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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to consider sending DC to a Catholic school although I'm an atheist?

103 replies

YoniSingWhenYoureWinning · 07/07/2013 23:12

but its exam results are streets ahead of any other school in the area! So good that I think I could let Jesus into my life in spite of not believing in Him...

OP posts:
ParadiseChick · 07/07/2013 23:14

Yabu

merlincat · 07/07/2013 23:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

brilliantwhite · 07/07/2013 23:14

i went as far as getting my kids christened to get them into a school and im an atheist , so dont feel too bad.

brilliantwhite · 07/07/2013 23:15

see you in hell merlincat .

JakeBullet · 07/07/2013 23:15

Yabu

CocacolaMum · 07/07/2013 23:16

I would do it if it meant the best school

merlincat · 07/07/2013 23:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mymatemax · 07/07/2013 23:16

yanbu Unless of course you are going to complain about the school being "too religious" onc ehe is there.
You know what you're signing up for!

KnittedWaffle · 07/07/2013 23:17

YABU
If it's a strict faith school there'll be all sorts of religious aspects to the day that your DC will not be familiar with. Plus, if you don't believe in what is essentially the foundation of the school - its ethos etc - why would you want your DC to go there? (Exam results aside)

JakeBullet · 07/07/2013 23:18

Why why why when the whole ethos is based on something you don't believe in?

Fact is that you are parents who are interested and committed to your children's education, they would do well in most schools simply because they have YOU behind them to help. You don't need to compromise your principles at all.

EllieArroway · 07/07/2013 23:19

You can't get more atheist than me (I am actively anti-theist) but my son went to religious primary schools. I had no choice & until this country figures out that religion should play no part in state education, quite a few of us atheists are in the same position.

You're not being a hypocrite simply for taking up your child's right to a free education.

But (in a friendly, non-combative way) opt them out of the heavy duty religious crap (if there is any) and don't feel even slightly awkward in making it clear that you are an atheist and will bring up your child to make their own minds up. You'll find most staff don't give two hoots.

AuntieStella · 07/07/2013 23:19

For Catholicism, you'll have to be received into the church before your DC can be baptised. It's much harder to fake than other denominations.

Have you actually looked at what preparation that entails? And is time of DC baptism part of the supplementary form?

littleginger · 07/07/2013 23:20

I understand why why a religious poster will think its U as it undermines their faith.

However catholic schools get shitloads of funding from government so why should op have to put dc is a school that isnt as good?

I dislike faith schools receiving any government funding. Im lucky i dont live in an area where this is the case so i dont have to go through with a christening as my religious parents wish.

IMO YANBU

volvocowgirl · 07/07/2013 23:21

I went to a Catholic School and received a brilliant education - 11 GSCES, which in the early nineties was a lot in our area (most schools did 8ish). I also learnt the importance of respecting myself through relationship advice (seeing as they didn't want to stress the sex part of sex education). I also learnt about many different religions and cultures, having everything from a Quran to Buddhist art symbols in the RE classroom. We also had more emphasis on the religion as a community rather than religion a control. I'm not a religious person but it gave me faith in other people.

1944girl · 07/07/2013 23:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

volvocowgirl · 07/07/2013 23:22

Oh, and my parents aren't Catholics either, which was going to be my original point (!) so YANBU.

FunkyNails · 07/07/2013 23:24

I went to catholic school (I'm catholic) a large proportion of my class weren't religious and this didn't seem to cause any problems but you were expected to be part of all events. There will be a strong religious content at the school so be prepared for that to be part of school life, anything you attend from concerts to parents evening and DC will probably do more RE than other schools (must say I liked this as it meant less PE Grin

squoosh · 07/07/2013 23:25

Go ahead but don't then be one of those posters who starts threads about your outrage that they're teaching your kids to say prayers and everything is just a bit too God focussed.

EndoplasmicReticulum · 07/07/2013 23:25

I'm an atheist and my children are at a CofE primary. There was no choice though, as all the other local schools are also CofE. Choice was CofE village primary or long drive to nearest non-CofE option.

Inertia · 07/07/2013 23:27

Given the degree to which most religious schools take advantage of large amounts of state funding to promote their faith and offer places only to a carefully chosen few, I'm inclined to think that parents should make the system work to their advantage as best they can.

fancyanother · 07/07/2013 23:28

I am Catholic, I was brought up a Catholic, went to Catholic schools yada yada. I've always had "ishoos" with the church but, like you, wanted my DC to go to the Catholic school because it had good results and well, we were Catholic. Since my DC have been at the school, my church has become really quite hardcore. I am finding it more and more difficult to justify my being there. I feel trapped in a faith I no longer believe in by my decision to put my child into a school he now loves. I don't know if I even believe in God anymore, but feel trapped in a charade. It's so much more than 'finding God". It involves listening to the teachings of quite a strict religion and knowing your child is learning the same, quite frequently. What about C of E??

GoshAnneGorilla · 07/07/2013 23:28

What squoosh said.

Also, if the school is that good, I'd be surprised if you got in.

Our local Catholic school makes it very clear that they view religious education and activities as an integral part of school life and there is no opting out.

BrianTheMole · 07/07/2013 23:28

I couldn't do it, I'd feel like a huge fraud. C of E I could, but I was brought up with that, and although I have strayed from it, I would feel comfortable with dc and myself being part of it.

Tommy · 07/07/2013 23:30

you won't be able to opt out of religious stuff in a Catholic school.
Your choice but, of course, your child may love it and ask to be baptised....you have to be ready for that Grin

Whippetwarmer · 07/07/2013 23:38

I went to a rc primary school for 6 years and I loved it. The nuns were great and we did loads of really creative projects and lots of outdoor learning. BUT there was an awful lot of religious stuff too. From year 4 onwards we would spend a large section of time every day reading aloud from the Old Testament, and the nuns would drum it into us that we would burn in hell if we had sex before marriage etc. there would definitely be no way your child could attend a rc school and 'opt out' of the religious stuff, you'd have to accept that. I am not religious now as an adult and my parents weren't at all religious when I was a child and I don't think enduring all the bible reading and trips to church etc when I was younger did me any harm. It was a very caring environment.