To act like my 12 year old?

[WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant]

He is giving me a lot of attitude.
So I gave him some back!

He was whinging about not wanting to do 'my' washing up.
And I hadn't decided what was for dinner fast enough...

So, as he didn't want to do my things or family things, I said he could eat his beans for tea!

He has had a school dinner... He is 12.

Is it unreasonable to show him how 'attitude' affects other people?

It's only a one-off. He won't starve for missing a meal?

Yanbu fair play

IMO I don't think it is a good idea for you to act as a 12 year old would, or play tit for tat.
Why? Because you are the adult here and should set a good example, despite the provocation and the sheer and utter selfishness of a teen.

However, they are behaving as they are, because they don't yet fully understand the consequences of their actions. You do!

Despite feeling like throttling them ( we have all been there) you have to respond to them at all times with respect. If you want them to grow up to be respectful adults then you have to set them a good example.

Tit for tat will escalate and they can be a lot more destructive than you.
Please stop and think, count to ten and be calm and patient.

Or..... Shout until you are all shouting, play games until you are gamed out, which will end in tears all round and the line between the child and adult is blurred.

YANBU, but as the above poster says, it can't go on forever. If this has no effect on his behaviour, change tack quickly.

Thankfully, there was no shouting (well, not from me...)

Hopefully he's more chilled in the morning.