to think that telling someone that you can't understand

[stillbusy84]

Why you had dc with them in the 1st place isn't helpful.
Just that really. So often people post about issues with dh/dp and they are told this.
Aibu to think this isn't helpful.

It isn't helpful but sometimes people are really confused and can't understand why. If someone doesn't wash up before kids they don't magically become Martha Stewart after. Ir worse behaviour.

Was it to you or another poster or in RL?

Ir = Or

oh you mean when people say "why did you have children with this man?"

I agree, it's not helpful. it's not as if the dcs can be sent back to where they came from.

but I do wonder sometimes when someone posts about how their partner has always been like this why they thought things would change when dcs came along. ive never posted it though because it's not helpful

Actually it gets people thinking about their relationship. If they had children with them unintentionally or to patch a hole that's different to doing it because they were both ready and wanted to.

It was from other threads on here. Comes up fairly frequently. Although i guess i now fall into that category too mrstp (smile)

Oops. Still not worked how to do smiley face.

like this [ smile ] without spaces. I thought I was totes amusing on your other thread with that!