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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed by this complaint about maternity pay?

24 replies

ShadowFall · 18/04/2014 09:54

So.

Facebook friend A posts: Last day at work for a year, maternity leave starts now!

Some American friends post replies along the lines of Wow, a whole year, you are so lucky!

Facebook friend A replies that UK maternity laws are better than US ones.

B (UK based) posts: It depends on your work place. Mine is poor in comparison. We can take up to a year but only 2 weeks is full pay, 6 weeks is at 90% then the remaining time up to 6 months is half pay. The next 3 months you get about 130 a week and the last 3 months you get nothing. I don't know how people can afford to take a year off.

I read this and was a bit Shock Angry

B's maternity package is one of the best maternity packages I've come across among my friends and acquaintances. I'm gobsmacked that she's considering herself hard done by here.

And also annoyed because I'm currently on maternity leave and getting the legal minimum (6 weeks at 90%, 33 weeks at SMP of 138 and the last 13 weeks unpaid). I would love a maternity package as generous as the one B is complaining about - she just doesn't seem to realise how lucky she is!

AIBU?

OP posts:
TheScience · 18/04/2014 09:56

Sounds like she is confused and thinks some people get full pay for a year - I'd post a reply correcting her and letting her know that most women just get SMP.

Ponkypink · 18/04/2014 10:04

Yes YABU, maybe she's comparing against e.g. Sweden rather than the US. It's a bit pathetic when women deliberately participate in a race-to-the-bottom of shouting about how 'lucky' it is to have basic employment rights like decent maternity/parental leave tbh. It's not 'lucky' at all, it's what everyone in every country in the world should be able to expect, and it's very wrong that many can't.

Pumpkinpositive · 18/04/2014 10:06

I agree with her basic sentiment though, how can anyone afford to live on that? unless partner is a high earner

Damnautocorrect · 18/04/2014 10:08

I'd have to reply
"Wow B that's a brilliant package, just the 6 weeks 90% then £138 a week after that here"

Casmama · 18/04/2014 10:10

YANBU but I don't know why you are on here posting about it rather than joining in the conversation about it where it was taking place Confused

plantsitter · 18/04/2014 10:12

It's still not great though is it? She shouldn't think herself lucky, perhaps you should think yourself un lucky. Don't think we should go around feeling all greatful for being enabled to take time off work to have children. If you want to look at it in a purely economic way, (I don't buy the way) those kids will taxpayers and consumers one day.

Littleturkish · 18/04/2014 10:13

I have friends in the private sector who are on 100% pay for seven months. That is so generous and I am quite envious of them, and it would irritate me if they complained. However, in comparison mine is better than SMP, but I still complain about it (never publicly though- FB isn't the place for this!!) and I suppose many people would see me as ungrateful.

The US does have awful maternity pay though, doesn't it? I'm sure I've seen an infograph that shows it on par with many African countries with regards to its maternity leave packages- which really surprised me.

Trapper · 18/04/2014 10:14

Ponkypink, that surely depends on the agreement the people have with their government. In the UK we trust the government to spend 50% of everything for us and to make decisions about how that money should be spent and what lifestyle choices and medical care it should subsidise. Other countries have agreed their governments take less, but the individual takes more ownership of their lifestyle funding, and have their own insurance policies. Neither is inherently right or wrong IMO.

NancyJones · 18/04/2014 10:19

That was similar to mine but I also felt hard done by as best friend who is a management consultant for one of the 'big 4' got 9mths full pay! In contrast though, DH works for a large American bank and their maternity package is vonsidered quite rubbish by 'city' terms because it's based on US ethos. Likewise holiday entitlement.

SuffolkNWhat · 18/04/2014 10:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HmmAnOxfordComma · 18/04/2014 10:25

Well considering only a decade ago you could only have up to 18 wks off in total (some at 90%, some at SMP depending on your employer), and you had to go back to work leaving a 12-16 wk old in childcare or resign, then I think YANBU.

I agree it shouldn't be a 'race to the bottom' but I think an awful lot of people having their families now don't appreciate how lucky they all are in comparison (no tax credits then either, or only just starting to come in).

sunshinysummer · 18/04/2014 10:25

I also don't think it's that great. It is similar (slightly more) to the maternity pay I received but as most of my friends and my sister were on 6-9 months full pay I felt a bit fed up!

CarmineRose1978 · 18/04/2014 10:54

Ours is 6 weeks at 90% then the rest up to nine months at SMP but we have a really generous incentive payment if we come back, of an extra 25% of our salary for the first year back, to help with child care.

maggiethemagpie · 18/04/2014 11:21

More and more places are just paying SMP now. My company used to pay enhanced, but changed the rules just before I got pregnant! But people generally are only aware of what it's like where they work and can tend to think it's like that everywhere. Public sector tend to pay enhanced but even that is changing now.

nogeybose · 18/04/2014 11:29

No, YANBU! I am so sick of hearing people who live comfortably complain about how hard up they are. Your friend's maternity deal is very generous.
I've come across this so many with people I know complaining they can't afford to stay off work past six months because that's when their deal goes down to SMP. Bullshit. SMP is the norm for most people and let's face it, is basically free money in exchange for no work whatsoever. From experience, I know it's very difficult to live on SMP but you live according to your means, do you not?

Grennie · 18/04/2014 11:32

It is reasonable people complaining about having to live on less money though. It is not easy for many people to do so.

sarinka · 18/04/2014 11:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
ShadowFall · 18/04/2014 11:49

I agree it's reasonable for people to find it difficult to live on a lower income while on maternity leave, even if their maternity leave package is relatively generous.

The bit that really got me was when she said her maternity pay was "poor in comparison". That's just not true, especially in comparison to the US.

She's getting lots more than the UK legal minimum, and I believe that in comparison to most maternity packages in the UK it's generous. And even the legal minimum maternity package in the UK is very very generous in comparison to the legal minimum in the USA.

OP posts:
BEEwitched · 18/04/2014 11:55

It all depends on your perspective, though, doesn't it? My maternity packet is really generous for the UK. Friends & family in Germany have better maternity rights and better maternity pay.

I'd say she's unreasonable to complain about her maternity packet to someone from the US (just like I would be to complain about my UK maternity pay to someone on the standard packet here).

nogeybose · 18/04/2014 12:17

I know what you're saying to a point Grennie, obviously it's not easy for any of us to live on less money than we earned pre-maternity leave.

But we go into this parenting thing with our eyes open. We know we're going to be broke as a joke, even when we go back to work for lots of us. If it was all about the money, no one would ever have kids.

ShadowFall's friend's deal definitely isn't "poor in comparison" with US maternity leave, or with the majority of people in the UK.

Lj8893 · 18/04/2014 12:40

I think we are very lucky to get SMP in this country.

My partner isn't a high earner but we chose to have a baby and knew what we were letting ourselves in for (and it was a surprise pregnancy). We had 9 months to save before I went on ML and we managed ok. Not great, but ok.

Why people complain about getting paid to have a baby is beyond me!!

BolshierAyraStark · 18/04/2014 12:58

Compared to the maternity package my employer provides (6 months full pay 3 months SMP) then it's not great-but it's better than some get.

WooWooo · 18/04/2014 13:49

I suspect that this is more about the fact that she is getting more than you tbh.

Compared to some companies (mine included) her package isn't over generous but compared to just SMP it looks generous.

Most people that I know save before going on maternity leave, as you want the additional maternity leave but can't afford to live on SMP.

CurlyBlueberry · 18/04/2014 13:57

Friend B has written that her maternity package is "poor in comparison" but it's certainly not poor in comparison to most maternity packages in the USA (the place they were discussing along with the UK) so she is just incorrect surely. I can see why you would be annoyed at the way she has put it.

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