To be so fucking glad I no longer live there?

[D0oinMeCleanin]

The Bi-annual clean is going on at my previous address. This where Twunt shoves furniture around the house and usually breaks the sweeping brush by hitting things with it. Lots of shouting and name calling occurs. He can't seem to fathom that if he cleaned a little every day, it would be much easier and less stressful than his current system of cleaning lots, twice a year.

The nutter appeared to believe I was there to "help" aka be the target of his ranting and swearing, when I went to collect a parcel that had been delivered there in error.

And you didn't immediately roll your sleeves up and pitch in, Do0in? I am shocked, I tell you - shocked!!

Oops D0oin not Do0in.

Shove the brush up his arse and the duster in his hand and then he can do twice as much.

No, I had the cheek to reply that I needed to do my own cleaning at my own house before going back to work.

Apparently I am bitch, my house is already clean, so I should help him. I resisted the urge to point out that my house is already clean because I do it little and often, rather than waiting until there is no clear space on the sofa and my view of the TV is obscured by piles of empty crisp packets.

I gathered from the way he was gesticulating towards the TV that he wishes to move it but can't/won't learn how to set it all up again and would like me to help. Once he is able to ask me politely I might consider going around to plug things back in after he has cleaned behind it.

Oh dear me, no way should you do a damn thing to help him. Are you stone mad to even consider helping?

So glad to hear you gave him all the help he deserved!

It is one of the more satisfying things in life to witness somebody who has forced you to live in their mess for years having to clean up without your help. Enjoy the moment. Enjoy it for years. Enjoy your very own clean and tidy personal space forever......

Yes it was very satisfying. He didn't look like he was getting very far. Bless him.