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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DS savings account

39 replies

ToQuackOrNotToQuack · 30/08/2013 19:59

Dp and I would like to set up a savings account for ds - dp has been looking at the options and the one he wants us to set up is at his bank which means only he can control withdrawals etc.

Am I being ridiculously unreasonable to be upset at this. I know it's a long time before Ds wants needs money but I already find it uneasy that ds and I have different surnames. Maybe that's why. I'd just like to know I'd be able to help ds control the account as he gets older not have to keep running to dp.

OP posts:
toomuchtoask · 30/08/2013 20:00

Don't you trust your DP?

MimiSunshine · 30/08/2013 20:02

What bank won't let you be a joint account holder?

Unless its a Santander account and you don't meet their credit check threshold (which is quite high) in which case just tell him you don't want to use that bank and find one yourself which allows joint account holders

raggedmum · 30/08/2013 20:03

How old is your DS? Most bank accounts are held in the parent's name till the child is 16/18.

Original poster
ToQuackOrNotToQuack · 30/08/2013 20:04

I do trust him is just it takes him an age to do anything so I can the frustrating conversations in years to come but I think I'm probably being very silly

OP posts:
MimiSunshine · 30/08/2013 20:04

And Rory off topic but why are you uneasy about your DS having a different surname? Surely it was your choice as you registered him with that name?

MimiSunshine · 30/08/2013 20:05

Rory? Meant to be sorry

Original poster
ToQuackOrNotToQuack · 30/08/2013 20:06

Its a lloyds account apparently it's linked to the adults current account. He's only one so I'm thinking way ahead I know. Is it always in just one parents name rather than both for children?

OP posts:
MimiSunshine · 30/08/2013 20:10

So then just find another account that you can both access and tell him you'd prefer to use that, if he asks why just say you'd feel happier with that situation.
If he's done all the research then don't be surprised if he picks the one easier for him to manage

PoppyWearer · 30/08/2013 20:12

Is the account going to be in your DH's name or in your DS's name but with your DH as the responsible adult?

I am the responsible adult for our DCs' accounts (child trust fund and junior ISA, pensions) because I am the parent who has the time to deal with all of the admin.

DH is our sole earner currently but he trusts me to look after our DCs' accounts.

Do you trust your DP?

OTTMummA · 30/08/2013 20:12

If you have a birth certificate proving you are actually his mother I can not see why you can not be on the account as well.

OTTMummA · 30/08/2013 20:13

My DS trust fund was set up as me being the co account holder despite not having the same last name for the first year.
That is with nationwide.

AnyFucker · 30/08/2013 20:14

Why don't you set up a Baby Bond type of thing (if they are still called that) in joint names.

Although tbh, this kind of kerfuffle is why I wanted to be married before I had kids. As much as I am a raging feminist, it makes life a lot easier to all have the same name, and I am all for life being easier.

Cabrinha · 30/08/2013 20:30

My daughter and I have different names - my choice, I never changed mine (luckily, as I'm divorcing now!)
We have a bank account that is joint - a specifically "junior saver" account.
Don't fret, just go and open an account! As I already had my own current account with the bank, I think I only needed her birth certificate.
Then just tell your H you had a free moment do you've done it. If he starts insisting it should be in his name, then you have a problem to address.

pianodoodle · 30/08/2013 20:34

DH opened a little savers account at the bank he works for but it's only a matter of me filling out a form and I can get my name added. Maybe get your DP to double check with his bank in case you can do the same?

We have a trust fund where only one person can be the "registered contact" but that makes little odds as no one can withdraw money from those except the child when they reach a certain age.

ilovepowerhoop · 30/08/2013 20:42

I opened the accounts for my children and am the person that can access the accounts as I am the named adult that the statements are sent to. Dh would not be able to access them as he is not a party to the account.

ilovepowerhoop · 30/08/2013 20:43

p.s. the accounts are in the names of the children but I am the named person/adult that runs the accounts until the children are old enough to run them themselves They are with LTSB too.

HappyAsASandboy · 30/08/2013 20:46

DH are both 'authorised adults' on our DCs accounts.

I don't think it is about a lack of trust in your DH, it's just sensible that you're both signatories.

Halifax will give you a savings account for DC with two signatories without either banking there individually.

If your DH insists, I would worry he has a reason to want se access.

HappyAsASandboy · 30/08/2013 20:47

Sorry, that should have said sole access ....

MissStrawberry · 30/08/2013 20:48

At our bank the accounts were opened in the child's name with me being the adult named. When they reached 7 we could change it to just their name. We haven't.

mashpot · 30/08/2013 20:54

The different surnames thing is totally irrelevant. Me and DH (different surnames) are both 'trustees' on DS' account. It was with Northern Rock but that is now Virgin. I prefer us both being able to access the money if absolutely necessary

treaclesoda · 30/08/2013 21:04

I am the named adult on both our dc s savings accounts, it has never occurred to me that dh might object it, it just happened to be me who went to the bank and spent an opened them, its no big deal tl us. Have you told your dp that you object, is he aware of how you feel about it?

Alternatively, why not open another account with your name on the account, and put half in each?

treaclesoda · 30/08/2013 21:05

argh, auto correct nightmare above. Blush

Fairyegg · 30/08/2013 21:12

It would make me feel uneasy as well. Just open one up using both your names.

StephenFrySaidSo · 30/08/2013 21:15

instead of being upset about it OP how about you just don't agree to it? you don't have to you know- you have other options.

rootypig · 30/08/2013 21:17

Get DS his own account, the money will be his when he's 18 and noone else's, ever.