Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

About Father's Day cards from nursery

21 replies

ShadowStorm · 13/06/2013 22:53

Today, DS came home from nursery with a Father's Day card decorated by DS, and a separate poem about fathers on another bit of card with footprints and handprints. These are lovely, and I'm sure DH will be very happy to receive them.

The thing is - when it was Mother's Day, there wasn't any sort of DS made item from nursery. Except an early Easter card, and I don't think that could really be counted as a Mother's Day card when it had Happy Easter stickers plastered all over it.

I suspect I'm probably being a bit pathetic here, but AIBU to be feeling a bit left out and Sad about nursery not having done anything for Mother's Day when they've done 2 separate things (card + poem) for Father's Day?

OP posts:
Finola1step · 13/06/2013 22:58

Erm... YADBU.

Who knows why they didn't make Mothers Day bits and bobs. Maybe they did and your son's creation got mislaid.

How lovely that nursery have saved you the trouble of having to make something this weekend. Let your ds and dh enjoy the day.

LindyHemming · 13/06/2013 23:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

marriedinwhiteagain · 13/06/2013 23:04

YABU. But mothers day is equidistant between ash wednesday and easter Sunday so I don't see how it could have clashed with Easter. Did you DH do nothing?

MaMattoo · 13/06/2013 23:07

Yabu. It's not like your child decided when and whom to make a card for....

Original poster
ShadowStorm · 13/06/2013 23:09

No idea whether there are any motherless children at the nursery, Euphemia, but I guess that might explain it.

OP posts:
justmyview · 13/06/2013 23:11

Sorry, another YABU here too, I'm afraid. I think the most likely explanation is different staff member, new box of craft stuff just arrived etc ie not a personal slight. Or Mother's Day might have been a sensitive topic for another child (parents just separated) so they played it down

Oldraver · 13/06/2013 23:13

DS's pre-school did Mother and Father's Day cards, so no YANBU

His is now in Y2 and they have still done cards...We were given the Mothers Day cards in the playground the Monday after as his teacher forgot to send then home Shock

honeytea · 13/06/2013 23:19

Yabu, there could well be a child who has lost their mother recently. It sounds like they did a craft activity around mothers day so the children with mums had something to give their mums but without leaving a motherless child with a obvious mothers day card and no one to give it to.

Didn't your dp get your craft stuff out and make a mothers day card? :(

Casmama · 13/06/2013 23:19

I don't think Yabu at all. If they do it for Father's Day then it should be done for Mother's Day otherwise it sends the wrong message to parent and child.

Original poster
ShadowStorm · 13/06/2013 23:21

And no, DH did not get out any craft stuff and help DS make a Mother's Day card. Although he did buy a nice box of chocolates for DS to give me.

OP posts:
longingforsomesleep · 13/06/2013 23:39

I don't think they should do it for either. Used to really annoy me when my kids were in primary. Off the top of my head I can think of 2 mums and 1 dad who died and several kids who rarely saw one of their parents. I don't think the pleasure of receiving a hand made card is worth the knowledge that some poor kids will have made them knowing they weren't going to be able to hand them over.

LondonBus · 13/06/2013 23:47

YABU

Many nurseries avoid fathers day all together. Too many small children these days have lost contact with their fathers by the age of three, and making a card for "the significant male in your life" is all a bit..well, how do nursery staff even know if there is a male in their lives if mum drops off and collects every day......

Nurseries are busy places, and if they overlooked making a mothers day card, then you need to get over it. Or maybe your DS did 't wan't to cooperate providing a hand print that day.

FredFredGeorge · 13/06/2013 23:48

If you want made stuff from your child on mothers day, tell your partner, your child, or your nursery. Don't assume everyone else knows you want it, the nursery's decisions on what to do are not about you, they're purely thinking "how can we entertain/occupy/keep quiet/teach a load of kids today?"

YABU to moan or feel left out, if you want it, tell the people who can make it happen next time. Then be unhappy if they don't.

WafflyVersatile · 14/06/2013 00:23

Well whatever the reason I'm sure it wasn't personal.

Startail · 14/06/2013 00:44

We always did pretty unisex Mother's Day gifts at brownies, sweets, rosettes, your own picture rather than pink flowers so the little girl who's mum had died could do something for her dad instead.

Oh and please tell me to go to bed, I said good night in a PM an hour ago!

MorganMummy · 14/06/2013 00:57

I was very surprised today to be handed a card that DS had "made" for his dad. They have us on record as primary carer one and two at the same address so I am assuming they checked who should be making cards for whom but still I think there is a lot of potential for upset for children and I'd avoid marking both days if I were in charge. DS wasn't at nursery when Mothering Sunday happened, but I have managed to bully my husband into making a card with DS for me. nothing says 'I love you' like a coerced card, I feel! Grin

HullMum · 14/06/2013 04:22

thats kind of wierd. Im sure they just got sidetracked and didnt bother. Not some weird anti mother thing

DumSpiroSpero · 14/06/2013 06:22

Tricky really. I would wonder too, but equally will never forget the little girl in my class at school who once made a 'Happy 'acting' Mother's Day' card for her dad - as her mum had walked out on them when she was a baby Sad .

I work at a nursery and we have 'Special Ladies' and Special Mans' days on the Friday nearest to mums and dads days. Today we'll have dads, grand dads, uncles, big brothers etc in and there will be a choice of activities for them to do together so no one has to make cards which might be upsetting/inappropriate.

HollyBerryBush · 14/06/2013 07:41

I always wondered if this was an urban myth (the banning of a particular card). Whilst there has to be a certain amount of sensitivity to certain situations, I really don't see that it can be put into practice otherwise there would be no mention of any one of anything that might offend someones sensibilities.

EG, carpet time (or what ever it's called these days. I always felt my children have been disadvantaged from having no grandparents, but I certainly wouldn't think the mere mention of them should be banned in storytelling because someone went on holiday with theirs IYSWIM. That's just an aspect of life. Some people have certain relationships and family members, others don't.

ParadiseChick · 14/06/2013 07:52

Choice! Kids get the choice!

My charming son didn't make me a mother's day card one year, the house corner was more appealing.

Yonididnaedaethat · 14/06/2013 08:09

Agree with Paradise, it's about choice. Who's to say the nursery didn't make Mother day cards, it could just be your DS was happier doing outside play or whatever Smile

New posts on this thread. Refresh page