To be annoyed that DH has manflu?

[Owlycat]

Whenever he has manflu he has it at the weekend.

This means he will spend all weekend just sitting in the chair, watching TV, in a foul mood, not interacting with any of us and not doing a thing.

He also has gone to bed very early tonight and will no doubt do it all weekend. Again it annoys me as I'm sitting on my own every evening and he expects all lights upstairs to be off, no noise etc. Which at 7.30/8pm with 3 kids at the weekend isn't realistic.

He seems to only have a cold. If I am ill I get no sympathy and he'd go absolutely ballistic if I just sat in the chair in a foul mood.

Well to be fair, it sounds like you have indulged this in the past so not sure why you expect any different.

I haven't indulged it, but I can't tell a grown man not to do something can I?

If I am ill I get no sympathy and he'd go absolutely ballistic if I just sat in the chair in a foul mood

Give him a taste of his own medicine.

Or just let him treat you like this.

Your choice.

Is he much nicer when he doesn't have "manful"?

My DH doesn't get manful, when he's ill he takes himself to bed sleeps whatever off without moaning/being pathetic and gets up when he's better. When we've been simultaneously ill (the norovirus event has never been forgotten) we shared the carnage of coping with the dc.

It's not all men by any means...

Yanbu.

it's irrational and selfish ink ow however I have to bloody carry on mo matter how shit I'm feeling or things don't all get done. so I get annoyed when he takes teh time to rest and recover.

Again it annoys me as I'm sitting on my own every evening and he expects all lights upstairs to be off, no noise etc. Which at 7.30/8pm with 3 kids at the weekend isn't realistic. So don't do it. Why on earth would you?

No, you are not being unreasonable to be annoyed. Of course not! I expect you have done the similar thing that I have and given loads of sympathy when your dh says he's ill,because you would only make a fuss if you were floored and only now just copped on to the fact that you get nothing back, even when you are struggling.
He is being precious, but my husband can be too. I have only recently told him to pull himself together. He has tried a bit. I am starting to realise that it is not on, though. Not fair on you at all. Will he take telling?

No he'll just be in a bad mood for days now

Rotten for you, lovely.
Hard to know what to say.
I have tried to be a bit dismissive, 'Awful to feel so ill, glad you are not making a fuss!'
I have said to my husband previously that clearly he is not well enough to come out with us as he is being so unpleasant. We are going out now, see you later.
I have never actually had to go on our own.

Can you take the kids out for the weekend?
Cinema and tea out somewhere? Parks or countryside.
Just leave him to his own devices, he can cope on his own.

Dh does this. I mostly ignore him and don't let him away with murder eg finding energy for what he wants but not more boring or crap jobs.

This did slightly backfire a couple of years ago when he ended up in hospital quite seriously ill but genuinely there's no difference between how he was then to how he is with a cold. Boy that cried wolf and all that.