To want to train some big strong dogs so...

[TiggyD]

...I can stand on them, one foot on each of the 2 big dogs (great danes?), like roller-skates. I would then train those 2 dogs to stand on 8 medium sized dogs (Collies? Labradoodles?) who would in turn be standing on 32 tiddly little buggers (yorkies?).

A lot of effort, but I think the ride quality would be excellent.

AIBU?

Just thought...

...the bottom dogs could be those ugly hairless ones because the ones at the bottom would obviously get the dirtiest and would need to be easy to clean.

Looks like it's only me and Leverette who have ever thought about this.

But...but... surely the big dogs should be at the bottom?

If the little ones were at the top you would be putting your weight on 2 little dogs. The way I'm suggesting the weight would be spread between 32 little dogs.
And the 32 big dogs would have to be spread apart so far the medium dogs would have trouble reaching them to stand on them, ditto the little dogs on the mediums.

I've not just made this up you know. There's science involved.

Steal my boxer dog.

Please?

He would enjoy that. He would also fart a lot and inadvertently gas you to death but he'd enjoy that.

Can you tell I'm sick of retching every time the stupid dog enters the room and let's one rip?