To be hiding in the bedroom?

[Ozziegirly]

I probably am BU. I have a 3 week old DS and a 2 year old as well. My in laws have been here for a month and the noise and activity has driven me to my room....

I'm pretending to feed the baby but in reality I'm just enjoying some peace and quiet with a cup of tea.

They love DS1 but they only have one activity level; "frantic" and so he is het up and over excited constantly. They took him to the park this morning (nice) and ignored all the snacks I left (and pointed out) so when we picked him up he was almost hysterical with hunger.

They are doing nothing "wrong" apart from doing things differently, I know that but fuuuuccckkk I am finding it quite hard going.

All that noise and activity at 3 a.m.? Do you seriously need an excuse to go to your room?

Think the clues in her name (she's down under). And no OP YANBU .

YANBU I hope they don't expect you to calm him down to get him to bed.

Ah, shipped dad off yesterday! So glad to have my home to myself and get the Lo's back into a vague routine. My mum was the worst for being too excited and no naps etc

We have had to institute the "pre nap calm down" - making more work for us, so getting him down for his nap is now taking the best part of 45 mins (used to be about 15!). Pre nap stories, loo trip, then more stories, another loo trip, one more story.

At least he's getting read to

They don't even stop for lunch - MIL said "he didn't want his last slice of bread" - well no, you were hanging him upside down at the time.

I just like quiet, I really do.

Thank god DH is with me - another lover of quiet. He wondered if he was adopted.

Oh god, I can hear singing now at the baby, I hoped that DS1's nap would provide a reprieve.

A month?!?!?!?!?! My mum, yes, no problems. My ILs? Hell no!

They are here for another month as well.....

Tbf, I would struggle with anyone for this length of time.

Ok, I can't hide in here any longer.

Once more into the breach....

OG, I feel for you, having experienced a similar eight week stay in the reverse direction - are the ILs visiting from the uk? Book them an organised bus your for a week as a lovely surprise. Seriously.

I think maybe the OP is in Australia, hence the user name, and the IL's staying for two months? That would explain why they are all up at 3am!

Good luck - I have a 3 week old and I've had visitors staying on and off since he was born. It's driving me fucking nuts. I hid in my bedroom for an hour tonight just so I could spend time alone with my poor little boy who has been passed around between a million family members today. I get my house and sanity back on Wednesday...

I feel for you. Luckily DH and I are on the same page when it comes to keeping DD on her schedule. My outlaws left yesterday after a 3 week visit and kept DD up through her nap so they could spend the day with her before they flew home. She was a disaster after we dropped them off the airport. At least DH was really pissed with his mother because today has been a nightmare with her being so off schedule yesterday.

2 months is a very long time to have anyone staying in your home. I would be exhausted...... Good luck

i've survived 6 weeks, i was counting down at the end.

YANBU hiding in the bedroom to 'feed' is my plan once DC2 arrives (currently 40+5 with another 8 weeks of in-laws to go).

Oh I could weep for you OP, because my ILs are similar!

They only do "frantic" as we'll, and always go slightly gaga in the presence of DD. The whole time she's awake it's a cacophony of singing, yelling, clapping and tickling... even when she's trying to eat. I lost my rag when an attempt at washing her face was interrupted by a chorus of "If you're happy and you know it"

Luckily we only stayed with them for 48 hours over Christmas, and I was climbing the walls even then.

Violet, it sounds identical! Even DH despairs. We were watching a quiet dvd earlier and they were even clapping and singing along with that.

I totally know it comes from a place of love but jesus, it's exhausting and sends DS slightly doolally. Plus he is having later and later naps so is a bit tired and is barely eating as they don't leave him alone for long enough to eat a proper meal.

However, I have a wonderfully soft snuggly little gorgeous baby, so I can't feel too hard done by.

when are they going away? another month? dear God.

next time, they have to stay in a hotel. or build a cottage in your yard, a home-office type thing. you need your space.

meantime, that baby needs a lot of feeding. and you need a lot of quiet cups of tea. get ds1 in there for a nap, too.

i don't know how you stand it. i really don't. i would have been behind bars for multiple homicide before the month was up.

I know they're not being malicious and yes its lovely you have caring grandparents when some people don't but I would seriously have had a word by now. Disrupting nap time and eating especially is seriously not on.

Its not like its a change in routine for only a day or 2 - its 2 months of it! In you situation I would chat to your husband about how you need to (nicely) say something, then present a united front where you tell then that while you appreciate that they love your kids and you love having then stay they really do need to turn it down a notch or two. Why should you spend 2 months stressed and upset when you could just say "No"?

You're right, it DOES come from a place of love. Doesn't make it any less annoying though.

I ended up going upstairs "for a shower" and shutting myself in a bedroom for ages, enjoying the quiet. Could still hear it all going on downstairs though.

Wish DH would tell them to calm the fuck down but he is very adept at tuning them out so it barely registers with him. Next time MIL is disrupting a mealtime I will have to say something.