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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be disgusted!

44 replies

lightsandshapes · 10/02/2013 19:00

My neighbour helped out with a family fun day recently. These are put on by the local family centre and funded with grants and public money. She admitted she fixed the raffle to favour one particular mum. I am disgusted and think people pay their money I good faith it could be them. How can I shop her without looking like a tell tale??

OP posts:

thebody · 10/02/2013 19:01

I think that's fraud and the police could prosecute her.

She needs to watch her step boasting about this.

ComposHat · 10/02/2013 19:03

if that is all you have to worry about you have a fortunate life. beak out and get in with your own life.

HecateWhoopass · 10/02/2013 19:04

That's bloody awful.

I hope you were openly disgusted at her.

you can't 'shop' her without her thinking of you as a tell tale, but in your shoes, I wouldn't give a shit what she thinks.

The organisers need to know to not let her be in charge of the raffle again. Whether they say anything to her or not.

benbobaggins · 10/02/2013 19:04

YANBU and I would shop her if I were you...

lollilou · 10/02/2013 19:06

Why did she fix it? Was this woman in dire need or gone through some kind of trauma?
Or was it a mate or relative?

MrsRajeshKoothrappali · 10/02/2013 19:08

Obtaining money by deception....!!

Not on. Is one of the reasons I don't take part in local raffles.

Original poster

lightsandshapes · 10/02/2013 19:09

Well she likes her lollilou and also because this particular mum helps out with the cleaning a lot. But then we all do our bit..... Just thinking of a sneaky way to deb her in. She is also a local councillor so I hate to think what she gets up to there!

OP posts:

Original poster

lightsandshapes · 10/02/2013 19:11

Compos hat. Fair enough. I just hate liers of any kind!

OP posts:

Chottie · 10/02/2013 19:12

I think that is disgusting. Why did she tell you? was she boasting?

Original poster

lightsandshapes · 10/02/2013 19:26

Not sure why she let it slip. I was saying how nice x mum was over coffee and she got carried away and said, 'oh did you notice there was one strip of tickets that was a different colour from the rest?' I said, yes, I did actually!! I had asked for an orange strip but she said, 'none left sorry'. What a lie!!

OP posts:

lollilou · 10/02/2013 19:26

Then that is disgusting. I could just about see it if the woman was in some kind of trouble, homeless,victim of dv or something, but that's wrong. What did you say to her?

CuriousMama · 10/02/2013 19:29

She's a councillor now why doesn't that surprise me Does she also have a moat?

Definitely tell the organisers. She sounds vile.

LittleChimneyDroppings · 10/02/2013 19:32

Dob her in. Goodness knows what she gets up to as a councillor. Its not a surprise though.

BeerTricksPotter · 10/02/2013 19:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HecateWhoopass · 10/02/2013 20:01

She probably palmed her mate's tickets.

I am probably very black and white on the issue, but I do think it's disgusting. It shows a total lack of consideration of the people who handed over their money and expected that things would be handled fairly. Who is she to decide that they don't stand a chance, because she wants to make sure her mate gets stuff?

imo, it's the principle of the thing. I don't honestly see the difference between fixing a raffle for a bag of sweets and one for a luxury car. It's not right.

Original poster

lightsandshapes · 10/02/2013 20:21

Hecate totally agree its the principe.

OP posts:

BelleEtLaBaby · 10/02/2013 20:36

How do you think the recipient of this favour would feel if it came out? Or the other entrants?

Yes, it's a petty issue but still not on, and this person shouldn't be allowed to run the raffle again.

Aren't there licences or laws about being allowed to run a raffle?

BeerTricksPotter · 10/02/2013 20:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KatyTheCleaningLady · 10/02/2013 21:07

Thanks for this thread. It reminded me to finally send an email and report someone who had asked me to organize a raffle and then told me that he'd rigged it so that a particular person would win. I didn't send an email for a long time because there were other ethical concerns and it was all very complicated and then I had to move house.
But, I just wrote and sent the email and I feel good.

PrettyKitty1986 · 10/02/2013 21:19

I rigged the stall I was in charge of at work for children in need.
It was based on 2 decks of cards...certain cards (drawn at random) related to particular prizes. The 60 or so poor sods that paid their £1 first didn't 't have a hope of winning anything decent because I took all the winning cards out and didn't put them back until over half way through.
I also gave a very nice lady from my department a nudge towards a winner so that she got a prize she'd been looking at.
So shoot me. She was a nice person who'd had a shit day and it made her happy. Someone had to win...why not her?
I just wasn't stupid enough to tell anyone.

CuriousMama · 10/02/2013 23:23

It's illegal to shoot people afaik? Unless you are actually a kitty? You're not nice either then PK1986.

Hemlet · 10/02/2013 23:28

Ugh I hate it when people say 'if that's your only problem you're lucky and should get lost'. I'm sure it's not her only problem, sometimes shit happens which is annoying and you want to share it.

Making twattish comments like that is unhelpful and pathetic.

StuntGirl · 10/02/2013 23:32

It's illegal and a shitty thing to do.

Yes its low down on the list of Bad Things That Happen In The World but it's still wrong.

I would have no qualms about dobbing her in.

ThisIsMummyPig · 10/02/2013 23:35

The trouble is you can tell surestart, but it won't get you very far. You don't have enough proof to do anything public. Is there any way you can trap her, and then send it to a local paper so it ruins her political career?

The nest of vipers can surely come up with an idea or two.

Booyhoo · 10/02/2013 23:42

hope you feel good about that prettykitty that's £60 people gave in good faith thinking they were paying for a chance at the prize. i hope someone spotted what you did and has spread the word. do you ever feel paranoid that you're being talked about?

OP i would dob them in without question and i wouldn't give a shit if they knew it was me who did it. the fact that she is a councillor, even moreso that she should be called on her behaviour.

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