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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Poor ds needed a nap in school today

39 replies

Waitingforastartofall · 25/01/2013 21:00

I feel so mean, i had warned them that he was tired and could come home if needed. His great grandad has been in hospital and we have visited for two nights out of the five hes been there. visiting doesnt finish until 7.30 then it has been a half hour drive home which has took longer due to the bad weather. By the time he has got home had quick supper and gone to bed its been later than usual

Apparently today he told his teacher he was really tired so she said he could have a lie down, he was asleep for 2 hours! I feel like a v mean mum. Ds nanna was very poorly in hospital a couple of months ago .she was terminally ill and passed away in November, when his great grandad was taken into hosp ds was really upset so ive been taking him to reassure him that he was okay and was being looked after and would be coming home again.

OP posts:
Original poster
Waitingforastartofall · 25/01/2013 21:02

Thought i was posting in chat but never mind, aibu to feel totally crap that he needed to go to sleep in school?

OP posts:
dexter73 · 25/01/2013 21:03

What is your question? Do you think you should have kept him off school today or do you think the school should have phoned you to collect him?

sittinginthesun · 25/01/2013 21:03

Ah, I think it's a really good sign that he felt comfortable enough at school to tell his teacher, secure enough to sleep there, and that his teacher was able to work with this. Smile

My DS2 used to crash out now and then, and they had a lovely quiet area for tired LOs.

apostropheuse · 25/01/2013 21:04

What age is he?

dexter73 · 25/01/2013 21:04

x-post! Kids often used to have a kip at school if they were tired so yanbu. I assume he is quite young?

Original poster
Waitingforastartofall · 25/01/2013 21:05

Hes 5, sorry for the no aibu i thought it was in chat. I feel very bad for sending him in but he seemed his normal self,no problem with what the school did

OP posts:
dexter73 · 25/01/2013 21:08

Don't feel mean - I bet he enjoyed his snooze at school!

blackeyedsusan · 25/01/2013 21:09

i have had children curl up on the floor and go to sleep. poor things arer exhausted by school at first. not that unusual.

apostropheuse · 25/01/2013 21:09

Gosh five is still very young, the weel soul was obviously exhausted.

Maybe in future it would be better only to visit the hospital at weekends so that he gets enough sleep during the week.

The teacher seems very kind and thoughtful to let him nap though.

tearoomtrash · 25/01/2013 21:11

Don't worry, I have often made up a little bed of cushions at the back of my classroom for children who have felt tired or a little unwell. The teacher will not think badly of you, and neither should you. Better for him to be in school but miss a couple of hours than to be at home all day.

Lexiesinclair · 25/01/2013 21:12

Oh bless him. I remember at my primary school there was a sleeping corner where tired reception kids could have a nap.
At least he's managed to catch up a bit and like Sitting said he felt comfortable enough to do so.
I hope his Grandad gets better soon.

Original poster
Waitingforastartofall · 25/01/2013 21:12

He has been telling everyone about his sleep at school so i imagine he did. Hopefully visiting again wont be a need as his great grandad came home today. I thought i was doing the right thing as he was quite upset and kept saying he didnt like his grumps being at the hospital because they didnt make his nanna better. felt so sad for him that thats how he was feeling and what he thought of hospitals :(

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LittleChimneyDroppings · 25/01/2013 21:13

Oh don't worry, he got a nap and he's fine.

Fakebook · 25/01/2013 21:14

Don't worry about it. I know how hospital trips can get tiring for children. It's good he had a nap. Dd is 5 and was told to go to sleep as soon as she got home today by her teacher because she was snoozing during story time. We've been having terrible nights due to ds's teething.

amistillsexy · 25/01/2013 21:14

When I was in Reception class, the entire class used to have a nap after lunch. 'Heads down' it was called- we folded our arms on our desks and put our heads on them.
There were little camp beds at the back of the room as well, for those who needed a more extended sleep!
I think we sometimes expect far more of our LOs than previous generations did.
OP, yanbu. It's lovely that your DS was able to have a nap.

Original poster
Waitingforastartofall · 25/01/2013 21:21

it seems having a sleep at school is more commonplace than i thought id never heard it before today. Hope you all get a good nights sleep fakebook

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tearoomtrash · 25/01/2013 21:22

The children in my class are 9, and it wouldn't occur to me not to let them nap if they needed to - even less so a 5 year old. Hope it has helped him to catch up on his sleep a bit.

ThoughtsPlease · 25/01/2013 21:35

I know you didn't mean to post in AIBU, but as someone else said, perhaps the visits could have been better planned so he wasn't in bed so late on school nights?

You say visiting didn't finish until 7.30pm, but surely you didn't need to stay until the end? You said he needed supper when you got home, why didn't you give him something to eat at some point in the many hours from school to getting home?

If your DS wanted reassurance that he was ok surely that could be seen without staying for hours?

Actually I am really quite surprised at the responses that sleeping at school when you are 5 is absolutely fine, obviously there may be some circumstances where it may happen, but I think we should try and ensure that our children are not so tired that they fall asleep at school due to what we have chosen to do with them the night before.

It looks like I might be in the minority in this thinking though! Smile

thebody · 25/01/2013 21:38

Hi op, I was 5 in 1970!!! And I remember every afternoon it was heads on desks and close eyes..

We slept... That was a sensible age!!!

Original poster
Waitingforastartofall · 25/01/2013 21:40

unfortunatly visiting was up till three thirty which we wouldnt of made after school finished or six thirty till seven thirty so couldnt really be avoided. We went in the car with his wife and son (my dad) so couldnt leave after ten mins as they wanted him to have company for the full hour after being alone all day. Now he is home though bed times will go back to the same. I also like you wasnt thrilled at hearing he needed to have a sleep at school and id never heard of it happening before but was told by teacher today it frequently does happen. Hopefully wont be happening again now though Smile

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Original poster
Waitingforastartofall · 25/01/2013 21:40

i wish we had a head on desk time at home... it sounds like a good way to spend an afternoon Grin bet it wasnt comfy though

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edwinbear · 25/01/2013 22:56

We used to have mats in the hall we slept on after lunch when I first started school - I had forgotten all about that until I read this. Better to have a sleep and then be able to concentrate on lessons afterwards than to be dozing all afternoon at that age, surely.

thegreylady · 25/01/2013 23:13

My dd was August born and started school shortly after her fourth birthday. Her teacher had a thick foam mat by her desk where dd and anyone else who needed to could have a nap. The whole class also had heads down after lunch. I remember that when I was five in 1949 :-)

wannabedomesticgoddess · 25/01/2013 23:23

I once had to have a sleep in P1 because I had a bug and the school couldnt get my mum. It was on a little camp bed in the house corner.

I went home with one of the reception boys mums who my granny worked for and vomited all over her house.

That would never ever happen now!

quoteunquote · 25/01/2013 23:23

If he was a Danish child he would have a sleep after lunch every day.