To not go to this baby shower?

[Mammanat222]

Taking aside the fact I loathe baby showers full stop, AIBU not to go to my friend's one next weekend as I'll be more pregnant than she is?

We share quite a few friends and I'm worried that me being pregnant too will remove focus (god that sounds so precious but I've already had two separate friend's tell me they'll bring 'my' gifts too). I've also seen it at another baby shower - there was another heavily pregnant lady there and the hostess felt obliged to involve her in all the games / activities? If anyone comes near me with a fucking tape measure I'll go mad.

I'm probably over thinking things but I'd hate for my friend's day to be overshadowed. She'll be about 32w and is nice and petite whereas I'll be a few days from due date and massive - can't even disguise the bump to detract from any attention?

Yabu. A little bit. I was a month ahead (with twins) of my neighbour when mutual friends organised her baby shower. It was a hoot. At no time did I feel like the events were compromised by my being there.

However, I'd tell your other friends not to bring their gifts - they can come visit another time or when baby has arrived. They would be unfair to your friend to make the celebration a double even inadvertently.

If you genuinely don't feel up to it because you'll only be a few days away from due, approach your pregnant friend and explain that to her. She may understand, especially if you tell her you are worried about taking attention away from her celebration.

Equally, you may already have the baby/be in labour. There's no telling. You could have an inconvenient MW/clinic appt which clashes and makes your absence inevitable.

YANBU nice of you to think of your friend stupid American idea anyway

Can you not just say to your friends "Thanks but would you mind bringing them another time? I'm a bit worried about accidentally upstaging X."

I think you may as well stay home with your feet up, you can easily get away with saying you are feeling unwell.