Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell them to take this off Facebook

56 replies

justinhawkinsnavalfluff · 21/05/2013 22:36

My DS is in primary school. One of the mums has set up a Facebook page so parents can share information. I have no problem with this, in fact I think this is really good idea. However the mum who set it up has posted a picture of all of the children on the page without seeking any parents permission. I am furious - is it really that much to expect someone I don't know v well to check they have permission to post a picture of my DS for the world to see!?!?

OP posts:
ThreeBeeOneGee · 21/05/2013 22:40

Is it a group or a page?

If it's a page then that's open to the public and so I don't think she should have posted the photo.

If it's a group, then it's possible to set it to a closed / secret group; members join by invitation only and only members can see the contents.

ThreeBeeOneGee · 21/05/2013 22:42

In my opinion, a page would be more suitable for a business or organisation. A group is more appropriate for school parents to share information.

Original poster
justinhawkinsnavalfluff · 21/05/2013 22:42

I am not part of the group yet and found it by fairly simple search. It's the picture attached to the name so everyone can see it when they search.

OP posts:
Original poster
justinhawkinsnavalfluff · 21/05/2013 22:43

I think it's just a page at the moment though I am a bit of a fbook idiot!

OP posts:
EarthtoMajorTom · 21/05/2013 22:43

How is this likely (and note the word likely) to be a problem for you/your DS?

maxpower · 21/05/2013 22:44

Yanbu if it makes you uncomfortable

ThreeBeeOneGee · 21/05/2013 22:44

If it's a group then she needs to change the settings and should certainly have done so before posting a photo. If she's left it that open, then you can probably join, make yourself an administrator and then change the settings yourself to make it closed, secret and invitation only.

Original poster
justinhawkinsnavalfluff · 21/05/2013 22:46

My work background is child protection I accept i am a bit anal about e safety. That's why I am trying to gauge whether AIBU.

OP posts:
Original poster
justinhawkinsnavalfluff · 21/05/2013 22:47

Thankyou ThreeBeeOneGee that sounds like a good idea

OP posts:
IneedAyoniNickname · 21/05/2013 22:48

When we signed the it agreement at school (which we have to sign to let dc use computer's) there is a bit which says we will not put pics of other peoples children online. Most parents ignore it though.

Tbh if its a problem for you, then ask them to remove it.

WilsonFrickett · 21/05/2013 22:49

Ok, I get that she should have checked before putting a photo up. But honestly, what harm do you think will come to your DS from having a photo on Facebook of him in a school context?

JoyMachine · 21/05/2013 22:50

YANBU- tell her to remove it pronto- she has no idea of the background of most of those children- they could be LAC, adopted, witness protection, escaping DV etc.

There is absolutely no need whatsoever to publish the children's photos. I would be warning the school too, as they will be well aware which children have restrictions over photos being taken.

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 21/05/2013 22:50

The school might want the page owner to take the photo down as I would assume she has no way of knowing whether or not any of the children need their identity protecting?

Original poster
justinhawkinsnavalfluff · 21/05/2013 22:51

I don't want to seem like a killjoy but I think I'm going to have to raise it.

OP posts:
ThreeBeeOneGee · 21/05/2013 22:52

Can I suggest that you use this opportunity to become more confident with Fb and its settings. You don't say what age your son is, but 13 comes around very quickly! Smile

WorraLiberty · 21/05/2013 22:52

I think it's just a page at the moment though I am a bit of a fbook idiot!

My work background is child protection I accept i am a bit anal about e safety. That's why I am trying to gauge whether AIBU.

Well which is it? Confused

If you're anal about E safety, then you should know about facebook/how it works/privacy etc.

I'm always amazed at the amount of people with FB accounts (and whose children have them) and yet they haven't bothered to take a tutorial and get to know about how it works.

But YANBU if it's not a members only group, she should have asked permission. It's only polite.

WilsonFrickett · 21/05/2013 22:53

Ok I'd forgotten the point about LAC etc Blush

JoyMachine · 21/05/2013 22:54

Even if it's a members-only group, there are plenty of children for whom any photos on any social media is a complete no-no.

Original poster
justinhawkinsnavalfluff · 21/05/2013 22:54

Fbook tutorial here I come!

OP posts:
JoyMachine · 21/05/2013 22:55

Can you give us a clue which part of the country, in case it's one of our DC's schools? Grin

500internalerror · 21/05/2013 22:57

Scouts do this too - open fb page with photos on, but nothing named or tagged so far. I was a bit surprised to be honest!

Original poster
justinhawkinsnavalfluff · 21/05/2013 22:59

WorraLiberty I have always taken the view that I post nothing that would identify my children and certainly no photos. My personal page is friends only.

OP posts:
Birdsgottafly · 21/05/2013 23:05

We had a Governers meeting today and it was combined with other parent involvement groups (SN school under special measures). It has been decided to go over to Twitter, instead of FB.

FB is causing all sorts of problems for schools and children who cannot be identified. The rules for using FB for schools, needs to be discussed with parents, so it sounds as though a meeting is in order, to go over the rules.

ThreeBeeOneGee · 21/05/2013 23:08

About a week after DS3 went on Cub camp, I came across a picture of him in a group in the local paper (he and some other boys had found a painting in a hedge that turned out to be valuable).

At no point did anyone ask my permission, or even mention that he'd had his photo taken. He is 8 and oblivious, so he didn't think to mention it. His name wasn't mentioned, but along with the photo the article did mention the name of the pack and our village, and was also published online.

In DS3's case, no harm done, but if I'd (for example) had to move to a different town and change my surname to escape an abusive ex (as an acquaintance has had to do) then this would have caused me anxiety.

McBalls · 21/05/2013 23:08

Where has she got the pictures from?