To not get out of bed

[Ihavenobrain]

when my dd age 7 shouts me in the night "mummy can you come here please?"
She used to just take herself off to the loo in the night on her own but now she shouts me into her room and then says come toilet with me.
She's says she's too scared.
We have a typical new build 3 bed terrace and its tiny. I keep the landing light on so its not dark.
Last night she woke me and my husb AND my ds by shouting me. I refused to get out of bed and said no you go, you will be fine, the lights on. So she came into my room and sat next to me just saying nothing at all. I then couldn't sleep. I turned over and then she fell onto the floor and started crying.
I didn't comfort her as was so tired and half a sleep. I stomped with her to the loo. My hub and ds shouted "what's going on"!
Anyway you get the idea

I'd be trying to work out what has changed and why she is suddenly scared to go to the toilet on her own. If she was genuinely crying after she came into your room then I'd be a bit more sympathetic tbh. It doesn't sound as though she is deliberately trying to make your life awkward but you not responding to her is waking everyone else up. That doesn't seem like a better solution to me.

fwiw I'm not saying we constantly have to pander to our DCs but she's 7, she's crying, she's suddenly scared of something that didn't scare her before, I'd be finding out what is going on.

She says it's the dark and the noises.
Just gets hard when it's getting to be every night. But yes I do agree. Must try harder when woken up in the middle of the night. ??

Has she got a night light in her room too? Children can genuinely fear the dark. The hall maybe light enough for her to see her way to the toilet - but going back into a very dark bedroom could be frightening her? Perhaps treat her to a night light in her bedroom and chat about what she might be frightened of.

Yes she has a plug in night light.

I should get up with her shouldn't I.
Feel bad now.
Bless her.

I'm very grumpy when I get woken during the night so I do sympathise but I'd figure I could probably get up with her and back into bed without waking up fully iyswim

Are you in the UK? Has the change coincided with winter and the clocks changing? Perhaps she needs a bigger night light because it is darker now? I know I've had to start leaving DS' night light on during the night. In the summer, he doesn't need a night light so it will go back to just the hall light.

I sympathise as my 6 year old is a nightmare for this. "I can't reach my drink of water" (on a chair by the bed) has been a good one.

I don't think she should be allowed to wake the family for this though? If she has a night light and the hall light it can't be dark that she is afraid of, as that wouldn't be dark?

It sounds like she was only crying when she fell off the bed, not because of the dark. I would be exploring this more before accepting that the whole house should wake up when she needs a wee.

Vanitas yy I would be trying to find out what's brought about the change eg has she read or watched something that frightened her? But, if it's just that the house is darker in winter then I'd put in a new night light.

My 9yo is similar. We put various lamps on so it's not dark. It's very frustrating. I do go to him if he's had a nightmare and is really too scared to move. If he's just yelling 'I need a WEE' then he's on his own.

Aherdofmims ?? made me lol