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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be concerned about school that let's a 4 yr old get the wrong bus home

31 replies

plim · 03/05/2013 20:08

Ds and dd go to a great primary school, outstanding ofsted (not that that means much these days) great head t and all together very happy with it. Yesterday one of my sons friends from reception class got off at our bus stop (rural village and bus stop on side of road next to a farm ie lots of tractors and farm traffic). Two other mums were also at pick up and we all assumed one of the others was taking him for a play date until we realised he wasn't with anyone! After s massive panic we took him to ours and I called his mum who was on vm and the school. He got on the wrong bus - not sure how he managed it as they put them in lines with bus captains, school said he told them he was coming for tea at our house so they let him go!!! His mum and dad were fuming and the school met with them this morning and the head has said it shouldn't have happened but the best he can do is to do a bus register and that the boy took it upon himself to change buses. They usually ask for letters for play dates but how on earth did this happen? 4 years old and dropped off on the side if the road. God knows what would have happened if we weren't there. So now very worried about my two on the bus (although they are hopefully not silly enough to pull one like this) I'm thinking of taking them off it...

OP posts:
FutTheShuckUp · 03/05/2013 20:10

I personally wouldn't be happy for my four year old to go to a school that requires them to go on a school bus period.

HollyBerryBush · 03/05/2013 20:14

Is this in the UK?

CoolStoryBro · 03/05/2013 20:14

My friend's son got put on the wrong bus the first day of Kindergarten. He just thought he was on one big adventure. The school went into Damage Control big time, but as far as I know, it hasn't happened again.

I would also be furious if it was my child too.

CoolStoryBro · 03/05/2013 20:15

Futthe my kids LOVE going on the bus. It makes them feel all grown up!

HollyBerryBush · 03/05/2013 20:15

Actually I dont believe any school would let a nursery/reception pupil out to get the bus alone.

toomuchtoask · 03/05/2013 20:15

They accepted the word of a 4 year old that he was going for tea somewhere else? Oh dear. They should have rang his parents. It's a good job you knew the number of the Mum. What would have happened otherwise? This needs major sorting.

decaffwithcream · 03/05/2013 20:20

I don't think they could "let" a 4 year old get the wrong bus, I would say they put him on it.

I assume after this incident they will not be taking a young child's word for it that he is going on a different bus.

I also assume the driver would not have actually dropped a 4 year old off if no adults were there.

And that a group of adults or even one adult would not manage to leave the bus stop without noticing that a small child is there on his own.

Original poster
plim · 03/05/2013 20:20

It's the uk. All the rural schools here (out in stix) have a school bus service. Most are only 2-3 mile routes and they're mini buses that pull up in the car park and the children are chaperoned on in a queue.

OP posts:
cumfy · 03/05/2013 23:08

What does DS say ?

CloudsAndTrees · 03/05/2013 23:23

I wouldn't let my dc go on a school bus. The school I work at has one and the staff that manage it each day are meticulous, but there will always be room for something to go wrong somewhere, especially with children so young. I think it's a service best used by the older children tbh.

EnidRollins · 03/05/2013 23:59

School kids being put on a bus aged 4 years old and expected to get off where and whenever, as well as being put on the bus just because they'd said they were off somewhere for tea?
Did they not even think to CHECK that?!
Leaving aside the whole it's absolutely wrong at that age to even be put on a bus at that age in my opinion.
My youngest's 5, and there's no way on this earth he'd be going on a bus by himself.
At that age at our school, they have to be collected from the classroom door. Which is the way it should be.

bubbles1231 · 04/05/2013 00:05

Enid If you live in a rural area and the school is several miles away, how are the children of parents without cars supposed to get to school?

casawasa · 04/05/2013 00:09

I think the OP means a School Bus. Not just a public service bus. Many, many kids around the country in rural areas get to school by school bus. This includes my son who from age 5 has been picked up and dropped off by the school bus. Would it be better if 14 sets of parents drove the 10 miles to his school every morning and back twice a day with their PFBs in their cars?

Clearly in this case the school made a mistake.

VerySmallSqueak · 04/05/2013 00:14

If you are in a rural area it is quite normal for children to go by bus,and yes,as young as four.It's all very well saying you wouldn't let your children do that,but as bubbles says if you don't drive or don't have a car there isn't really much option.

I would be very annoyed about this and would want a meeting with the headteacher.They should be putting forward solutions to this to make sure it doesn't happen again.There should be no room left for error with a 4 year old and they should be escorted onto the bus.
Any change in plan should be notified in writing.

EnidRollins · 04/05/2013 00:26

Enid If you live in a rural area and the school is several miles away, how are the children of parents without cars supposed to get to school?

Ok, can appreciate that as I grew up in a rural area and children in the next village had to be bussed in.
Easy to forget being in a big town/city now though!
Even so, though, they put a 4 year old on a bus on the say so of the 4 year old just because he said he was off for tea at someone else's house?!
They never even thought to QUERY that and check it was right?!
I'd be fuming.

Purplebananas · 04/05/2013 00:56

A 4 year old on a bus alone? WTAF. One of the parents should get the bus with him.

Startail · 04/05/2013 01:26

School need notes or phone calls from parents about play dates not the word of KS1 DCs, just as Brownies do if someone different is collecting.

We only have one bus so mix ups between buses don't happen. The odd mixup about going not going on the bus probably does. As does this dippy mother forgetting after school clubs and turning up early.

mam29 · 04/05/2013 03:06

maybe im just old. but my 1st school was village primary and we lived rural had mini bus which dropped me and neighbour oustide our house and parents waved bus off. oddly cant remember getting on school bus at school end. only went there for infants as moved to a town.

1st day reception mam made dad follow the school bus.

i would be angry too.

In states school buses common.

i do hate the school run.often say wish there was a bus.

Cerisier · 04/05/2013 03:44

Taking the word of a four year old? Noooooo, I can't believe the school did this. Thank goodness it ended well.

Our school has loads of rules about buses for the under 11s- no one can go on a different bus to normal full stop. So if you are going to play at someone else's house straight from school a parent has to go and pick up from the school. Also a form has to be filled in by a parent giving permission for another parent to pick up a child. It seems completely over the top, but it does mean situations like this don't happen.

marcopront · 04/05/2013 06:47

Has anyone asked the four your old why he said he was going to your house for tea? Yes the school should have checked but why would he say that?

SwishSwoshSwoosh · 04/05/2013 06:55

Buses in rural areas, totally normal. Otherwise how would any kids in the outlying villages get to school?

Changing the bus a child gets without written confirmation from a parent or without a phonecall to check is exceptionally bad practice and will presumably result in a tightening of procedures.

Tee2072 · 04/05/2013 07:15

I don't live in a rural area but there is a bus for my son to take when he starts in September.

But the going home bus has a teaching assistant on it for the younger kids so just such a thing can't happen as the kids are given directly to their adult, they don't just stream off the bus willy nilly.

MiaowTheCat · 04/05/2013 07:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Booboostoo · 04/05/2013 08:34

Shouldn't there be an escort on the bus to deal with any issues such young children may have during the journey and to ensure the right adult was available to pick up the child at the bus stop? Presumably all sorts of things can go wrong like a parent who is late to pick up, so does the driver just deposit the 4 year olds at the bus stop and drive away?

Tricycletops · 04/05/2013 08:44

My first primary school had buses, in a big city. We were marshalled in the hall at the end of the day under big signs with the route number on or (in my case) NO BUS. I do remember one of the boys in my class deciding he fancied a trip on a bus more than waiting for his mum, and being escorted back to NO BUS pretty quickly, so there must have been checks - and that was in the mid 80s!

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