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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is anyone unreasonable here? School run bike collision

30 replies

loopyluna · 03/04/2013 14:21

School run is along long path. No traffic, lots of kids, mums, buggies etc.
Some children take scooters, bikes etc.
7 year old on bike, lent to her by friend. Brakes broken (friend's mum knew but forgot to say), child not going quickly but still can't slow down and bumps 4 year old, knocking her over. 4 year old has grazed knee and is v upset. 7 year old also distressed.
As far as I am concerned, moral of the story is, no more bikes on the path! Scooter or walk and if bikes really needed, take a different route...
Uninvolved school mum witness thinks 7 year old should be punished... Really?

OP posts:
Vicky2011 · 03/04/2013 14:24

surely the mum who let a child use a bike without brakes is at fault!

CloudsAndTrees · 03/04/2013 14:25

No, the 7yo should not be punished. They didn't o anything wrong.

However, the mother who allowed a child on a bike without working brakes should be told she is an idiot.

Movingtimes · 03/04/2013 14:26

No of course the child shouldn't be punished. Apologise to the 4 year old yes of course and try to comfort her, but why punish her. The adult took the decision to let her use the bike on the path, another adult took the decision not to mention non-working brakes and nobody's suggesting punishing them.
Uninvolved school mum needs to save her opinions for someone who wants them.

Goodwordguide · 03/04/2013 14:26

Err...not using a bike without brakes is the only 'moral' here I can see. I don't know why bikes are any worse than scooters in terms of speed. I certainly wouldn't punish the child for the deficient bike.

TheChimpParadox · 03/04/2013 14:28

and what punishment does the 'involved mother' think the 7 yr old should have ? Hmm

Original poster
loopyluna · 03/04/2013 14:32

Relieved! My DD is the 7 year old. She'd had lunch with a friend and been lent the dodgy bike Hmm
DD is v upset, got off the bike as soon as she could and tried to comfort the 4 year old. Today she took her a picture to say "sorry".
Other mum told me that her DC are careful on their bikes and would never hurt another child. She can't believe I didn't yell at DD about it (she is quite a shouty mum herself.) I just don't agree that DD needed shouting at as she was clearly sorry and hadn't done it on purpose.
I did suggest friend's mum got brakes fixed though!

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 03/04/2013 14:35

Your DD sounds sweet. The two other parents... Hmm

ImTooHecsyForYourParty · 03/04/2013 14:36

uninvolved school mum needs to get a grip.

The child was on a bike with no brakes! The person who needs a punishment is the person who didn't make sure that the bike was safe! That 7 yr old could have been really hurt if they'd got up a good speed then found no brakes.

squeakytoy · 03/04/2013 14:36

Bikes are not meant to be on footpaths, so it sounds a bit dangerous that kids are riding bikes where there are a lot of small kids walking about.. brakes or no brakes.

Loulybelle · 03/04/2013 14:37

7 year old is not at fault, the mother who lent the bike is, it could have been so much worse than it was.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty · 03/04/2013 14:37

x post. I hope your friend does get the brakes sorted before a child riding that bike finds themselves under a bus!

MissyMooandherBeaverofSteel · 03/04/2013 14:39

Sorry but I think you were in the wrong, a busy footpath on a school run isn't the place for a bike.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty · 03/04/2013 14:39

"Other mum told me that her DC are careful on their bikes"

Yeah? Bikes with brakes?

Silly woman. If she wants to offer unasked for opinions, she should offer them to the person who let a child onto a bike she knew was unsafe.

Chiggers · 03/04/2013 14:40

TBH, I don't think scooters should be on the pathways either. I've given up counting the amount of times I've been clipped, once ending with me getting a bang resulting in a chipped elbow and nasty gash. To add fuel to the fire, the parent gave off to me for standing in the way Angry.

My elbow's OK now but if the parent had said anything else to me, I probably would have verbally ripped into her. I'm normally the type to shrug my shoulders and ignore, and it take an extreme amount of goading to make my heckles rise, but that parent made me realise how well I can hold my temper back Grin.

MrsLouisTheroux · 03/04/2013 14:40

You should have checked that the brakes worked before letting your DD ride the bike and the mother of bike owner should have let you know.
It's not your DD's fault :(

hedgefund · 03/04/2013 14:41

it's an accident, they happen, move on

Chiggers · 03/04/2013 14:44

I agree with the poster who said that you should have checked the bike over to make sure it's safe to ride. Saying that, the friend's mum should have said no to lending it in the first place.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty · 03/04/2013 14:44

oh, I read it that the OP wasn't there.

Original poster
loopyluna · 03/04/2013 14:57

I was and wasn't there! I wasn't there at lunchtime when the loan took place. I was there to pick her up but, as she'd ridden to school, she obviously had to ride back again! It didn't occur to me to check the brakes as the bike is in good condition, in fact identical to DD's own bike. I think it would have been a bit cheeky actually, to whip the bike away from DD and check it over anyway!
Then again, it was only after the accident, DD said she hadn't been able to brake and friend's mum said "oh, yeah, the front brakes are broken!" Grrr! So maybe, I should have been cheeky!
Anyway, I'm going to stick to scooters or walking. We only live 10 minutes away so DD doesn't need to ride. I might also, tell her to say "no thank you" if she's offered a loan of a bike again too!

OP posts:
Original poster
loopyluna · 03/04/2013 15:00

Just re-read, clearly the bike isn't "in good condition" -I meant it appeared to be "in good condition" as in, it isn't an old, clapped out looking contraption Confused

OP posts:
NigellaTufnel · 03/04/2013 15:25

I don't think your DD should be punished, but she just needs to be told that this is why we are careful on bikes and loom how easily an accident can happen.
No one was seriously hurt, but you could use it an an opportunity to let her know to be wary near other bikes, cars etc.

SoupDragon · 03/04/2013 15:36

The mother who leant the bike is the one at fault.

Under ordinary circumstances though, I would say that a 7 yo riding a bike into a 4yo is to blame and needs to be told off and reminded to be careful. Did the other mother know the bike had been leant and was faulty?

Tailtwister · 03/04/2013 15:57

Punish her for what? She hasn't done anything!

No, of course your DD shouldn't be punished. It was an accident, facilitated by the fact she was lent a faulty bike. The mother who lent it to her should be relieved her stupidity didn't result in a more serious accident, or worse.

mnistooaddictive · 03/04/2013 16:07

Scooters are just as dangerous as bikes so ban one means banning both.

5Foot5 · 03/04/2013 16:56

YABU for not telling "shouty mum" to butt out and mind her own business and keep her opinions on child rearing to herself.