Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask when it's 'inappropriate' to bathe with your child?

38 replies

Alwaysasking · 10/01/2013 20:41

I still take baths with my 4 y/o ds, we are very 'open' with our bodies in our house and so long as ds is comfortable and respects himself and the boundaries I don't see a problem with it. However a friend of mine was recently shocked I still share a bath with him and thought it was inappropriate. I guess everyone will vary depending on their own upbringing but I am interested in the general consensus here.

OP posts:
HoneyDragon · 10/01/2013 20:43

When they have to shave.

Don't worry about it. They will let you know when they don't want to Smile

carabos · 10/01/2013 20:43

When the child gives you the Hmm look and tells you to get out IMO.

LineRunner · 10/01/2013 20:44

It really varies.

TraineeBabyCatcher · 10/01/2013 20:45

When they dont want it any more.

TooTiredToBeCreative · 10/01/2013 20:46

My 9 yo ds will jump in the bath with me given half the chance, we do have a huge bath and if I am really unlucky I end up with all 3 ds's in with me! I think you need to be guided by how your child feels about nudity etc.

Ilovexmastime · 10/01/2013 20:46

I stopped when my DS who was 6 pointed at my vagina and said yuk, look at that!

N0tinmylife · 10/01/2013 20:46

When you or the child starts to feel uncomfortable with it. At 4 I certainly wouldn't see a problem.

cathpip · 10/01/2013 20:46

I still have the ocassional bath with my ds (4), mind you Sat and Sun is shower time and its a good job we have a large shower as i have to share with both ds and dd (2). :)

Pandemoniaa · 10/01/2013 20:46

They'll tell you when they don't want to share their bath. But at 4 there's nothing even vaguely inappropriate about you bathing with your ds.

spongebobsquareeyes · 10/01/2013 20:46

My Dd1 is 6 and doesn't like this anymore, but my Dd2 who is 3 still likes sharing a bath or shower. I never used to be able to have a bath without them stripping of and jumping in!

Original poster
Alwaysasking · 10/01/2013 20:47

Haha, ds loves taking baths together! He does have them on his own at times but he prefers to have them with me. He has started to question why girls have nipples (he was under the impression that only boys do) but I see all these questions as a chance for him to learn anyway.

OP posts:
spanky2 · 10/01/2013 20:48

When they stare at your fanjo and boobs .Wink

apostropheuse · 10/01/2013 20:48

Why would you want to bathe with a child anyway? I rgenuinely don't understand why people do this.

NumericalMum · 10/01/2013 20:50

My sil was mortified that I saw no problem with my DH and 4 yo sharing a bath. Surely if it was a problem then I would be more worried? Genuinely can't remember the last time they bathed together but they often shower together if we are in a hurry!

Mutt · 10/01/2013 20:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bedmonster · 10/01/2013 20:55

He will tell you when he's had enough!

apostropheuse I don't share baths with mine either, I did when they were babies, it was easier sometimes, but haven't since they were about 6 months old, and I have never shared with DS. DP often has a shower with him though.

I hated sharing baths with them anyway, I love a hot hot bath, filled right to the top and loads of bubbles in. And a long old soak with my book. All impossible with DC in there too!

Although I can see why some do it, it's not for me, i'm waaaay to selfish when it comes to bath time Grin

catgirl1976 · 10/01/2013 20:56

When you both can't fit?

Or when they don't want to anymore.

FamiliesShareGerms · 10/01/2013 20:57

Mutt, you're spot on

I was thinking about this today, coming home thinking I needed a bath and may as well jump in with DS (7). Then I realised that although he is happy to be naked around me, and not bothered by me being naked either, we don't fit in the bath together anymore Sad

Shybairns · 10/01/2013 20:59

Yeah, If you can still fit in it together then its fine. Rule of thumb.

PacificDogwood · 10/01/2013 20:59

Whenever either one of you is no longer comfortable with it.

Staring at boobs and bits - my boys did that from about 1 year onwards. As my body is the only female body they are likely to see for the time being, I think it is rather a good thing that they look and see differences to their own bodies. And daddy's Grin

PacificDogwood · 10/01/2013 21:00

Btw, I've never shared a bath with them. I don't 'do' baths. I shower, honest, I do.

directoroflegacy · 10/01/2013 21:06

I have a photo (!) of me in a bath with my dad and brother.
I was 11 ish, db 9 ish
It would have been early 80s - different era!
Shock
BTW I do think that this is too old!

Mutt · 10/01/2013 21:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

laughinglikeadrain · 10/01/2013 21:09

my dd always wants to jump in with me! sometimes i let her but sometimes i dont. she is 9. funnily we never bathed together when she was really small cos i couldnt do the juggly we are both wet thingy.

DD has also started asking to have baths with her friends so that they can play with her toys, but she always says... can we have a bath together if we both have our swimmers on?

pjmama · 10/01/2013 21:11

6YO DS grinningly informed me recently that he likes the pink bits on the end of my boobies. I figured that it's probably time I started covering up (and teach him the correct word for nipples)!