Would you take this job?obm

[PeppaAteMySoul]

I have a 2 year old son and currently work part time around my dp's hours so someone is always with the toddler. I have been offered a new job which is much better paid but very long hours 4 days per week. Our financial situaion means we do need the extra money but it would effectivley mean 4 days per week I wouldn't see my son. Would it be worth the trade off for you, I can't decide.

Oops sorry, phone added obm.

Our financial situation means we do need the extra money

Take the job, if you find it really difficult to cope you'll have to look for something else but give it a go.

Only you can decide that unfortunately.

I worked 4 X 10 hour days for a few years. Including travelling it was 11. But because of the hour and dhs shifts it meant that I took dd to school in the morning and he did it in the afternoon and had her all evening.

I also had 3 days off a week.

It worked for us. I got an hour and a half to 2 hours with her in the morning and 3 evenings I got all evening with her. And all day Sunday's.

But it wouldn't work for everyone

If you need the money, you should take the job...

I want to. I just have a few reservations. I mean is it fair to prioritize money over spending time with my ds? They are only little for so long and I feel I have already missed out a lot on his life; when he was born I was suffering from PTSD after a sexual assult. It's only the last few months I feel like me again.

But then this job is a huge step up for me both in terms of pay and responsibility. I would be mad to turn it down. My partner is wary of it as he would be doing the bulk of the childcare, and he thinks that would be difficult.

Oh and and hours plus travelling w

Sorry, stupid phone, hours plus travelling would mean I would leave before he got up and get back after he was in bed.

I wouldn't if it meant I didn't see him at all for 4 days.

Unless you are in a complete financial mess I don't think I'd take this job with such long hours. Have you actually worked out how much better off you'll be when you take transport costs and childminding into consideration and any benefits you might lose. But only you can decide what's best.

I'd take the job.

Honestly this is a question only you can answer. How will you cope with the guilt associated with not seeing your child for 4 days? Will seeing him completely uninterrupted for 3 make up for that enough?

How much do you need the money? Is there a job that offers a compromise (a bit more money, slightly less hours)?

It's a difficult call. I have to spend some nights away from my dd and I find those days awful. But I know others who would thrive on this situation

Personally, I'd love to be 'just me', 4 whole working days per week, and feel I'd be happier and better able to enjoy the remaining family time, especially with increased income. It's ok if mums want to do this. You don't have to feel guilty if it works for you.

How badly do you need the money?

Are there childcare options? Perhaps one of the days go to childcare rather than relying on OH to fill all the gaps

I think it's fair to do it if you need the money. You would still have 3 whole days with ds. Personally I would struggle with not seeing him at all for 4 days, however.

How much do you need the money? If it is to keep a roof over your head, then you have to take the job. If "need" means that you can't afford holidays abroad, then you have to think whether your child would prefer holidays abroad or to see their mum more.

Well said ridemesideways.

It's not just a case of needing the money now though is it? Surely taking a job which is a step up and offers more responsibility is going to be a good move for you in the future too.

Yes they are little for only so long - and you have to think about what you want to be doing when your DS is older and at school all day. If you don't take this opportunity now then you could be limiting your options in the future.