NDN barking dog - note through door. WIU?

[Funkingownit]

Hi. I'm one of those annoying, overly-sensitive people that doesn't like noise, and I'm cursed with super-hero hearing. At home with 5 month old baby, allergic to the sun, so stuck indoors (can't take antihistamines during current pregnancy) and generally irritable.

NDN dog barks when left alone. The whole time, no joke. From the minute they leave to the minute they get back, throwing in some howling for good measure. I can't believe the dog hasn't lost it's voice (can this even happen?).

So yesterday, the dog is barking from early in the morning and still going at 10pm. I'm going fecking crazy, so decide to write a note, as obviously they're not in to talk to face to face. Said note is extremely polite (we have very nice neighbours and I don't want to piss them off), explain how I'm worried about the dog, which I am, and how it is also unfortunately very annoying for me. I sign off with my name so they know where the note came from. It's not at all passive aggressive, which is unusual for me, and I hate confrontations.

Neighbour came round this morning to apologise. It was all extremely pleasant and we had a nice chat - except for the fact that he was in hospital and this is why the dog was alone Although, the dog does behave this way whenever left alone, so it wasn't the first time it's happened, which I also explained.

Obviously, I do feel bad, but I didn't know he was in hospital. I offered any help needed, and that I'm happy to pop round to check on dog if needed any time in the future, partly to reduce distress of the dog as much as anything else. Relations with neighbour still good, but it's playing on my mind that I shouldn't have written the note. WIU??

I think writing the note has created the first steps needed to resolve the issue for you and dog. So no, yanbu.

Speaking face to face is always best. But I'm chicken shit so I'd have got DH to do it.

Don't dwell on it. You offered to pop in on the dog which is a lovely thing to do.

you did completely the right thing, i dont think i would have been able to be so polite, i cant stand noise, especially dogs!!

No, it's broken the ice about the dog and you have made an offer to help, which ndn may take up if needed. I think it's all worked out well.

I think note was fine, you weren't to know he was in hospital but your still friends and are working together to help doggie.

thanks peeps, my gosh, the relief just reading those few comments!! I could almost cry

Cookielady - ditto - although dp wouldn't have got involved, so I knew it was down to me!!

thanks again xx

If it were my dog I'd want to know she'd been barking when alone. As an owner, unless someone tells you you'll never know.

I think you handled it extremely well and your NDN now knows that you are willing to check on the dog if needed, it's unfortunate that he was in hospital but you wasn't to know.

Poor thing, you sound really stressed over it all.

Yanbu, you did the right thing.

(On a side note, i was told by my gp that piriton was safe to take during pregnancy + a nose spray that he also prescribed. Maybe a visit to your gp? Hay fever can be awful! )

Thanks MagicMojito. It's not hayfever, I get what is like sunburn within 2 minutes of being in the sun (and sometimes the shade) This started in my last pregnancy. Suncream doesn't help either.

I just read on Boots website it can be used for heat rash, hives ect, so I will go to pharmacist tomorrow and inquire. (have been to GP, said he couldn't give me anything) Thanks for advice!!

I think you did the right thing. so don't worry :) barking dogs all day is annoying because the owner who chooses to have a dog doesn't have to put up with it.

As a side note; I couldn't work out from your op? are you pregnant or do you have a 5 month baby? or both? I was going to say if you go to your gp they may be able to help with anti histamine

seen your update that gp couldn't do anything! hope you have better luck at the pharmacy :)

I'm also allergic to the sun OP.

Does the 'sunburn' itch at all? I end up covered in what looks like chicken pox blisters and they itch like hell for days.

Piriton is absolutely amazing for taking the itching away.

But it's reactive rather than proactive, so if your allergy doesn't actually make you itch then I can't see it being particularly useful.

I have to keep covered up and wear sunblock on my hands (the thin skin on my knuckles suffers a lot).

Hi. OP here. Just an update and plea for advice. Things are no bloody better. I'm sitting here listening to their stupid dog go fucking crazy, and can see it sat in their front room window barking it's head off (can see from my bedroom window). I'm so angry, frustrated and insane (from the noise) I want to throw a brick through their window and let the stupid dog loose. I've got the TV and can hear it. I've had to shut the windows, in this fucking heat.

I don't feel like I can bring this up with them again - it took all my (cowardly) courage to broach it in the first place. What the hell can I do??? I'm seriously considering moving because of it (private rented, pretty sure they own their house). We've not been here a year yet.

It's truly driving me fucking crazy . I hate hate HATE them.

Please call environmental health. no one wants to hear a dog barking for hours. not least one that isn't yours! I hope things improve op.

seconded; call environmental health. Cruel to the dog and more importantly, cruel to the neighbours!

If NDN is in hospital then there are volunteers or charities that provide walkers and there is something called walk my dog or some such which matches those who can't have a dog due to circumstances and those who can't walk their dogs as much as needed.
Can imagine noise as well as worry that animal is clearly distressed must be hard to bear especially if you are feeling a tad bit hormonal.
Sorry but a caring owner should make arrangements for a dog if they can't be there enough to care for it

Hi. Just want to add some details in response to pps. The wife is mostly at home, dog barks whenever she goes out, they have a large family which come and go all the time and i've offered to go round myself ,although obviously they might not want me in their house, understandably.

I think it's so cruel for the dog. It's actually a working dog, as in goes shooting with it's owner occasionally. It should be living on a farm or something, not a terrace in a town.

They came home and barking stopped at 10pm. I might just call environmental health and be done with it .Although dh has approved looking for a new place (and with an extra bedroom )

Oh, and dh is definitely not the sort to go round and get involved

Thanks for support. Nice to know it's not just me !

Ring the council and animal welfare. I would. It's not reasonable to keep a dog and do that. Total cruelty. The dog is clearly communicating this with its distressed state.

Do you use any aromatherapy oils? One of them can bring you out in a rash in sunlight. I'm sorry but I can't remember which one, it was happening to me last year until I realised. Or could you buy an Aussie rash vest? You might feel a bit daft but you could get put and about a bit.

Move. I am so much happier since the ndn moved with the barking dog's.

It sounds as though the dog has separation anxiety. SA is not easily treated, and takes time and effort - which might not be compatible with their current lifestyle if he's in hospital. I think you could write another note 'Just following up on our previous conversation...' Which might prompt them to deal with it.

If you do give notice to your LL make sure you tell them the reason! The next tenants aren't going to be any happier than you are so if your LL knows there's an issue they may take action themselves