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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU????

32 replies

39widow · 03/01/2013 09:17

cant make you my mind whether i being unreasonable or horomonal

i am currently preganant with dc 3 - we found out i am having a boy, and the first thing everyone says is oh you poor woman 3 boys (other dc boys)

what happened to congrats, or anything along those lines

i mean i under the great impression you have children because you want them not you only want them if they are certain sex

Angry
OP posts:
peaceandlovebunny · 03/01/2013 09:18

congratulations! ignore anyone who isn't delighted for you. some people would say you are exceptionally blessed.

VisualiseAHorse · 03/01/2013 09:22

Everyone said to my mum 'you must be glad you're having a boy!, you can stop trying now' after she'd already had three girls. Like only having a son was worth it Confused

HecatePropolos · 03/01/2013 09:23

congrats.

There are some very stupid people who believe that other people's families aren't complete unless you have children of both genders Hmm don't give them a thought. Anyone who can actually think that you need both in order to be a proper parent is a twat of the highest order and automatically loses their right to any space in your head.

UptoapointLordCopper · 03/01/2013 09:28

Congratulations! Boys are good. And so are girls, of course. :) Feign deafness and smile politely. Or do the classic MN shocked "Did you mean to be so rude?"

cozietoesie · 03/01/2013 09:31

Congratulations! (And just pay no attention to The Stupid Ones.)

Smile
ChaoticintheNewYear · 03/01/2013 09:34

Congratulations Thanks

Ignore the idiots.

wewereherefirst · 03/01/2013 09:38

Congratulations! People are idiotic, I second the asking them outright if they wanted to be so rude.

Binfullofgibletsonthe26th · 03/01/2013 09:39

Congratulations! 3 boys will be brilliant, bet you can't wait!

jessjessjess · 03/01/2013 09:46

I think some people have this really weird idea that boys aren't nice children to have and all women want girls.

There was a piece a while back in one of broadsheets - Guardian or Independent maybe - from a lady who had all boys saying why they are great, as she was so sick of this.

theITgirl · 03/01/2013 09:47

Unless you are my friend who is also newly pregnant. She has two lovely boys who she adores, I know she would also love another boy. But, she has said things to me in the past about how lucky I am to have a girl. Even so I would still not say anything negative.

theITgirl · 03/01/2013 09:49

Oh and congratulations - big disadvantage of "one-of-each" is that they have little in common so mine seem to fight a lot more than my friends children who have all boys.

Bluebelleswood · 03/01/2013 13:52

Congratulations! My Ds has 3 grown up boys. They are a fantastic team and always have been. They support and even spoil their mum! I am quite envious of the relationship she has with each of them. You are very fortunate, ignore all the silly comments. People said this sort of thing to my Ds all those years ago. If only they had known what we know now.
Best wishes!

chocoluvva · 03/01/2013 14:08

Much more practical and economical than having more than one gender.
Hope you have a good pregnancy.

phantomnamechanger · 03/01/2013 14:17

congratulations OP, here's wishing you an easy time of it and a lovely baby boy.

ignore people and their need to make daft comments - we had "third time lucky" in big letters inside a card from DH friend when we had DS - only the idiot semed to have forgotten DS was our 4th child, as our 3rd DD had been stillborn. To have DS alive and well was such a joy and relief, but it still stung, that some people thought our loss of DD3 was less bad because she was "only" another girl, and we already had 2 of those Sad

we have also had the "you can stop trying now" idiots - like its anyones business how many children we decide to have! and the "bet DH glad its not another girl this time" (see above about DD3). Grrr!!

then again, some folk are like that themselves and judge everyone else by their own thoughts and feelings - I have a friend who openly says that if she had had her DD first, she would not have had other children. she has 2 DSs who must have felt very unloved!

curiousuze · 03/01/2013 14:19

Some people just open their mouths and let their belly rumble. Congratulations on your little boy!

gordyslovesheep · 03/01/2013 14:22

Congratulations

I have 3 girls - I know the shit people spout - ignore it x

NaturalBaby · 03/01/2013 14:24

I have 3 boys and have been very lucky not to have any really rude comments, but we didn't find out till ds3 was born. We did get a few comments about trying for another which I always laugh off by stating the obvious 'you can't choose boy or girl when you get pregnant' or 'I love having 3 boys'.

I would love to say 'do you mean to be so rude?' to someone!

Dinosaurdrip · 03/01/2013 14:27

Congratulations, yanbu at all! I got this (from my mother) when we found out that DC2 was a boy, already had DS1. When I was expecting DC3 everyone assumed we had only gone for a third because we were desperate for a girl (not the case) when we found out we were in fact expecting DD the amount. Of people who said things like 'you must be relieved' and 'well you've finally got your girl' etc was amazing. My mother said she would have been disappointed if DD were a DS Hmm.

rhondajean · 03/01/2013 14:30

YANBU! I have two lovely girls but I would have given my right arm for three (or even more) boys.

Congratulations Xmas Envy

Fakebook · 03/01/2013 14:37

When I had my son, everyone told me my family was now complete as I had a girl and boy. I still feel a bit Confused about this. People are rude, so just ignore them and yanbu.

NotGeoffVader · 03/01/2013 14:45

I only have the one child but I am grumpy and horrible arsey of an age where I'd pull people up on it if we got such feedback on any future children not likely as DH doesn't want any more. But you're right, congratulations are most certainly in order! Have some Thanks

steben · 03/01/2013 16:57

I have 2 girls and get the same in reverse and my DH gets many pitying comments about being stuck with 3 women and I get a lot of negativity about what they will be like as teenagers!!! I find it very annoying tbh Hmm

GlitterySkulls · 03/01/2013 17:02

i got the whole "oh, that's clever, having a boy, then a girl... esp. with the two year gap, that's worked out perfect, you clever girl!" err, what? Confused people are idiots, i wouldn't get worked up about it.

and congratulations Grin

hygienequeen · 03/01/2013 17:05

Congratulations ! I have 3 boys, had all the comments " will you try for a girl next" er no ! I am SO happy with my lads, that any comment now " you're brave" etc just washes over me !

MogTheForgetfulCat · 03/01/2013 17:26

Congratulations! I have 3 boys and it is fab - they are all lovely and I am so proud of them. I have had inane "hands full" comments and quite a lot of being openly pitied. But have also had some lovely people say nice things so it probably balances out in the end Smile