To think that using a "private" browser and then denying it is never going to be innocent?

[DogsDanglies]

And before anyone says it - he wasn't buying me a present or organising a surprise, he's not that type.

The other day he left the computer and I jumped on it. I noticed he had a private (incognito) browser open which to be fair, had nothing dodgy on it but the very fact that he had normal browser windows open and then this private one behind them was enough for me to question it. He denied all knowledge of it and then said it must have happened accidentally. A private browser window does NOT accidentally open. When I said this, he got flustered and said he didn't know why it was there. I left it.

But I didn't forget about it. Maybe because 4 years ago, in the early days of our relationship he was caught out using dating sites and casual sex sites. This continued a year into our relationship. The cynic in me says why would a man, who has previous form for shit internet behaviour, who does NOT have form for buying me internet based surpises - be using a private browser.

Or AIBU?

I've opened the incognito browser on my tablet by accident a couple of times. Didn't even know what it was the first time it opened.

I've accidentally turned on private browsing on my phone before. It happens.

The bigger issue here, is that due to his previous behaviour, you don't trust him. And that's totally understandable.

Yanbu.

I've accidentally turned on the incognito mode several times. I find it quite irritating.

erm...no..
I always brows mumsnet on private browser
I HATE ! the threads changing colour when I've read them...ok...largely because it shows up just how much time I've frittered and I'd rather not know

oh and gift shopping...so my browsing dosnt show up as
"Similar shit to what you've been looking at"
ok some of the gifts might be for me.....

I'm just keeping my amazing style choices and useful use of leisure time secret
.....ok - its a bit guilty........

I turned private browsing on my iPad on by mistake. It was on for ages before I worked out what it was and how to turn it off.

I've done it on the computer by mistake before as well. On our computer there's a little icon next to the web address bar for private browsing and I've clicked on it by accident.

Porn. Its what the private browser is for. I wouldn't worry about it unless your love-life isn't that great at the moment. If it is great then perhaps he's getting some good tips... enjoy.

If you don't trust him because of something he did 2 years ago then perhaps you should look at yourself a little too or is there more to this? has he done something else more recently?

Yes, there's so many good reasons to use a private browser, indeed you be sensible to always use it, being tracked around the web is not in anyone's interest. It's also trivially easy to open one by mistake as others have said. He may not even have known...

Maybe he's still using the internet for casual sex - that's a reason to be annoyed with him if he is. Just using private browsing, no, not at all, plenty of reasonable reasons to do that.

DP has his iphone browser set to 'private'. He thinks I haven't noticed but I have, just haven't asked him about it. I know he's not done it by accident as he got a new phone recently and changed the browser on that to private too. It annoys me for some reason, I think because he's assuming I won't notice. I agree he's probably been viewing porn. Although if he has previous form for using dating sites etc then I would probably be feeling suspicious too.

Well it could have been accidentally opened which seems reasonable if he left it open and it was a blank page.

However, you know him and his reactions - did he seem to be lying or genuine?

I've done it by mistake. And I've done it on purpose for non-nefarious reasons.

But thats all by the by because obviously your actual problem here is that you don't trust your husband at all.

Maybe he was browsing mumsnet

I generally use a private browser - I'm happily married and don't look at porn or dating sites, or anything I expect DH would object to. But sometimes I look at holidays we could never afford, or silly-price houses (just dreaming really!) and would not want to have to explain my browsing if DH ever looked. Which I suspect he doesn't.

It's sensible if shopping at sites with variable prices like Amazon or when booking flights.

I don't know what a private browser is?

I've opened a private browser in error on my iPad several times; I don't know how I've done it and it's annoying as I don't know how to get rid of it.

It's never happened on a laptop or pc though, so I don't think yabu to be suspicious.

He was probably just looking at porn.

I use a private browser when looking for flights.

I use private all the time. Newspapers and magazines (Economist, Telegraph, many others) that allow a certain number of articles per day or month start counting afresh once it's closed, I don't get ads for school uniform for 2 months after buying some school socks from M&S or nappies after viewing mn...

I've used it to google embarrassing health queries as I'm quite generous with my iPad when we have visitors and am worried they might see my browsing history.

But it sounds like you have very valid reasons to be suspicious of your dp's use of it.

I think I might use incognito more often if it blocks annoying ads.