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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Reluctant reader- aibu to be worried?

43 replies

Kiddiewinks2008 · 03/07/2016 09:24

DS is 8.5 and a reluctant reader- school have been useless with helping me help him.
He likes me reading to him & we are currently reading secret 7 books by enid blyton. He reads a page & then I read a page & help him with tricky words- we do this every day.
I think what has made me worried is someone else was really surprised when I said he wasnt self reading as their ds of same age had read all these books by themselves a year ago at age 7.
I know kids develop at different stages but the school dont seem to be able to tell me if DS is progressing and keeping up- what is normal for an 8 year old reading wise?

OP posts:
99GBPChargeToUseMyPostsJournos · 03/07/2016 09:27

Maybe try different books? My son didn't enjoy reading until he found books that really gripped him - in his case it was the artemis fowl books. He would not have thanked me for Enid Blyton.

KyloRenNeedsTherapy · 03/07/2016 09:28

Ignore other people! Utter rubbish. A lot of 7 year olds wouldn't be able to read Secret 7 on their own - or if they did wouldn't necessarily understand much of it!

He sounds like he's doing fine - just keep encouraging him.

I'm a teacher btw, and a mum of a 7 yr old boy!

99GBPChargeToUseMyPostsJournos · 03/07/2016 09:30

Kylo, he is 8.5.

Witchend · 03/07/2016 09:31

Secret seven at that age is fine. Above average anyway, I think probably quite well above average.

They're harder than you expect-definitely harder than Beast,Quest and that lot.

If he's reluctant though, you might like to see if you can find something he enjoys more.

Original poster
Kiddiewinks2008 · 03/07/2016 09:31

He actually really likes Enid Blyton! And we just read all 12 of the cressida cowell books together which he loved- its just that he doesnt want to read himself- wants me to read to him!

OP posts:
Original poster
Kiddiewinks2008 · 03/07/2016 09:32

Will try different books though too!

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 03/07/2016 09:35

Please carry on reading to him for as long as he wants you to. Honestly, none of my kids are readers despite a house full of books, teacher parents and two of them learning to read really quickly and easily.
If he's enjoying his books he will read by himself when he wants to.

Ilovewillow · 03/07/2016 09:35

It sounds like he's doing well. My daughter, yr3 is a free reader and reads loads by herself but still likes me to read to her too! Perhaps it's the 1:1 time he loves!

99GBPChargeToUseMyPostsJournos · 03/07/2016 09:35

There's a difference between liking a book and getting sucked into one so much that you can't put it down. If he found books he loved he may well decide he can't wait for you to read with him.

Is just a thought though, he might just not be that interested. My daughter was an avid reader, my son not so much.

AuldYow · 03/07/2016 09:45

Maybe dig out some of his old more 'baby' books and ask him to read those to you. As in do you remember me reading these to you, can you read them to me?

He'll breeze through those them then progress onto more age appropriate.

My eldest DS started self reading at 4 he's always devoured books. Youngest DS had me tearing my hair out he wouldn't even read a page at 7/8, we went back to basics (I made out it was for me as I reminisced about the toddler books we had). Then we started going to the library every week, best decision ever he can chose his own books and now reads up to 2 a week his brother reads 4 or 5 some of the books he choses are bonkers but as long as he's reading it's up to him.

Stick with it OP he will get there.

Original poster
Kiddiewinks2008 · 03/07/2016 09:47

Thanks- I do try to get him reading books like Gruffalo etc to younger dd who is 4 and he likes doing that- its just very hard to keep his interest!

OP posts:
Manyshadesofblack · 03/07/2016 09:49

What do his teachers say about his reading? Is his writing and spelling ok? My son is 7 and loves Enid Blyton books but does not read them himself. I read to him and he will read the occasional page (very occasional). I would say that my son does have a reading difficulty. It sounds like your son is doing really well if he is reading every other page.

vvviola · 03/07/2016 09:53

DD1 was a bit of a reluctant self reader until this year (she'll be 9 soon). She just wasn't grabbed by the things we and the school were giving her (too much fairy princess for her liking). The she found the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books. Total conversion. And now it has spread to other books.

We had stopped reading to her at night for various reasons, but we've moved house recently and the new layout has meant reading to her at bedtime is easier - so we have two books on the go - one I read to her and one she reads afterwards. I've seen her self reading taking off in another boost since then.

Maybe you could do that - I'll read this book with you, and then you have ten minutes to read something you like?

(Also, when DD1 wasn't reading much herself, she did often read non-fiction, it just interested her more, although it was hard to find books with the right level of language. Maybe you could steer him towards so non-fiction in subjects that interest him?)

EllenJanethickerknickers · 03/07/2016 09:53

I carried on reading to my DS1 until he was 10 or 11. He was similar to your DS and I just wanted him to have a love for books, so I read him age appropriate books that he wasn't ready to read himself, like Harry Potter, Inkheart, Philip Pulman etc. He totally surprised me by getting an A in GCSE English Lang and English Lit!

wheresthel1ght · 03/07/2016 09:54

Honestly I wouldn't worry! My Dss hated school reading books as do a lot of kids. They are boring, mostly irrelevant and frankly crap!

Find an interest he has and try to find books that focus on that. For example, there are some minecraft novellas that are short and aimed at his age - I got Dss them from the book people but I am sure others sell them.

To love it it has to interest him and engage him

Manyshadesofblack · 03/07/2016 09:55

Yanbu to worry. I was worried about my ds so decided to have his reading and writing assessed. So I can understand how you are feeling. Private assessments cost a lot so it is not always worth the money.

Charley50 · 03/07/2016 09:56

Keep reading to / with him. And go to the library and help him to choose books. It's all about instilling a love of books and reading. I rad to my DS until he was 10/11 because he liked quite advanced books but understood them better if i read them to him. Then he got into Harry Potter and read all but the first one himself thank god

listsandbudgets · 03/07/2016 10:11

Just carry on. Dd is 10 and still likes me to read her a bedtime story although she does read for herself as well. It's brilliant that he's showing an interest.

Dd was a bit reluctant at 8 then someone gave her the first Tom Gates book. Something clicked and I had to buy the lot. She's never looked back. They are a but of a mic of proper text and cartoon so maybe worth a try?

decaman · 03/07/2016 10:20

Have you tried non-fiction? What about '1000 facts about' type books, with short sections of text and plenty of pictures? My DS loves non-fiction but only reads school fiction books.

Original poster
Kiddiewinks2008 · 03/07/2016 10:23

His spelling and writing arent great- a bit below average- we've just got him a book to practise spelling etc as its holding him back. He's got a tom gates book actually so will try him with that too! Thanks for all the suggestions Smile

OP posts:
grannytomine · 03/07/2016 10:36

I have 4 kids, one was a late reader, one was average, one an early/above average reader and one was exceptional. They are all adults, all have 1st class degrees, all in professional jobs. The late reader is the most ambitious academically, currently doing his masters and plans for his PhD at Harvard. Try not to worry.

If you want to p off smug friend tell her my daughter had read all the secret seven and famous five books before her fifth birthday. Don't ask me how, we just discovered she could read when she was 2. I have a theory that they didn't clear her memory properly before reincarnation!

grannytomine · 03/07/2016 10:38

Has he got any hobbies he could read about? My reluctant reader loves sport and sports books were the answer for him. My MIL said my husband got interested in reading when he was given some books about animals, Black Beauty, Lassie that sort of thing.

Tomselleckhaskindeyes · 03/07/2016 10:44

I have a reluctant reader of books! However he is on his I pod googling away all the time looking up stuff that interests him. He's not bothered about novels and gets bored with stories. So your boy is not a reluctant reader he is enjoying the reading experience with you. Fwiw my 7 year old is doing really well at school and prefers writing.

SpringerS · 03/07/2016 10:45

I was tested as an advance adult reader at age 7 but I still enjoyed having one of my parents read to me. It's a cosy, comforting way of connecting with your parents especially at bedtime. Your son's insistence that you read to him at night might have less to do with his feelings about reading and more to do with his love of you and this time that you spend together focussed on him.

GoblinLittleOwl · 03/07/2016 10:54

The school most definitely should be able to tell you if your son is progressing; ask for his current reading age, and the results of reading tests and Teacher Assessment since he started school. How far below his chronological reading age is he, if he is at all?
And definitely continue with reading with your son.

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