to complain about play school bully

[blondieblonde]

My DD who is 3 and a half has had a couple of bad scrapes this last week at play school, and she told me a particular older boy pushed/scratched her. I want to talk to the teacher about it on Monday but am not sure how best to put it -- anyone got any experience of this?

There is no such thing as a play school bully. Three year olds are children who are learning about their place in social environments.

However, if your child is being hurt you can approach staff to ask that they watch for conflict.

You should just raise the issue directly - say what has happened. I agree with lougle that the concept of bullying is pretty much meaningless among pre-schoolers.

Speak to them. Don't complain yet or complain about a bully.

Just speak to them.

Talk to the preschool. I would say my 4 yr old blames his sister if he falls over in her vicinity whether she had anything to do with it or not, but def mention it at preschool

Well don't call him a bully for a start!

I'd just say to nursery that dd had been hurt. Did they know how? Could they keep an eye out this week?

You need to consider that not everything your child tells you will be what actually happened.

It might be at least partially true, but often what they say and what happened are not exactly the same thing. I remember my then 3 yr old DS being told off for biting another child's finger. It turned out that they had been playing crocodiles and the other child had told him to snap him. I imagine the other child went home with the story "X bit me!"

Hm maybe, but this child has been in some situations before where he's hurt other classmates...

Whatever is happening with him and other children isn't your concern. Speak to them, ask where did she get the scrapes, could they keep an eye out this week. Do not go in on your high horse (not saying you are now btw) and complaining of all sorts about this other kid.

A three year old isn't a bully.

He's a child learning about boundaries and expectations. He also needs to develop an aware of his emotions and how to handle them.

The key here is whether the teachers and parents will work together. It's no good if parents are dismissive and don't put the ground work in. Hopefully they have a plan in place and the best thing you can do is teach your child how to seek help and be assertive in seeking it when necessary

as people have said he's 3.5 barely out of being a toddler, certainly not a bully. Did the play school not inform you when she was injured and have you sign an accident form?

By all means ask about how she scraped herself, but leave out the crap about the other boy being a bully.

By all means mention your concerns, but do not use the word "bully" - three year olds are not capable of being bullies, and you will lose any credibility with the staff if that is your approach.

was going to say exactly what ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged said!