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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect clean sheets if invited to stay?

57 replies

baggyoldcow · 22/11/2013 09:41

How would you handle this?
You are invited by a friend to stay at their house, "please stay, please stay, we've plenty of room etc, etc". That's very kind of them, of course. So you go, and then they put you in the spare bedroom where the bed has clearly been slept in by someone else and the sheets not changed.
This has happened to us a couple of times (not with the same hosts). I find it very odd as I would never invite someone to stay if I didn't have the time or energy or inclination to offer them a clean bed!
Is it unreasonable to feel put out by this, given they are putting us up?
Is it unreasonable to say something? (Any suggestions as to what?)
Is it unreasonable to wash the sheets oneself while hosts are out?! Wink

OP posts:
SharpLily · 22/11/2013 09:43

Shock That's manky. Sheets MUST be clean.

StealthPolarBear · 22/11/2013 09:44

Urgh

SirChenjin · 22/11/2013 09:44

YANBU - tha bare minimum is washed the sheets, fresh towels and a clean loo if you have visitors to stay, surely??

RevengeWiggle · 22/11/2013 09:45

Clean sheets are a must, why wouldn't you change the sheets? Takes about 5 minutes.

eurochick · 22/11/2013 09:47

That's manky!

Our spare room is in constant use at the moment as we have frequent weekend guests and BIL is staying with us in the week while he finds a house closer to his new job. It's a bit like running a B&B with 2-3 extra loads of sheet and towels per week, but there is no way I would have it otherwise!

EverybodysStressyEyed · 22/11/2013 09:50

You strip the bed and make a joke about them being busy so youve helped out and where can you find the clean sheets

It's rank and they are bad hosts!

This has only happened to me once but i did speak uo and ask for clean sheets

AngelsLieToKeepControl · 22/11/2013 09:52

I had worse. I stayed at a family members and was expected to sleep in a bed where someone had clearly started their period and when I mentioned it I was told 'it's only a bit of blood, sleep on the other side'.

Sadly that wasn't the most disgusting thing I encountered that weekend, I've never been back to visit.

RevengeWiggle · 22/11/2013 09:53

Oh my gosh angels that is vile.

Original poster
baggyoldcow · 22/11/2013 10:04

It's unbelievable, isn't it? I mean if you can't be arsed to change the sheets why invite people?

Angels that is appalling.

OP posts:
Trills · 22/11/2013 10:06

YANBU at all.

HeirToTheIronThrone · 22/11/2013 10:06

Hmm. I will admit that, if the spare bed has only been slept in for one night by one person - my DM for example - and there is someone else coming to stay soon after, I do tend to air and smooth it out and remake it... But anything other than the 1 and 1 policy and I would always change the sheets!

areyoutheregoditsmemargaret · 22/11/2013 10:07

I'm the laziest housekeeper in the world, or thought I was until this. But even I would change sheets/out clean towels out etc.

Angel, what else did you encounter??

Crowler · 22/11/2013 10:09

That's so gross. Sleeping is an intimate kind of thing. I do not want to be in a bed where anyone has been. Gross.

Trills · 22/11/2013 10:09

It also depends on the people, their relationship to one another, and how much you think they would care.

If my mum had slept in a bed for one night, and then my brother was coming to stay, that might be OK.

If my brother had slept in a bed for one night, and then someone unrelated was coming to stay, I would definitely change the sheets.

MintyChops · 22/11/2013 10:11

So lazy and thoughtless/dirty.

Angels that is dreadful

EverybodysStressyEyed · 22/11/2013 10:12

My bil and sil had slept in the bed before us and mil thought it would be ok as they arefamily. Er, no thanks. Especially as they were going throught their 'at it like rabbits' phase. Bleurgh

Bumpsadaisie · 22/11/2013 10:14

yanbu. This is horrid!

Perhaps I wouldn't mind if it were my sister's bed and she told me she'd only slept in it a couple of times. But otherwise NO!

AngelsLieToKeepControl · 22/11/2013 10:17

areyou I warn you, it is disgusting.

They had a large breed dog, and no garden, they had a room in the house where the dog would go to shit, apparently they just ripped the carpet up every few months and replaced it. I went to put dishes in the dishwasher and it was fill of mouldy plates, last but not least I went to top up their electric meter, when I opened the cupboard a swarm of flies flew out, there was a decomposed rat or mouse in there. It must have been in there for weeks, if not longer.

MoreGin · 22/11/2013 10:28

Ewww god no. Imagine the dribble on the pillow for starters.

Crowler · 22/11/2013 10:36

Angels! This house needs to be condemned! I hope you don't go back.

Crowler · 22/11/2013 10:36

MoreGin - I'm feeling a bit delicate today so please no more of that. :-)

PosyNarker · 22/11/2013 10:37

To be honest, I'd just say 'where are your sheets, I'll change the bed' as though I thought they just hadn't got round to it.

RevengeWiggle · 22/11/2013 10:42

angels why did you stay? I would have left after one of those discoveries!

areyoutheregoditsmemargaret · 22/11/2013 10:43

Oh good lord, angels! So the bloody sheets were nothing in the scheme of things Shock

Rockinhippy · 22/11/2013 10:44

YADNBU, i wouldnt dream of doing this, your friends are skanks - yuk

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