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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

about my birthday?

11 replies

OurMiracle1106 · 14/04/2014 11:42

I am planning on going for a meal with my best friend and a couple of other close friends and then maybe for a few drinks. However she lives close to someone she is friends with and who invites herself on nights out with me and my best friend. This person has made it perfectly clear she doesn't like me and I don't particularly want her inviting herself to my birthday (im paying for the meal). However she is likely to invite herself. She is also one of these people that only goes out to get paraletically drunk.

Wibu not to invite her and if she asks make it perfectly clear that it is a select few very close friends only that are invited?

I don't see why I should pay for someone who hasn't been invited to have a meal and get drunk.

OP posts:
Leeds2 · 14/04/2014 11:46

Not unreasonable at all.

Who is she likely to ask if she can come? If it is her friend, you need to make sure that the friend knows that the answer is "no."

Maybe ask everyone not to publicise the event, then hopefully she won't know that it is taking place.

Funnyfoot · 14/04/2014 11:47

YANBU to not want her there.

Just tell your other friend that under no circumstances is it ok for B to come. She is not invited. End of.

Enjoy your birthday Grin

BackforGood · 14/04/2014 11:53

YANBU in the slightest.

Hw would she know ? Confused
Just make the arrangements by phone or text or private message or e-mail, and not in a public domain, and make it clear to your friend, whose friend this is, that it's only the 4 of you, and this other person isn't invited.

Bowlersarm · 14/04/2014 11:58

If she doesn't like you, would she really want to come and celebrate your birthday with you?

Just tell your friend that you don't want her there, and not to invite her.

MamaPain · 14/04/2014 11:59

How on earth could you be unreasonable. It's your birthday and you're paying.

Is let your friend know in case this woman invites herself. If your friend is uncomfortable saying anything just get her to tell the woman she has to speak to you as you are doing arrangements. Then you can tell her where to go

I'm incredibly blunt so I would just say no you can't come because we aren't friends and I don't like you or your behaviour.

OldBagWantsNewBag · 14/04/2014 12:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Latara · 14/04/2014 12:28

YANBU. Make sure your other friends know that she is not to attend your birthday.

I think that you are being really good, paying for them all to come out for your birthday. Surely they should pay for themselves? But that's another issue.

This woman sounds a nightmare and is unlikely to bring you any presents so she definitely shouldn't be at your birthday meal.

Peekingduck · 14/04/2014 12:50

Be specific. "Really looking forward to this! By the way, x is not invited as we really don't get on". Easy.

rollonthesummer · 14/04/2014 12:57

Would your friend invite her? What would she say if the other girl invited herself?

Original poster
OurMiracle1106 · 14/04/2014 14:18

Nope my friend wouldnt invite her. She would tell her she didn't know what restaurant we were going to. And would say she didn't know she was invited because she thought it was my closest friends only

OP posts:
Original poster
OurMiracle1106 · 14/04/2014 14:20

Im paying for them as they have helped me through the last year and my birthday being an excuse it's a little way to say thank you for everything.

I also know these people won't take the piss and expectme to buy drinks all night. It will probably end up in taking turns tbh

OP posts:
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