I know I need to just let this go, but...

[QueenofLouisiana]

AIBU?

Yesterday we went out for lunch with my mum and dad and DH's parents. We went to a pub chosen by DS as he knows his daddy likes it there and it was the first time he's been able to choose where to go on Fathers' Day.

Anyway, towards the end of the meal FIL tells DH he was disappointed not to get a call or text that morning wishing him a happy fathers' day. After all DH's brother had. DH laughed it off, saying he knew he'd see his dad later (like now, at lunch) so left it until then. FIL replied he'd seen BIL at 11pm last night when they'd babysat for nephews, but still got a text.

AIBU to not bother with lunches, invitations for coffee, presents when clearly he just wants a text. We got whinged at while BIL was great for sending a text! I'll save myself £200 and hours of faining interest in MIL's family stories!

Sounds like BIL is the golden child and your DH will never match up. He might as well just send a text next year and stop trying so hard. It clearly isn't appreciated.

YANBU but youre being OTT in your reaction.
It would be nice if your DH sent a quick text 'happy fathers day - see you later!'
But your FIL is being UR to comment on his dissapointment when he knew he would be seeing his son later, seems pretty petty.

next time, perhaps he should say
well, next year, I'll send you a text and X can buy you dinner.

I think just bite your lip till it bleeds and think "Oh thanks, we spend £200 and get no bloody thanks but you do BIL a favour babysitting and he's the Golden Child "

Then next year, no meal, but send a card and text.

Families do come out with things though, notice what you don;t do, not what you do.

It would never in a million years occur to me to send my Dad (or anyone else) a text to say Happy Father's Day/Birthday/Christmas/How's it going if I was going to see them in a few hours time.

You might find though that they do it the other way round to BIL. My gran could be quite unpleasant to my mum in telling her how wonderful her other children were, but she used to tell them how wonderful mum was.

Thanks all. A card and a text it is next year. to all of you who are biting your lips on behalf of your DP's. Sometimes deep breaths are needed!

YANBU! What an ungrateful git