Free dog sitting service?!

[RubbishG3nericUsername]

Think I may be being a bit of a mug here, or am I just expecting too much from others? I recently looked after a friends dog for just under a week. They recently returned to collect the dog, said thanks and left? No small token gesture of gratitude for giving them free dog care for the best part of a week? I didn't do it to get something from them, nor expect to be paid, but if they had put the dog in kennels it would have cost them an arm and a leg? Just a small thank you card even would've been appreciated.

Yanbu. I pay our dog sitter £25 per day.

Is she normally mean or is it out of character?

No, she's really lovely, and usually brings biscuits for coffee mornings. But I've never looked after her dog before, it's kind of the first big favour one of us has done for the other since becoming friends. The thing is, it's not even like she would be able to return the favour as we don't have any pets? I'm just a little miffed. I must say though we really enjoyed having the dog (but the extra cleaning was an arse)!

Well I usually have to spend about £400 a week to have all our pets looked after when we have a holiday, so you can believe me when someone says they'll do it for free I bite their hand off and treat them very very well.

YANBU, we have always given friends a thank you card / wine / something! When they have looked after our dog. Saying that the friends who looked after him last time kept him for an extra day and they didn't want to give him back! They sent us pictures of their DCs cuddling him and him all curled up on the sofa with them.

You need to reevaluate this person.

That was somewhat rude, yes. My friend and I often sit each others chickens and cats, and then always buy each other a lovely gift to say thanks and we thought of you while away. While reciprocating in itself is a thank you, a small token says 'I appreciate you'.

I always bring a present back from holiday for whoever looks after my pets, even the Guinea pigs who take about 5 minutes effort per day. Nothing extravagant, maybe a box of local booze or biscuits from wherever we've been.

Is it possible you've been a bit too enthusiastic about the dog previously?

Just wondering if she thought you'd enjoy it so much it was a treat for you, and not a favour for her?

If she's come to come to collect the dog straight over then maybe she's still yet to give you something. However as you claim to not expect anything for doing so then why are you upset.

The British culture of reciprocity can be taken too far. It is rather sad that every interaction seems to be a transaction, and sometimes a person cannot do a good deed because others are fearful of the need to reciprocate.

It is unusual not to bring a physical token of thanks with her as she collected the dog, but I'm sure she will have the opportunity to show you her gratitude in a less transactional way in the weeks, months and maybe years to come.

Money or gifts is so awkward for me.

I would of just said thanks, and as its a friend im sure she would help you out in other ways?

Back from holiday is exausting, probably just wanted to get home and to bed.

Alasalas2

Jiminy Christmas, my giddy aunt! (taken that from the other thread). They sound like entitled chancers. Please stop dog sitting their arses. Just say 'I can't do it', no apologies no excuses.

arses? I meant dogs!

Maybe they will give you a gift next time they see you?

I dog sit for a couple of different friends when they are on holiday and always get undying gratitude as well as a gift of some kind, often food or wine. It doesn't usually happen at the doggie handover though, as often people are in a rush and just want to pick up the dog/unpack/sleep etc. I would give them a few days and see if anything materialises. Enjoyable as it is, dog-sitting can be a major inconvenience and is saving them a lot of money so i would expect at least an acknowledgment of that and an offer to perform a favour in return.

Thank you so much for all your thoughts. I'll leave it a few days and see what happens. I have a young baby and our house is also on the market, so cleaning it for viewings whilst trying to look after DD and dog, and then getting them both out the house was a pain. DH said I just need to learn to say no a little more and stop trying to be all things to all people