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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think people on AIBU can be very pedantic.

30 replies

tarashill · 31/01/2015 15:11

Perhaps not so much pedantic but will often misconstrue things you've said or imply you said something you clearly hadn't. It's often worse on a long thread and someone will refer to something you'd said a long way up thread, and just as in a conversation in real life you might have forgotten what you'd said. Time is then taken up trawling back through your comments to something you'd said but has been taken out of context. It's fair enough when they have a valid point but it can get tedious when you have to keep going on the defensive about something you hadn't said. Sometimes you feel like you're being grilled by the gestapo.

OP posts:
ourglass · 31/01/2015 15:12

Yanbu

SolomanDaisy · 31/01/2015 15:14

Can be very pedantic? It's the whole motivation behind half the posters on AIBU. An exercise in close textual analysis by Eeyore having a particularly bad day, the whole aim of which is to reach the conclusion that yes, you are being unreasonable.

BrucieTheShark · 31/01/2015 15:16

Lol, this is a bit like saying I've just noticed the pope is quite catholic.

Mintyy · 31/01/2015 15:16

Yanbu. Some people appear to live their lives solely to be arses on AIBU. Feel sorry for them and post elsewhere.

BrucieTheShark · 31/01/2015 15:16

Solomon has it to a tee

ilovesooty · 31/01/2015 15:18

If the tread becomes long and involved I think you have to expect people to be following the discussion.

There are other forums to post in of course.

meditrina · 31/01/2015 15:20

What is blazingly obvious to one reader might be totally opaque to another.

People pick up on what they find most relevant. So unless you are tying to impose an exceptionally unreasonable level of uniformity on how people think, trying to dictate what's reasonable about how people post is an exercise in pissing against the wind.

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 31/01/2015 16:31

Say what now? AIBU pedantic? Never noticed!

Wink
Topseyt · 31/01/2015 16:40

I'd agree, but would add that it isn't just in AIBU, though it is perhaps more concentrated in here.

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 31/01/2015 17:10

The Feminism board is very laid back...

Icimoi · 31/01/2015 17:11

Misconstruing things is the reverse of pedantic, isn't it? But I do agree with your basic point. I've been on threads where people have been so determined on their own agenda that they keep twisting what other people say just so that they can triumphantly answer points that haven't been made. For instance, you post an opinion in support of rehabilitation as part of prison sentences, and some idiot posts "So, you think prisoners should live in five star hotels, do you?" Mind you, if it's your posts that are being misconstrued, and if you have the time, it can be quite fun picking them up on what they're doing - I've upset a few arseholes that way.

borisgudanov · 31/01/2015 23:00

Bring back the nice threaded newsreaders from days of yore on Usenet, that would solve this problem.

mrsfuzzy · 31/01/2015 23:49

aibu is certainly an interesting site, but yes op, there are some posters that seem to have their heads up their backsides, complete bitches and some will merely copy other peoples words and ideas, but it's usually a good read, even if it goes ott sometimes ! mners, you're a great bunch really !!

BackforGood · 31/01/2015 23:57

I agree with Medritina.

I mean, there are posters on all boards that like to nit pick, and those that like to pick up on typos and other grammar or spelling mistakes - that's not confined to AIBU - but, overall, it's not something I've seen.

Often you do have to get things cleared up as most posters do tend to forget that no-one else knows anything about their situation in the first place, and forgets that the other hundreds of thousands of posters can be at different stages of life, different economic situations, live in different Countries, etc., etc., etc., and we sometimes forget that, and start to answer, imagining their own situation.

ouryve · 31/01/2015 23:58

Sounds like AIBU
Is not the board for you.

concretekitten · 01/02/2015 00:25

YANBU
I also hate how according to posters in AIBU, everyone's DH is apparently a total twat and we should all divorce them tomorrow Hmm

stayanotherday · 01/02/2015 00:26

I agree. I give as good as I get now. Fair enough to disagree but it can still be polite. Some get over invested.

SummerHouse · 01/02/2015 07:44

I think it can bring out the very worst in people but also the very best and sometimes funniest. I love reading it but will think twice about ever starting another thread.

mrsfuzzy · 01/02/2015 22:42

you're no one until you've had a flaming on aibu, quite easily achieved too, i've had a couple for asking a straight forward question or two, some people do like to get their knicks in a right twist over the silliest things, great fun though, can just imagine them grinding their teeth, tweeting, f b etc on the major gripe of the day !

SorchaN · 01/02/2015 23:11

Misconstruing things is the reverse of pedantic, isn't it?
Grin Grin
I'm quite pedantic myself.

Topseyt · 01/02/2015 23:22

You do need rhinoceros hide to use AIBU, that's for sure.

I read it and lurked for months before posting. You have to have a good feel for it first or it could be a baptism of fire.

Lottie5 · 01/02/2015 23:58

I have had some amazing insightful responses to posts on here but unfortunately there are those who don't bother reading the posts let alone trying to understand what the poster feels. They decide to take offence, pick out a sentence that they can take offence at and then have an over the top acutely personal rant. I find it totally weird!!

MoominKoalaAndMiniMoom · 02/02/2015 00:07

It's easy to tell which posters are the ones who use AIBU to vent some of their stress and anger, forgetting/ignoring the fact that the people they're attacking are real people with feelings - they're the ones posting to say "Well no-one's forcing you to post here", and "AIBU isn't the forum for you then" Grin

Lottie5 · 02/02/2015 00:14

I know! I was told by one poster that I had no right to expect people to be civil!!! Did make me chuckle.

whatawhoppa · 02/02/2015 00:14

I have read a lot of threads on here, some are hilarious. But theres always the handful of people who feel the need to be nasty keyboard warriors.