To think children aren't actually that expensive?

[NorthernAnnie]

We have 3 DC, 2 share a room and the other has his own room. We get a lot of clothes & toys from charity shops, or H&M and sell them on ebay when finished with them. They have swimming lessons and do clubs at school. We don't eat out often or buy expensive gadgets/designer clothes, our main spend is food but we still manage to do this relatively cheaply.
I'm a SAHM so this saves on childcare which would be incredibly expensive otherwise, but childcare excluded, AIBU to think DC aren't actually that expensive?

YANBU to think yours aren't

YABU to think everyone else is the same.

Besides the fact not everyone can afford to stay home, your kids haven't got to teenage/university age yet I assume?

the 'childcare exclude' bit is the salient point. How old are they? They get considerably more expensive as they get older?

yeah how old are they? My 16 year old is pretty expensive to maintain.

I agree you can't just 'exclude' child care. I pay over £600 a month in child care. I am hoping that when they go to school I will be rich! realises that they will cost the same in different ways

Feeding and clothing a pre-schooler = not very expensive
Childcare for a pre-schooler = £10k+ a year
Feeding a clothing a teenager = rather more expensive

Bigger house/car, extra seats on planes etc = also very expensive.

Babies and toddlers don't cost very much though, especially if you breastfeed and are a SAHM.

It's the loss of work when they need looking after that costs. And childcare when you go back to work.

You wait until they are teenagers. Come back and tell me they are not expensive then.

Well, they can be.

Without them, you could live in a bedsit, never have the heating on, barely use water... food for one or two. That would be far cheaper

But seriously, it does add up. the family home instead of single/couple accomodation. family holiday with school holiday premium food, electric, gas, water, phone bill (I am SO glad I have boys ) shoes clothes hobbies activities school trips. If you need childcare that costs a bloody fortune!

I don't think it has to cost anywhere close to the what is it they claim now? over £220,000 click here but it's certainly the biggest expense you'll ever have in life!

And you can't 'exclude childcare' in order to make your point childcare is an essential expense for many people. naughty OP

I think your being a little naive, they get more expensive as they get older, yes you can get by relatively cheaply on second hand stuff when they are little, but not so much when they are older

personally i would rather my children have better than that, especially as they get older, which is why i work my socks of and only have one dependant child, but thats just me

Small children and their accoutrements aren't.

You are in for a shock though if you think they will accept as willingingly your current lifestyle when they are 12/13/14/15!

It would cost me more money to work than not to though....

True, kim. Good point it could be argued that the loss of earnings of say, £26,000 a year (average wage apparently) is a cost of having kids.

So, say, 5 years = £130,000 down before you've spent a penny on them.

If I think about how much money me and DP would have if we hadn't had a child, then he has cost us a lot - we would still be in a small, cheap flat, we'd have a double income, we wouldn't have the heating on all day etc.

So they are at least costing you your salary then NorthernAnnie, if not childcare. How much would you be earning if you hadn't had children?

You've lost your entire wage, that is very expensive!

NorthernAnnie - yes, but if you had no kids, you would presumably be working? So having kids means you are losing out on your potential income.

MajaBiene - This is true! I hadn't looked at it that way. I wouldn't earn much at all, luckily DH earns more.

Goodness, I have never even thought of the true cost of having kids with regard to bigger house, car, holidays, working part time etc. These two terrors really are costing me a fortune!

You are the childcare if you are a sahm. Otherwise you would be at work wouldnt you? You just cant exclude it. That makes no sense. The cost of childcare is the salary you would have if you didn't have kids. And as pp have said the expense mounts up, particularly food and clothing.

most of the time, Kim.

We have been helping DS to put deposit on first home ! not cheap!
Felt it would be better he has the money now than wait until we are gone when there prob won't be any left anyway

After 6 months maternity leave followed by London childcare costs we're going to be very poor!
Spending money on clothing and child size food portions doesn't worry me in the slightest!