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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Leaving children alone

44 replies

Cuddlequeen · 30/08/2016 16:08

So following on from an article I read in the daily snail that many more parents than I thought leave their children alone I thought I would ask general opinion as dh has an interview tomorrow morning while I'm at work and he has suggested leaving ds's and dd at home as he will only be an hour. Ds is 10, dd8 and ds7, they are very good not destructive and very responsible for their ages but I'm just not sure Hmm

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 30/08/2016 16:10

How far away from them will you both be? Think for an hour that would be fine as long as they are happy with it.

DubiousCredentials · 30/08/2016 16:12

I have a nearly ten yr old and a 7yr old and I wouldn't purely based on the fact that the 7yr old wouldn't like it.

Original poster
Cuddlequeen · 30/08/2016 16:13

I will be best part of an hour away and on mandatory training, dh will be 20mins have his phone on constantly and not afraid to speed home if needed. Part of me rationalises that it's a short amount of time and I do trust them, the other part is anxious and wants to wrap them up in cotton wool Blush

OP posts:
Ankleswingers · 30/08/2016 16:13

I wouldn't leave them but that's me. Anything could happen in an hour. 7 is too young IMO.

pieceofpurplesky · 30/08/2016 16:18

No. They are too young. Ten is far too young to be responsible for two other children which is what you are asking him to be.

Armi · 30/08/2016 16:20

I wouldn't. They are children and need to have someone to look after them.

LadyBaelish · 30/08/2016 16:21

Just a 10 year old I might if they were sensible but I wouldn't be happy leaving them 'in charge' of two other children.

Hoppinggreen · 30/08/2016 16:21

I occasionally leave my very sensible 11 year old on her own for short periods.
However, I take the 7 year old with me because it's not fair on his sister to be responsible for him

RJnomore1 · 30/08/2016 16:22

I would say it's unfair on your ten year old, and I don't believe your dh is happy to leave his phone on and run out of an interview- he would be as well not going really?

Karoleann · 30/08/2016 16:23

No, I wouldn't - I have a 10yo and an 8yo, I've just started leaving the 10 year old for up to an hour max, but I wouldn't leave him with the 8 year old, even though he's very sensible.

GoldFishFingerz · 30/08/2016 16:23

Ten is far too young to be babysitting siblings. The ten year old would be fine on her own for an hour but it's too much to expect her to take charge of two younger ones. Wait till she is 12 or 13

RebelRogue · 30/08/2016 16:23

It would depend on their personalities,capabilities and whether they would be happy with it or not. We don't know your kids so we can't judge. I'd have no issues of leaving mine though

timeforabrewnow · 30/08/2016 16:24

Nope. Too young.

Rowgtfc72 · 30/08/2016 16:25

Dd is nine and a half and this summer she's been home alone for the hour between dh going to work and me coming home.
She has a key, phone numbers and neighbours are aware.
I'm lucky however that I have a sensible nine year old, I wouldn't leave a lot of her friends alone for more than five mins. Nor would I leave her with another child.

Natsku · 30/08/2016 16:25

I would if they get on well together (so not likely to start fighting the moment mum and dad are gone) and they have a phone they can use to call you if needed and preferably a number of a trusted friend or neighbour they can also call if needed. And they know how to call 999 etc.

meowli · 30/08/2016 16:30

Do you have another option?

Oblomov16 · 30/08/2016 16:41

I agree.
When ds1 was 10 he was fine to leave for a short time. But asking him to be responsible for ds2 is too much.

OpenMe · 30/08/2016 16:43

Agree with others. I might leave the ten yo but I wouldn't leave a ten yo in charge if younger dc.

Witchend · 30/08/2016 16:45

No. I have a15, 12 & 9yo and I would only just leave the 12 and 9 together for a short time.

DramaAlpaca · 30/08/2016 16:48

I'm sorry, but I think they are too young.

iklboo · 30/08/2016 16:49

DS is a very sensible 10 and we've just started leaving him for quick journeys like nipping to the shops (15 mins max).

BertrandRussell · 30/08/2016 16:55

If they were happy with it, I'd do it. But only if they were happy with it. I would probably spend some time tonight choosing a film for them to watch together, and buy some sort of treat-y snacks so they won't even leave the sofa!

bloodyteenagers · 30/08/2016 16:58

I sometimes leave my 10 year old. We often chat on the phone as I walk home. He also knows he can contact a neighbour. At 7 no. And I wouldn't leave him with a younger child.

bringonyourwreckingball · 30/08/2016 17:01

I would leave (have left) my 10 year old but not the 8 year old even though she is very sensible. I think 8 is too young, and 10 is too young to be responsible for a sibling.

pontificationcentral · 30/08/2016 17:02

We have done this once the oldest got to 12, however she is mucho sensible we did not, however, leave the youngest two on their own together once middle kid got to 12, as he was nowhere near as sensible/ reliable. He could stay on his own, but not be in charge of the youngest.
I might have done it for 10-15 minutes earlier, but not for an hour where it would take at least 20 minutes to get home. Too many variables. It would probably be absolutely fine, but equally someone might get a bright idea to be helpful and make a sandwich and chop their finger off.
That said, we just left them overnight for the first time at 16/14/12. I was out of cell phone signal in the back country and dh was a 9 hour flight away. Hooray!

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