to leave the madman?

[Oakmaiden]

So - after Christmas dinner I chucked all the leftovers in the freezer. Defrosted them today - the plan is to have bubble and squeak with fired turkey. Yum.

The man I am married to has asked if I can put a stir fry sauce in it.

He is a lunatic, isn't he? I should leave, shouldn't I?

Fired turkey? What is that?

Tomato ketchup is the only acceptable sauce with bubble and squeak.

I think you need to consider your options very closely as he's not in his right mind.

I like branston pickle with bubble and squeak mmmmm

Oh dear, I'm sorry. Your husband is clearly having some kind of a breakdown. Do you have a well secured attic room by any chance?

Fried. Not fired.

But yes - he is clearly insane. I am beginning to wonder if it is safe for the children to be near him. He may corrupt the little darlings.

The only thing to have with bubble & squeak and leftover turkey is piccalilli.

Lock him in the shed

DH makes the blandest and wettest potato fritters it is possible to imagine. I have begged him to add something so there is some flavour, but he won't. So I won't eat them.

You're lucky! My dh would be concocting a dangerously hot sauce with one or two of those 'ghost' chillis and some Scotch bonnets. Just the steam from the cooking makes my eyes sting. This vicious sauce is poured on everything I cook, even my fabled steak and kidney pie.
Husbands are all insane, every last one of them. They should all be tied into strait jackets and put in padded cells.

Not my DH but my Dad.

He was chopping up the turkey to make his revolting turkey curry and ran out of curry sauce, so he bunged in the rest of the packet of bisto. His half curry/half gravy turkey has gone down in family history. It males my stomach ache remembering the smell, none of us ate it.