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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be seriously annoyed with my DD' nursery?

12 replies

NightOwl8 · 15/12/2014 19:56

DD has had a good run of illnesses this winter so she has had a lot of time off of nursery (D & V).

The nursery sent out a letter saying please do not bring your child in if they have a cold, cough or any other virus as if the staff become ill it means that the ratios are wrong and they can't open.

All fine, I kept my DD off Friday because she was coughing and full of cold but I took her in today as she was feeling much better.

When I got there the manager greeted me and she sounded awful, I asked if she was okay and she said that she had caught a virus and was suffering terribly with it, she certainly looked like she was suffering.

What I am annoyed about is that they want us to keep our children off for fear of the staff catching the virus but when it comes to putting all the children at risk when a member of staff is ill it's fine?

I told her that I hope she feels better soon but I didn't say anything about it at the time and now I'm thinking that I should have.

AIBU?

OP posts:

fluffymouse · 15/12/2014 19:59

It is difficult but surely you should apppreciate that the staff member is making the effort to come in?

I don't think a cold should be a reason to stay off nursery however!

Legodino · 15/12/2014 20:00

That's a tricky one. Yes she should be home if she's very bad but maybe she's struggling though because she doesn't want to let others down

Legodino · 15/12/2014 20:00

Agree everyone should be at work if the have a cold. Flu is different

Icelollycraving · 15/12/2014 20:01

It seems ott to keep children off with a cold or cough. Most children would rarely be in. That would keep their ratios pretty good though!
I would tell them it's not practical to keep a child off for every sniffle.

MrsHathaway · 15/12/2014 20:02

Maybe she is in the office most of the day and won't be breathing germs on the tinies.

You'd be amazed how ill a child can be and still be dropped off at nursery/school.

DoJo · 15/12/2014 20:02

Children are much worse at disease control than adults though - an ill child will sneeze in people faces, wipe their nose on their hands and then touch the door handles and generally spread their lurgy all over the place. An ill adult can be scrupulous about hand washing, cough into their elbow and dettol wipe anything they think they might have contaminated, so the two don't necessarily compare.

ChristmasJumperWearer · 15/12/2014 20:03

Is it a school-affiliated not-for-profit nursery/pre-school or a private nursery?

It's a bit much for a private nursery, where many parents are working, to expect children to be kept off with a cold.

And yes, hypocritical if the staff members come in and spread their germs in spite of their stated policy.

Pipbin · 15/12/2014 20:04

It might have been that either she came in or the nursery would have closed for the day.

2minsofyourtime · 15/12/2014 20:46

I bet she had to maintain ratios otherwise she woukd have been at home in bed.

phoenixrose314 · 15/12/2014 21:00

Hello! I am a nursery teacher and I can't begin to tell you how horrible it is to actually go off sick when you have a cold/respiratory virus. At every place I have ever worked, the line manager/headteacher has been cold and aloof, some even hanging up on me as I'm explaining what's wrong. At this time of year you get a LOT of staff calling in sick, and if you really care about your career, you drag your butt in anyway. In my school you are only allowed three separate counts of sickness before you get a warning followed by disciplinary action!

Honestly. I'm not joking. I wish I was. I've had a cold most of this term, but I have to come in anyway. And aside from the general attitude towards time off for sickness, the amount of paperwork that piles up whilst your away is hard to catch up on, even for the little ones (you wouldn't believe how long it takes to do planning and update all those cute little Learning Stories you love!). Plus the kids are always a bit more frantic and not settled when you're around because the routine will change... Yeah, it's in most people's best interests for you to just be there no matter what. In an ideal world we could take time off when we are genuinely ill... but sadly an idea world is not where we are living.

phoenixrose314 · 15/12/2014 21:02

Three separate bouts of sickness in a year, to be clear.

gooeycookie · 15/12/2014 21:05

When I worked in a nursery we did not get paid for a day's sick leave, and we'd lose our attendance bonus, so one day's sick leave could cost you nearly £100!
For d&v it was a day or two off no question, but I couldn't afford losing money because of a cold... I would've dragged myself in too!!
When you're not paid sick pay even though you catch most of your bugs/illnesses at the nursery, it does put you in a really difficult position financially.

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