invites out in good time due to the numbers and planning. I'll pm you my details

Go for it - turning 50 is a great reason to have a big party! I threw myself a party for my 40th - nowhere near as big as yours but it was a sit down mean for 30 people in a private dining room in a lovely location, and I booked singing waiters which got everyone up and dancing. I expect I'll throw myself a party for my 50th (in 9 years time) too. I like organising parties and am much better at that sort of thing than my husband.

I'm sure people will want to go to yours and be thrilled to get an invite!

Does a "quite and moderate life", include not traveling?

I personally wouldn't pay for acquaintances to party. I'm nearly 50 and there's still places I want to go and if I had that money, I would want a bit of luxury travel.

There's been so many deaths of people their 50's, ive been thinking that you don't know how long you've got to do things, mobility/health wise, as well.

Only you can decide if it's money well spent.

We've had some lovely holidays in recent years Birds and definitely spent more than we did/were able when dc were small but I'm not excited by travel. I want to be interested in seeing stuff and going places but reality is I'm not. Eg travelled hours to see the Pyramids but couldn't help feeling "ok I've seen them, what now?"

I threw myself a fab 50th 2 years ago for 100 people 3 course sit down do blacktie with a winter wonderland theme, free bar etc. People still say how great it was - or are they just being nice?

Am I right in saying you intend to foot the bill yourself? What a generous gesture.

Sounds lovely, but much like a wedding, I would find an excuse not to go if I didn't really know anyone. You say you don't have 200 close friends, but are groups within that 200 close friends with each other? The guest list I think will be key to whether this is a nice idea of not!

10k on a party for neighbours, rellies you rarely see and ex colleagues.

Feck that!!

I will be 50 in less than three weeks, and while I might come to your party if invited, I'm having nothing for mine

I will probably be working on the day (our rotas are done weekly) and I'm not bothered if I am or not

Don't get paid again til four days after my birthday so DD2 and I might go for a really simple pub lunch in town, as her birthday is four days before mine

I've told everyone no presents, and most people seem horrified by my no fuss, no celebration 50th. I just don't see why I have to celebrate being another year older!

I hope you have a lovely birthday though OP, and have a great party