To burn the house down

[JessTitchener]

DD3 has impetigo and there's a spider in the bathroom.

I think these things are unrelated but just to be on the safe side I should probably burn the whole place down, yes?

That's a shitty idea.

Burn it, burn it now!

And beat yourself with birch twigs for not putting "light hearted" in the title for the hard of thinking.

I'd do the same!

Only if there was also a mouse in there

Her from next door's dog's cousin's owner's sister in law almost burned to death in a house fire.

How could you joke about such a thing OP? Shame on you.

Many apologies, I shall get myself over to nethuns as penance.