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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

To be fucked off with DH

22 replies

Caketinthief · 04/12/2014 23:36

I've NC as could out myself here.

Dp has just started up a new buisness. He is the only income source in the family as I'm a SAHM. Every penny counts at the moment with the new buisness and it's starting to go well.

Im due some money back which the buisness has helped me recover but dp said he still wants me to pay in the fee that they would normally charge clients - as every penny counts at this stage. I was a bit and we had a few discussions on it and I agreed and was fine on it. My db wife is using the device and also is paying the fee.

Tonight dh and FIL come in and were discussing FIL friend who has done some odd jobs for us - always payed. I over heard dh telling df he would do the service cheap and not charge him the full fee! So I pulled dh and apparently he was 'joking' with me and 'forgot' to tell me. In 3/4 convos with him about it he was 'joking' HAR DEE HAR HA.

Then his mother dropped by with her friend and he said the fucking same to her.

When she went he could tell I was fuming. Came over creeping 'it was a joke, I took it too far, sorry ect...

I don't think it was a joke , in fact I know it wasn't a joke . He was just fucking showing off to mummy and daddy.

Dick head.

OP posts:

kittykathat · 04/12/2014 23:41

His time
His money
His business
His say

NoSundayWorkingPlease · 04/12/2014 23:42

Is it PPI reclaim?

SpringBreaker · 04/12/2014 23:43

I think you need to calm down a bit to be honest.. is it really worth all this anger. Surely any money recovered and paid in is joint money anyway.

Original poster

Caketinthief · 04/12/2014 23:44

kitty we will see if that's the case when none of his clothes for work are washed or no cooked meals when he gets in from work or anything else I do for him home wise AND work wise.

nosunday similar

OP posts:

LadyLuck10 · 04/12/2014 23:45

So he wants to 'charge' his wife the full fee and give others a discount?
He sounds very nice

DoJo · 04/12/2014 23:45

Not sure why he would want to do that since as a fee it would be taxable income whereas presumably as a repayment would be tax free, but it depends if he needs the money to invest in the business or if he just wants to make his income look better.

Original poster

Caketinthief · 04/12/2014 23:46

spring your right. I'm not that angry just bummed out its one rule for me his wife and SIL and another for random friends of his parents.

OP posts:

LovleyRitaMeterMaid · 04/12/2014 23:46

He'll not get very far doing mates rates for all and sundry.

Original poster

Caketinthief · 04/12/2014 23:48

lady it was a joke - apparently.

OP posts:

LadyLuck10 · 05/12/2014 00:19

I would be fuming really if my DH even thought of charging me for something like this. You are his wife not some random person.

Waltonswatcher · 05/12/2014 00:25

The wonderful world of a SAHM ! Be very aware op, its a great choice for raising kids without the stress of additional child care etc,but it leaves you vulnerable . As this post shows its a tricky area .

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 05/12/2014 00:27

I would tell DH to fuck off and use somebody else to recover the money.

overslept · 05/12/2014 00:41

OP send him a bill for the laundry/ironing/cleaning etc of anything that belongs to him. Tell him it's only fair as there are professionals out there who offer an ironing service for X amount per hour, cleaning for X amount per hour, but as he is your husband you hadn't thought to charge him... Thus far.

kittykathat · 05/12/2014 01:28

Lol cake
Hold on i didnt read he was charging you i just thought u were angry he was doing mates rates for mates. Thats fuked up tbh i would be mad too

AdoraBell · 05/12/2014 01:40

What Overslept said.

Bogeyface · 05/12/2014 01:42

I would be more concerned that this business wont last long. If he is doing a PPI style claim company that is a fairly new thing (cant think of anything that they are not already doing tbh!) then he will soon get priced out of the market.

Also, unless he is paying £££ for telemarketers, he will soon run out of contacts. I would advise that you and he view this as a short term money maker in order to set up something more stable.

Oh and tell him you will pay his fee as soon as he has paid yours for the hours of childcare you provide :)

Topseyt · 05/12/2014 01:47

I would tell him to stuff his charges up his arse.

I was a SAHM for years. It is no holiday, and often undervalued labour.

avocadotoast · 05/12/2014 08:11

Bogeyface, yup, agreed. Given that people can reclaim PPI themselves, and are becoming increasingly aware of it, it might not last long.

OP, whatever service it is, is it not something you can do on your own behalf? That'd show him!

Original poster

Caketinthief · 05/12/2014 10:00

It's not PPI it's package bank accounts. Relatively new. And I probably could get a template some where off google. It's our secondary business so longevity isn't an issue but there is about three good years in it.

I'm not arse about expecting me to pay a fee as ultimately it would filter back to me anyway. I control the finances in this house. Have access to all accounts. Dh would give me his last penny so I understood that that side of the business needed every start up penny.

What really bothers me is the lie that's followed it.

He was showing off in front of his parents. His dad makes him feel like shit so he is prone to it.

If he admitted he had ballsed up it would have been over but to then lie and say it was joke is not on. To try and make me believe a fact I no not to be true is bare faced cuntery.

And to continue it on even this morning is fucking me off. Lots of sorrys but it was a joke ...didn't mean it to go this far???why would I charge you but not them?"

I'm not angry per say just bummed out and disappointed that he thinks he can lie to my face.

OP posts:

canweseethebunnies · 05/12/2014 10:21

So he said he was joking about doing it for family for free? So he's going to go back and tell them he was 'joking' and they have to pay? Not a very good joke, was it? [hmmm]

canweseethebunnies · 05/12/2014 10:21

Original poster

Caketinthief · 05/12/2014 13:37

No canwe the 'joke' was I had to pay. Only he forgot to tell me it was a 'joke' nearly a week later.

OP posts:

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