Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Mum fell over today

29 replies

KinkyAfro · 04/01/2017 16:56

She was walking to the shops, tripped and fell right outside the supermarket. She's badly cut her knee, both hands and banged her face, has also really jolted her back. Unfortunately I am at work so she called a neighbour to come and get her but she told me that not one of the very many people around came to help her. She was so sad about this, as am I and I wonder what would make people not help when something like this happens.

Luckily she's OK and managed to pick herself up but what if she hadn't been able to, wonder how long she'd have lay there waiting for someone to help

OP posts:

londonpia · 04/01/2017 16:58

Your poor mum, that's awful. I hope she isn't too badly shaken. I can't believe no one stopped to see if she was ok, that's so sad.

MiddleClassProblem · 04/01/2017 16:58

AIBU about what?

You know people should have helped...

bumblingmum · 04/01/2017 16:59

I'm glad she's OK but how awful that no-one at least stopped to ask 'are you ok?'
Thank goodness she had a neighbour she could call on.

helpimitchy · 04/01/2017 16:59

People are so wrapped up in themselves these days

Hope she makes a good recovery.

Original poster

KinkyAfro · 04/01/2017 16:59

AIBU for expecting someone to help, I should've put that in my post, and questioning why they wouldn't

OP posts:

londonrach · 04/01/2017 17:01

Not long judging by what my patients tell me and what ive seen. You be amazed how quickly people come to help. Ideally you should cover the person with a coat and call am ambulance whilst talking to them. Sounds like your mother got herself up quickly. Might be an idea for your mother to get a quick once over at the gp. Hope shes better soon. X

Original poster

KinkyAfro · 04/01/2017 17:01

Exactly bumbling and help, she was so upset on the phone, and she was right outside a building site too, guys sat in and stood talking around their vans.

OP posts:

JsOtherHalf · 04/01/2017 17:04

My elderly father fell in public recently. People did come to help, and phone a relative on his behalf.

Original poster

KinkyAfro · 04/01/2017 17:04

She said it took her a good few minutes to get up and some people were less than a couple of feet from her....plenty of time to come and help or even ask if she was OK once she was up. Neighbour took her straight to the walk in as she'd banged her head, they kept her in for an hour to make sure she was OK and let her go home. Neighbour is staying with her until I get home but this bloody bus is stuck in traffic

OP posts:

fruitbats · 04/01/2017 17:09

There was a thread the other day about relatives falling and the general consensus was, that you shouldn't help them up but should wait for an ambulance because they may have damaged themselves in the fall, or you might hurt yourself helping. I would have just helped her up. I hope she's feeling a bit better

Topseyt · 04/01/2017 17:11

It was clear what the AIBU was even though you didn't put it in the OP.

I agree that people should have tried to help. It is sad that nobody did. I had a bad fall last February. I broke an arm badly and definitely could not have got up without help. Thankfully I did get it.

I do hope your Mum is better quickly. It is scary and knocks your confidence, as much as anything, as well as being very painful.

LivingInMidnight · 04/01/2017 17:17

fruitbats me too. I thought everyone would help until that thread.

angeldelightedme · 04/01/2017 17:17

I am astonished.Where on earth do you live? I have never seen anything like that!
I am not sure about not moving someone (unless of course you suspect spinal damage) Is that teh right thing to do? I think an elderly person could get very cold lying on the ground at this time of year waiting for an ambulance to decide to turn up.

TheCatsMother99 · 04/01/2017 17:19

I hope your mum makes a speedy recovery.

It saddens me that people don't go to help those who fall over. I know I would (and have done in the past) and just can't get my head around seeing someone fall and not doing anything.

I'm also another one who learnt to not help older people actually get up from a thread on here the other day, I've definitely done that before but probably will think twice about it next time for fear of doing them more damage or hurting myself. I would probably sit with them on the floor till help came though!

fruitbats · 04/01/2017 17:20

I was astonished. It was the majority view.

fruitbats · 04/01/2017 17:21

I'm sorry, but I would still try and help them up. You can usually get an indication of whether or not someone can be moved. Spinal injuries are pretty rare I think.

FrancisCrawford · 04/01/2017 17:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

KinkyAfro · 04/01/2017 17:26

I didn't know that either but I would have automatically gone to help, I think she was more upset that no-one asked if she was OK

OP posts:

trappedinsuburbia · 04/01/2017 17:31

Thats so sad, i've stopped my car and jumped out at least 3 times I can remember off the top of my head to help people who had fallen over, twice I had to phone for an ambulance, also when I was walking an elderly man fell and me and my then boyfriend helped him up and walked him home.
I just can't comprehend not helping someone it seems so cruel.

Waitingfordolly · 04/01/2017 17:35

My dad falls a lot and he's always had people try to help him recently though they haven't always been helpful in reality, but before he started to use a stick he was unsteady on his feet sometimes before falling and then he said sometimes people avoided him, he thought it was because it looked as though he was drunk.

Soubriquet · 04/01/2017 17:38

I wouldn't have been able to help her up due to my own bad back, but I would have made sure she was ok and called an ambulance if needed

I also walk by and leave them if they have a huge group of people helping. Too many helpers make things worse

passby · 04/01/2017 17:48

Hope your mum will be ok

Not everyone can help. I have a bad back so can't lift anyone. If I was on the way to a medical appointment, I wouldn't able to stop as if I missed it it would take several months to get a new one.

As long as someone helped, that is what matters.

Sometimes people have drank too much and that is why they have fallen over. I wouldn't help in that case.

I have helped some people but then they got really aggressive so I would be cautious about stepping in. I did call the police when someone was stabbed. There was no point me going to help as he was already surrounded by a big group of people.

Groovee · 04/01/2017 18:29

So sorry about your mum, hope she is ok. The same thing happened with my friend's mum. Numerous people stepped over her and didn't stop help despite her asking for help😢

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 18:32

It's unusual that people do not immediately stop what they are doing and offer help or ask if you are ok. Have seen them do this often. I have done it myself.

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 18:33

I cannot believe people can walk over or around someone who has fallen.

Flip

1 2