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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not buy my son toy guns

44 replies

Goldchilled7up · 17/12/2013 22:11

As a threat after school if my 4 year old DS has had a good day, we sometimes go to a local pound shop and let him pick any toy. That's the good thing about this age a £1 toy does the trick Wink

I've noticed that the store keeps having more and more toy guns. DS is fascinated by them and has been wanting me to buy him one, specially today as he could see that other children were buying them. I told him that guns are bad and hurt people, and that although those are only toys, that it's not good to pretend to do something that can seriously hurt people. I believe he understood because he stopped asking and picked another toy.

I'm I being unreasonable? Will this just increase his curiosity?

OP posts:
LindyHemming · 17/12/2013 22:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SPsWantsCliffInHerStocking · 17/12/2013 22:15

He will play guns anyway. Its up to you though.

Guns don't hurt people, the people that use them do.

"Guns don't kill people, rappers do, calling the police"

Grin
Backtobedlam · 17/12/2013 22:17

It's your choice as a parent what toys you buy so YANBU, but I think if he's interested in guns he'll find a way. I've seen DS and his friends use Lego, sticks, foam swords and even a piece of toast as guns!

mousmous · 17/12/2013 22:17

yanbu
I don't buy them either.
but am a bit torn as building catapults and slingshots outside is great fun...

Annunziata · 17/12/2013 22:20

Anything can be a weapon, and anything can be dangerous, will you not let him play cars?

ShylaMcClaus · 17/12/2013 22:22

But a lightsaber with FX. Preferably more than one.

We have one lightsaber and one Harry Potter wand. Duelling against wizards is dull. They always win.

Theincidental · 17/12/2013 22:22

Annunziata,

Cars weren't designed with the intent of being a weapon to kill, guns were.

I'm with you OP. no guns for my Ds.

Mim78 · 17/12/2013 22:24

Up to you entirely. My dm did buy my dd some toy guns for her cowgirl outfit and I didn't really mind. But I do see the logic of the no guns argument.

FortyDoorsToNowhere · 17/12/2013 22:24

Ds has nurf guns, I line empty cans for him to shoot the darts and reset them up.

Yanbu you are his mum and you decide what toys are sutiable

saintmerryweather · 17/12/2013 22:26

letting a kid play with a toy isnt going to turn.them into.a gun toting maniac

what if he picks up a stick to use as a gun? or uses his fingers to shape one?

SatinSandals · 17/12/2013 22:26

I never bought any that looked like real guns, but they make them as people say using Lego, sticks etc.

MyMILisfromHELL · 17/12/2013 22:27

I played with toy guns & guess what? I'm not a mass murderer, I've never shot or killed anyone.

trixymalixy · 17/12/2013 22:30

My SIL did the same as you. My nephew just made guns out of anything he could find. Lego, sticks, you name it.

trixymalixy · 17/12/2013 22:31

In fact I even remember him biting his toast in the shape of a gun!

DramaAlpaca · 17/12/2013 22:32

I had no problem with my DSs having toy guns. As others have said they will make them out of Lego, sticks, cardboard tubes - anything they can get their hands on anyway. The only rule we had in our house was no pointing them at people's faces. All three boys have grown into gentle young men who wouldn't hurt a fly, so I don't think playing with guns did them any harm and they certainly had a lot of fun with them.

I do, however, totally respect your viewpoint if you don't want to allow your child to play with toy guns. You're the parent, so it's your choice.

justtoomessy · 17/12/2013 22:32

I have the rule that if it looks like a real gun you can't have it but you can make a toy gun etc. Does that make sense?!?

Explained to DS 4 that the reason he is not allowed a bought toy gun is that he may come across a real gun but think its a toy one and hurt someone.

MegBusset · 17/12/2013 22:32

I won't buy my DSes toy guns either, it makes me uncomfortable even though I know rationally it's not a huge deal. They occasionally get one free e.g. with a magazine and I let them play with it for a while before it gets 'lost' Wink So I think YANBU.

They did go through a phase of building Lego guns, making stick guns etc but I had a rule that they were only allowed to 'shoot' imaginary baddies, not other people. They're now 4 and 6 and seem less bothered about shooting/guns in general.

CheerfulYank · 17/12/2013 22:35

"As a threat" I snorted water out my nose for some reason. :o

It's a tough one. I didn't let DS have any at first and now he has every kind under the sun. It was just a never ending battle that seemed to have no point as he made everything into a gun anyway.

However, we are American and guns are part of life in our (rural, hunting) area. Which is hard sometimes.

Original poster
Goldchilled7up · 17/12/2013 22:36

Thank you for all your replies. It's good to know that I'm not being unreasonable here, but I understand the perspective that playing with guns won't be harmful long term, I played with them too. But for me it just feels wrong buying it for him, and I think that it's a matter of principle.

This might be hypocrite but I don't mind swords, nowadays people don't go out and kill others with swords, but they do with guns.

OP posts:
notapizzaeater · 17/12/2013 22:36

I really disagreed with guns, and didn't buy them for my ds but he made them out of anything. He (logically) wanted to know why he could have a water pistol but not a gun.

I eventually gave in when he was 10 as all his friends had them.... Tbh I should have done it sooner as he's more obsessed with them now than any of his friends.

drbonnieblossman · 17/12/2013 22:39

if you don't think it's the right thing to do for your ds, stick to your guns.

fwiw, I see no harm in playing with guns and as far as I know there's no correlation between gun crime and playing with you guns as a child. A child's imagination means they will just make one out of something else.

Original poster
Goldchilled7up · 17/12/2013 22:40

Cheerfulyank Grin ups I'm on my phone, I didn't notice my spelling until your post Smile

OP posts:
SatinSandals · 17/12/2013 22:42

I stuck with water pistols, space guns, pop guns etc.

squoosh · 17/12/2013 22:42

To be honest I don't really understand the issue some parents have with toy guns. As others have said kids will fashion guns out of anything they come across, it in no way means they grow up to be gun toting loons.

Guns were part and parcel of life for centuries and children playing make believe with make believe weapons is as old as time.

Cat98 · 17/12/2013 22:45

I don't buy guns for ds and as a result at friends houses what do you think the first thing he makes a beeline for is?
His friends who were allowed them can take or leave them.
Therefore I probably made the wrong call there, but still wouldn't buy one.

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