Dear Compromisingannie's Husband,
You need to decide where your loyalties lie - your wife and son, or your parents. Actually it is pretty clear that you have absolutely no respect for your wife, or loyalty towards her. When your mother DELIBERATELY failed to give your wife a meal, you should have stood up for your wife, and told your mother that this was beyond rude, and you will not allow her to treat your wife and the mother of your child with such disrespect!
You should not be allowing everyone else to be held to ransom by your parents' unreasonable and inflexible demands to see your child without his mother even when he was a premature newborn (did you have NO care for your child's welfare?) - an elderly lady should not have to reschedule her 95th birthday party to fit in with your parents' inflexibility - and your wife SHOULD have had FOUR Mothers' Days where she has been the centre of attention - instead of which she has been sidelined and excluded on what should have been a special day for her because you put your parents and their demands first, second, third, and your wife's needs NOWHERE!
Do you want to be a grown up, with a family of your own, or do,you want to be a pampered princeling in your parents' home? I would like to think that you would want the first option, though history is not on the side of that assumption. Be that as it may, IF you want to be a man with a family of his own, you need to man up, grow a pair and start putting your family first. You are doing your son no favours, and you are risking your whole marriage if you carry on like this.
Stand up for your wife. Demand that your parents, and particularly your mother, treat her with respect - and if they don't, then you need to withdraw all but the most minimal of contact until they decide to behave decently.
Show your wife you love her, and are willing to put her and your son first.
Do it now, before it is too late.
Yours,
SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius