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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not have sought "medical opinion"

14 replies

CandOdad · 07/07/2015 10:25

So my DS (6) trapped his finger in the garden. We of course washed and cleaned his finger and check he could move it etc when we did this. I told him to let us know if it started to hurt more but he has said other than it being bruised and the nail turning steadily black it is fine.

School rang us this morning "suggesting" that he should have been taken to walk in / A&E "just in case"

Was I unreasonable as a parent to not do this when he is fine in himself, slept well without the need for painkillers and says he is happy with it as it is?

OP posts:

LashesandLipstick · 07/07/2015 10:27

No, school are BU for getting involved. Why do schools think they have a right to busy body?

Tuskerfull · 07/07/2015 10:31

No, you assessed the injury and made a sensible choice. They are ridiculous to think such a "suggestion" is helpful or could do anything but make you feel guilty / get your back up.

hiddenhome · 07/07/2015 10:32

They need to stop interfering.

People constantly taking the 'just in case' approach are why A&E depts are clogged up with healthy people.

Most GP surgeries have a nurse practitioner who will take care of minor injuries if they don't settle down.

midnightvelvetPart2 · 07/07/2015 10:33

Well had the child told school it hurt or did a staff member notice & ask? If your DS was complaining to school about his finger then maybe they thought the injury was more serious than it appears?

Original poster

CandOdad · 07/07/2015 10:39

I did feel guilty Tusker. I understand they need to safeguard but it's to the extreme at times I think. I wondered if I had a distorted view since my mother was very much of the opinion you get taken to the hospital in an ambulance for true emergencies, anything else can be treated at home or by the doctor. (To the point where once when a car ran over my foot she wanted to "give it a soak in salty water" first before we put anyone to any bother - just glad that time she changed her mind)

OP posts:

Original poster

CandOdad · 07/07/2015 10:40

Midnight I believe it was a case of the teacher saw it and asked how it happened situation. To which of course he then proudly showed his war wound to all they wanted to see it.

OP posts:

Teabagbeforemilk · 07/07/2015 10:40

It depends. Has someone first aid trained looked at it and said this?

Has he complained about it hurting at school?

Suggesting a trip to a&e isn't a big deal imo. I am sure schools would get loads of shit if they saw an injury that they felt needed attention and ignored it

rogueantimatter · 07/07/2015 10:42

YANBU IMO. Sometimes even the A+E medics can't do much until bruising settles. A lengthy trip to A+E, especially if it results in going to bed late is tiring and focuses attention on the problem.

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 07/07/2015 10:48

Ds came out of school with a cool pack and a sheet of blue roll on his arm. Said to me "school think I need an x-ray"

He had broken his arm, playing sport in school.

Took them several requests over the next few weeks to give us the accident form!

Seems like they are one extreme or the other!

If your ds had complained of pain, then yes, they should contact you and say he needs to go, now.

If he isn't bothered about it, not hurting, then they should keep their noses out!

midnightvelvetPart2 · 07/07/2015 10:59

Ah I see, bless him :) Actually I wasted the time of A&E last week but I didn't mean to.

Basically DS1 who's 10 woke up with a purply pinprick rash on his arm, it didn't blanch under the glass but there were no other symptoms & he was as happy as usual. However I phoned NHS Direct (or whatever they're called now) to see if someone needed to look at it & they told me it had to be seen by a doctor within 2 hours! Couldn't get in at our GP as usual so I took him to the Walk In Centre, they had a look, got a second opinion then told me I had to take him to A&E. DS is still bouncing around smiling at everyone & being his normal self so I queried it & they said yes, he has to go to A&E. So I took him there, took 30 minutes on the bus! & saw the triage nurse who said basically that it was a bruise & that I should have recognised it as such this morning & sent him to school. She was very stand offish verging on rude so I felt like a fool, explained that I'd already spoken to NHS Direct & the walk in centre who had referred me to them & asked if I could take him back to school then, if it wasn't serious. She said no & that DS had to see a doctor now that we were there. By the time DS saw a doctor the rash had faded a little & was red rather than purple & DS was discharged so I can understand how the nurse was pissed off as it was fairly clear A&E was not needed.

Next time I'll use my common sense & see how I think he is! Thank goodness for the NHS & I know they have guidelines to follow but it felt as though A&E was such a waste of everyone's time & that everyone along the way just needed to cover their backs in case it turned out to be serious. I was worried that if I didn't follow the walk in centre's advice that it would be on DS's notes that I had failed to comply with their instructions so I felt I had to go, even once I was 100% sure DS was OK. Total waste of a doctor's time.

Maybe your school has similar guidelines & that they have to cover their own backs in case your DS's injury became infected or something & the finger was pointed at them for not taking action...

Fizzielove · 07/07/2015 11:02

I had this last month! PTA! Childs hand closed I car door by her brother! After 5 mins upset / cold compress applied DD was fine. Hand a bit sore a expected! Made the mistake of mentioning it to nursery teacher from hell! I was 'told' I HAD to take her to A & E and that she couldn't stay at nursery!! WTF! Even the hospital thought I was crazy!!

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 07/07/2015 11:10

midnight - that triage nurse was rude, don't let it make you hesitate if you are worried in future. MOST HCPs are very understanding about children's health issues and would always tell you to bring them in if you are worried.

OP, just keep an eye on his fingernail and his fingertip - if it starts to swell under the nail it will get extremely painful (as I'm sure you know) and he might need to have it checked over to make sure it isn't cracked or anything.

MaitlandGirl · 07/07/2015 11:11

DD2 has low density bones and broke her foot 2yrs ago. I didn't realise for a week and when she eventually saw A&E they laughed at me for constantly apologising for wasting their time. Lol

DD2 told her teachers about it and now every time she hurts herself (usually once a week) they panic and call me to take her to the hospital. Over the course of a month she was in because she'd - dropped a shot putt on her foot, fallen down some stairs when she got swooped by a magpie, fallen off a desk, tripped up the steps onto the stage in assembly and sat on a sewing needle!!

The A&E receptionists know us by name now.

midnightvelvetPart2 · 07/07/2015 11:17

Thumb thanks I felt like such an idiot & it wasn't a bruise :)

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